should I separate or divorces?

Alison - posted on 08/14/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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About 4 months ago I separated from my husband of 6yrs (know each other for 8yrs). We have a 3 yr old son who is with me full time as my husband moved out of state back to his parents. I filed divorce papers a while back then we got talking decided maybe would give our marriage another try and when we go to court I'd change to separation. Well my husband has come up one to twice a weekend per month. Every time he comes up he either has me or someone else around to help him out. So I never really get a break for myself.which my husband doesn't think I need one anyways. Recently I've been thinking twice about change paperwork to a separations. my son is very hyperactive and his dad has no patience and gets easily annoyed. A few events that accrued to make me think twice is, we were in a store and my son kept leaning on his dad's leg while he was looking at shirts. His dad asked him 3 times to stop leaning on him when my son didn't then his dad put hand on side of son's head to push him away and walked out of the store. We then left too and went home. When my son saids daddy too much, his dad asks WHAT each time by the 10th time of saying daddy, his dad raises his voice and saids stop saying daddy or WHAT really loud which makes our son cry. My husband has told me that our son is a needy bastard sometime...I replied no so. most recently miles was spending time in the bedroom talking with his dad and rolling a play ball across the floor..being active..anyways his dad got annoyed and said Goodbye, left the room to bathroom. My son came out crying saying daddy just said good bye... Once husband came out of bathroom told me he was going hit the road. I said ok as I was about to kick him out for just wanting to either lay in the recliner or bed instead of spending time with son. After husband left he text me that he was about to put our son through the wall..granted nothing happened but now I don't feel comfortable leaving him alone with his son. We go to court next week for child support/custody. Am I wrong to ask for supervised visits and for son's dad to seek some kind of help. Also am I a bitch for saying that I love you and want to try to fix our marriage but now I've changed my mind to just get divorce? It is less stressful life when it's just my son and me. Sorry for the book..please advices

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Alison - posted on 08/14/2012

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Yes I still have the text...Im representing myself as I don't have any money for a lawyer.

Dove - posted on 08/14/2012

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I sure hope you kept that text. Go for supervised access and have your lawyer demand that he get anger management asap.

Alison - posted on 08/14/2012

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Thank you...i'm looking out for my son's best interest but I'm also done with going along with things.. instead finally standing up for what I want.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2012

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You have been separated for quite some time now, and obviously the marriage is not going to be fixed by this point. I would personally end it so I could move on.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/14/2012

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I would definitely divorce him and go for supervised visits.

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