Seven year old stepchild making my relationship fall apart

[deleted account] ( 3 moms have responded )

My significant other has a 7 year old daughter whom lives out of state. We get her at different times throughout the year and a minimum of 4 weeks during summer. I am a stay at home mom of two children ages three and three months on a normal basis. Right now his daughter is staying with us for her summer visit, so while daddy is at work I have three kids at home with me.
The problem: He disciplines my three year old daughter constantly, but I am pretty much not allowed to give his daughter discipline because she does not receive any at her mothers. (She is an only child) So my problem with this is that she is seven years old and acts worse than my three year old when she is here with me. Today she physically hurt my three year old by knocking her to the ground just because she could and had not response when I said something to her about it, but started crying like I had beat her when I called her dad to give him "the scoop". I am ready to throw in the towel because it is only getting worse. She acts like a perfect angel when he is around and then 100% different when he is not home. He also still treats her like she is two as well, which I find very inappropriate. When he came home all he said was, "honey you shouldn't do that" then he kissed her and acted like nothing had happened. I do not know what to do, but his child is pushing me away from him and we have been arguing everyday since she has been here. I can not keep this up! It is hurting me and I am to the point that I want to refuse to watch his daughter while she is here or take my two children some place else. PLEASE HELP!


View replies by

Tricia - posted on 07/21/2016




Its hard co-parenting. I'm sure you are frustrated. Could you and Dh sit down and talk about expectations of the kids and get on common ground with disciplining? Hang in there!

Dove - posted on 07/20/2016




The problem isn't w/ the 7 year old child. The problem is w/ your husband. HE is the one that needs to step up and parent or allow you to do so. I don't care who's kid she is... if she had knocked over my little kid like that she'd be finding herself in time out and losing some privileges. If her father doesn't like that... he can take his daughter to work w/ him.

This child is not tearing apart your relationship. This child is being a normal child from a broken home w/ no stability and boundaries.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms