Since I have had kids I have become a major Hypochondriac. It is driving my husband and mom crazy. Any tips on how to get over this problem?

This conversation has been closed to further comments

15 Comments

View replies by

Nina - posted on 04/24/2013

4

0

1

Hi, I've been dealing with health anxiety also ever since my son was born. I just can't stand the thought of dying and leaving my baby boy, husband, and the rest of my family.
It all started when I was driving home from work and I noticed that I had a lump under my chin and I freaked out. I got home and started to google the symptoms and all the bad things came up and freaked me out. Stuff like thyroid cancer, lymphoma, esophagus cancer came up. I had a CANKER sore in my gum at the time and my husband was convincing me that it was from that but I didn't believe him. I cried my eyes out thinking I was about to die that night. I had my stepdad call in antibiotics for me that night and began taking it. Well my issue got worst because I still had the thought of having thyroid cancer in my head. My co-worker was telling me that her husband's friend just found out that he has thyroid cancer and that his symptoms were numbness in his legs and also seeing double. I freaked out and all of the sudden I felt like my legs were going numbed.
Then I went to a meeting and the speaker said her mom died from melanoma cancer and I came home and started googling what it was and I remembered that I had 3 spots appeared on my neck not too long ago. I was freaking out and obsessing over it. It was my mom's birthday and we went out to dinner with the whole family but I couldn't keep my mind off of it. I was on my phone the whole time obsessing over it. It was killing me I was depressed and the worst thing was that it was over the weekend and all the dermatologists were closed. I called and got an appointment first thing Monday morning. I went to the appt and had the derm take a look at it and he said it's nothing cancerous, it's just a scar. I was relieved.
I went back to focus on my "thyroid" I went to several doctors so they could feel my throat and search for lumps but they did not find anything. I was still not convinced. I did lab work to check for my tsh level and it came back normal. I was kind of relieved for a while. Until I found out that your tsh level could be normal and you could still have thyroid cancer. I somehow stopped talking about it so much and stopped asking my husband and mom to feel my neck even though deep down inside I was still scared. I started focusing on my VISION. I was seeing line floaters ever since I was pregnant and I didn't really pay attention to it until NOW. This is my current problem. I went to an optometrist even though I was scared to go. After researching about it I decided to just go because I don't want a retinal detachment and go blind. She dilated my eyes and said that she didn't expect this much floaters for someone my age, and that we should monitor it and if I see flashes or a curtain coming down in my vision that I should go to a retina surgeon. That freaked me out so I went to a different optometrist. I hope that it's just anxiety playing tricks on me because I'm constantly freaking out about my vision. Also right now I'm having throat pain =( They said it's because of spring allergies. I don't know what to do. I'm constantly feeling my throat and staring into blank walls to see what will show up in my vision. I'm looking for a psychiatrist too so I can stop with all of this.

April - posted on 02/06/2009

222

15

24

why are you scared to see your doctor? I urge you to do it!! you are NOT the only person who suffers from this, and most doctors have seen it before, mine was especially helpful in getting me the help I need. I was afraid that I was going crazy and they would put me away somewhere, but your body is responding normally to flight/fight instincts, and that is not the same as mental problems-you can also check out books to understand anxiety from your library.

April - posted on 02/06/2009

222

15

24

i'm glad you asked her that! my faith in God has helped me so much with my anxiety and panic disorder, because my worrying makes me feel that I am not putting enough trust in Him! my pastor assured me to take it to the cross, but also that there was something going on that I needed counseling for-I am thankful every day, even when I'm struggling!

April - posted on 02/06/2009

222

15

24

I have suffered from anxiety since I was young, and recently got counseling because it was interfering with everything in my life-it has gotten worse since I had kids, there are a lot of scary things out there and it seems like anything could happen. I even questioned my seemingly strong faith because I felt like I was not putting trust in God. I spoke to my pastor and my doctor. write these questions down whenever you are getting anxious :

!. what am I really scared of right now.(I worry about getting sick/dying)

2. make it a statement(I will get sick)

3. what are the odds of this really happening? ( I had a recent checkup with a clean bill of health, so the odds are slim that I am sick)

4. If the worst happens, what will I do to cope?



It is helpful to think through your worries, and put them in perspective.it also makes you more in control (#4) because you have a plan to cope. I hope this helps some-hang in there!

