should I let my 11 year old date?
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Chet - posted on 06/12/2014
I am all for age appropriate interaction between boys and girls. In my mind, it really depends on what she thinks dating is.
I don't believe in banning dating, boyfriends, interaction with the opposite sex, etc before a certain magical age. That runs the risk of forcing kids underground, or creating the expectation that they will date, or should have a boyfriend, when they reach the magical age.
I think it's fine for an 11 year old to have a crush on another child who is in the same peer group. I think holding hands or having a first kiss when you're 11 or 12 is reasonable.
For girls, things like teen pregnancy, early sexual activity, promiscuous behaviour correlate very strongly with weak family relationships, poor self estimate and lack of education about sex.
I wouldn't say no dating. I would ask what she thinks dating is. I would find out what she wants to do and I would discuss with her if that is age-appropriate.
Jodi - posted on 06/12/2014
It's also not necessarily about trusting or not trusting her. Do you trust everyone? Sorry, I wouldn't trust anyone and everyone with my 11 year old daughter, and that is why she will not be dating in the near future. I agree that anyone who allows their 11 year old to date is off their rocker.
â« Shawnn âªâ«â« - posted on 06/11/2014
Well, I think you're off your rocker. As I said, in my opinion, (and with my own kids) 11 is NOT an appropriate age to be going out alone, or even on unsupervised group outings.
But, also as I said, I'm not you, so do what you want. HOWEVER do not be surprised when she shows up pregnant here in a couple of years, if you decide to be this lenient now.
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