Should I let my 6 year old son see his father???

Nicolene - posted on 03/13/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




I have a 6 year old with a long term boyfriend/ best friend. Like the old story most woman get to face; as soon as I told him I am expecting he ran for his life. He was on and off in NJ's life but we worked on it and we bacame good friends again, I never had a problem with him helping me with the financial goods for NJ but there where days NJ did not want to visit him because he was so off and on in outr lifes.

In the mean'time i got maried 11 April 2011 and so did he, NJ did not like he's new wife and sometimes refused to visit and I forced NJ to visit as I thought it's the way it should be. Then he got divorced and maried another lady, now NJ doesn't like her at all, his dad use to force him from me and it just started to kill me from inside. I stopped it and ealised maybe there is something wrong on that side. So I took my child to a very good social worker in our town and she said he's dad is a outsider in his eyes....

We started to work on a program for his dad to win his trust again. And he just started to stop paying maintenance or any expenses . He use to help me with all expenses.

Sometimes NJ will ask for his dad and I will phone him to come and pick him up but other times he doesn't want to go and cries out to me. What should I do???? Please help !!!!!


Louise - posted on 03/13/2012




I think it is important to maintain a relationship with his father because as your child gets older he will have many questions that you alone can not answer. A relationship does not have to be a physical contact one. Set up skype on your computer and let your child talk that way one to one with his dad. Dad could just read a story or listen about your childs day.

You do not have to force your child to go and see him just switch on the computer. The dad does have to make an effort here though as a relationship is something that needs to be nurtured.

As for the financial sides of things he should pay, whether he is visiting or not. If he continues to welch on his agreements then worn him you will take him to court if he does not pay up. The threat of this should be enough!

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