Ashley - posted on 02/06/2009

858

17

40

i am actually really glad that you posted this melisssa. this is exactly how i am too!!.....i constantly feel my body for lumps and sometimes yes i do find one but i dig deep into my body and i will feel a gland or something and i do the same thing. i get my mom, sister, husband, whoever to feel it and i will not leave it alone. well becausei dont leave it alone i irritate it and make it bigger so i think i'm dying of cancer. once i leave it alone it goes down and it's fine. recently my back has been sore. i've been thinking the same thing..omg i have cancer in my back. i've always had a bad back for as long as i can remember. we had a really old mattress, just moved, pregnant, and i have an 8 month old son that wants to be held a lot. not realising that all of those things ijust listed are probably the reason as to why my back is sore i automatically freak out and think i'm going to die. i was freaking out a couple months ago over moles that i have on my arms. i am very fair skinned so some of my moles are pink. i have also had them forever. i stared at them and poked at them so much to me they actually looked like they were growing. i used to cry myself to sleep thinking i had skin cancer. i ended up focusing on something else wrong (my neck). and forgot about the moles. i now look at them and they are the exact same size they were 6 months ago. i just recently had a paps test almost 3 wks ago. i made myself sick (literally sick) over this paps test. everyday i sit here and think the phone is goin to ring and their going to tell me i have cervical cancer. everytime the phone rings i get super sick to my stomach and weak. it always ends up being my mom, husband, or sister but i have myself convinced it's the dr. the day after i got my paps test done i cried and cried all day. i would look at my son and just bawl. if i lean up against something hard (like a counter) and it hurts my ribs or arms i freak out thinking it's bone cancer. it's not fun to be like this. i dont want to be like this but how do u stop it?!?.....and same thing with my family cancer doesnt really run in the family. the ones that have died from cancer arent blood related. my grandmother is a survivor of breast cancer but she was taking hormone pills because of menopause and that's what caused her breast cancer (i'm not saying that because it doesnt run in the family my chances are less). sorry i dont have any tips on how to get over it because i would like to know as well!!.....i need to learn to just live my life and not worry about these things because the more i worry about them the less fun i will have in life and i def want to enjoy my children!..not wake up every morning thinking that i'm dying with something!!

Michelle - posted on 02/06/2009

65

26

8

Melissa,

My first quesstion to you is are you religious? I actually have a few questions for you and would love to help you, however it would be nice to do this more one on one. Email me at michellenj@gmail.com

[deleted account]

Have you talked to your OB/Gyn about these feelings or your general doctor?  It could definitely be a hormone thing?  After you have kids everything gets wacked out, especially hormones, and maybe this anxiety is symptoms from this.  Definitely something to check out. 



Also, I think after we have kids, the reality that something could happen to us and knowing that we do not want to leave our children becomes something that is very scarey.  Before kids, it was just ourselves to look after and I don't want to downplay life but for some reason life just seems so much more important after having your own children.  You have someone to live for and the thought of leaving our kids is very scarey.  At least that is how I feel about it.  So, I do not think you are alone. 



I have worked in the medical field and am now going to school to become an RN, so knowing all I know about medical is even scarier for me because I try to diagnose myself all the time and, like you, always come up with the worst thing possible.  In your case though, maybe to the extent of how obsessed you get about it may be something you want to talk to your doctor about.  Also, never, ever be too scared to talk to your doctor.  That is what they are there for.  Tell them your symptoms, not what you have diagnosed yourself as, and let them come up with a diagnosis, even if it is nothing, to help calm your nerves.  It is almost like once you think you have something those symptoms get 10x worse because you are so focused on them.  Let your doctor ease your mind and I swear the symptoms will subside, if not cease.  My doctor is a female in womens health at our clinic and I don't know about you but I just relate better to a female doctor, always have, and I feel like they truly understand these type of problems because they have been there in some way, shape or form.  So, if that is your problem that you don't have the appropriate doctor to talk to, maybe think about switching to someone you are comfortable with?  You need to be able to live your life free (or at least at a tolerable level) from the anxiety that you are feeling now.  You deserve it, your kids deserve it and your loved ones deserve it.  Good luck to you!

Amanda - posted on 02/05/2009

38

18

6

wow, you sound like i did this summer i had the same worries but you know, I prayed, and prayed and than one day i was ok. But i always think of positive things, but when i had that i had went into the dr. office many times and the cause of most your problems is that you are stressed but you are stressing about the wrong things, and you need to gain that wait for the little one and for yourself, i am sure you are very healthy and you just need to focus on what you do have and it looks like you have two beautiful girls and one one the way, and my pa always told me don't worry about things until you need to, there's no reason for it. think of positive things, and eat, but stick to the healthy food, and start gaining wait or you will be hurting more trust me, and it's a real bumber, if your not that far already, but get those thoughts out of your head and focus on the good, and you'll come out of it. amanda

Lori - posted on 02/05/2009

9

31

0

Melissa - I have been struggling with the same exact thing. My daughter is 3. About 2 years ago, I started to have a pain in my left calf - convinced myself it was a blood clot. I went to the doctor, she examined, took an ultrasound, definitely NOT a blood clot, it was due to a near fall several days before that I overlooked. Then, a few months later, in addition to my high blood pressure, obesity, and borderline diabetic and high cholesterol, I start having chest pains. Clearly, I think it's a heart attack. I finally go to the ER and they rule it out. I am obviosly freaked out in the ER and crying and I started to realize that my most terrifying fear is to orphan my daughter. You hear so many horror stories of children losing their mothers at such early ages and so many stories of "they had these symptoms and the doctors never caught the disease". So, time goes by, and I realize that my chest pains were in different places - some were muscular and due to my new excercise routine, some were in my breasts - which, obviously should be cancer, right? Nope. Just around my period and ovulation - just hormones according to my gyn. There have been other "scares", I think the most recent being colon cancer...



The most important thing I did was 1 - go on an anti-anxiety pill (I was having other symptoms of anxity and panic attacks as well) so I take Zoloft daily and Xanax as needed. And the 2nd thing I do is I talk to my friend who is also a hypochondriac of sorts and we can reassure each other that it's not cancer. My 3rd piece of advice is to trust your PCP or find one you trust who isn't afraid to order tests to rule things out. Knowledge is power. And it's ok to be freaked out about getting sick and orphaning your children. What's not ok is to let it interfere with your time you DO have with them. If you get so worked up about physical symptoms, then you are not going to be able to enjoy the time you have with them and that is what is MOST important to you and them at ANY age.

Michele - posted on 02/05/2009

48

6

5

Has someone in your life died from cancer recently? Or have you watched a lot of shows on cancer?

Linda - posted on 02/05/2009

34

6

1

Everything that you are feeling is phsycosematic. You are creating all of your own terrible energy. Do you know how Cesar Melan (The Dog Whisperer) talks about energy and positiveness in dogs. I am sorry to relate your situation to this but it is so similar. your energy and stress build-up is effecting everything in your life. IE..your children, your husband...more than likely your relationship. And especially your unborn child. I have two children myself. 3 1/2 and 8 mo. I very much believe that your stress levels have everything to do with everything in your life. When i was pregnant, both times i just put it in my brain that nothing was going to bother me. I would have the occasional glass of wine, and recieve alot of grief for that. Oh well, I know my body. If that relieves my stress,if that is what makes me feel okay. Well then that is all that matters. You need to take care of yourself first. Be in tune with your inner self.



I hope that something that i said helped you out a bit. Let me know about the birth of your next child.



Linda

Melissa - posted on 02/05/2009

0

0

1

And the worse thing about all of this is that cancer doesn't run in my family really at all. I have a great aunt (dads side) who recently passed from a brain tumor which spread and another great aunt (moms side) who had skin cancer but fought it and won. As far as I know that is all that is in my family.

Melissa - posted on 02/05/2009

0

0

1

And the worse thing about all of this is that cancer doesn't run in my family really at all. I have a great aunt (dads side) who recently passed from a brain tumor which spread and another great aunt (moms side) who had skin cancer but fought it and won. As far as I know that is all that is in my family.

Melissa - posted on 02/05/2009

0

0

1

I am TERRIFIED of cancer. Every little symptom I get of anything brings me right to cancer. For example I get canker sores on my tongue and have for as long as I can remember and right now I have one but it is bigger than normal so I am freaking out about oral cancer. I keep whining to my mom and having my husband look a t my tongue constantly. Deep down I know that I am probobly being ridiculous, but I cannot help the fear and anxiety. I get a sore throat and my first thought is throat cancer, a muscle spasm in my breast, breast cancer. etc. I go for my yearly physocals and so far have not had any problem, but when things like this occur I am too scared to go to a doctor cause I am scared that it will be bad news.



Right now I am a little worse than usual. I am 8 months pregnant and haven't gained a pound in over 3 months. that is when I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes so diet has DRASTICALLY changed, and I am sure that is why I haven't gained any more weight cause my belly has gotten bigger but I have lost weight in other areas such as my thighs and face. But I still can't help but to think that cancer is an underlying condition to my lack of weight gain. And the anxiety is driving me crazy, but yet I am too scared to go see my doctor.

Michelle - posted on 02/05/2009

65

26

8

I am sorry but could you elaborate on this a little more when you say Hypochondriac what is it that you are doing that is driving them crazy. If you would like post on my wall and we can talk that way.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms