T - posted on 10/31/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )
I am where a single mother of a 17 year old boy. Lately, there has not been a night or a weekend where I have not gone to bed and literally cried myself to sleep. We live in a one-bed flat. He has the only bedroom and I have a sofa bed in the living room. This is the way it has been all his life and I am quite happy with the way we live. Its small, cosy and ours!! I don't complain and he has his space. He attends college full time and has a part-time job so he is learning and earning!!!... His father left me when I was pregnant with my son, but he has never shown any indication that he is even remotely interested in his father. He speaks to me now as though he is my husband. He expects and complains about everything. I work really hard full-time but I am also really tired at the end of the day/week. Lately we do nothing but bicker and shout at one another. I thought I had done a good job considering I was left to do it on my own but now Im not so sure. Maybe I have been a bad parent,, although it would not be for the want of trying. I have even taken to praying becos Im grasping at anything that might make things better but this feeling of helplessness is so overpowering that sometimes I actually go to bed at night and hope I don't wake in the morning!! I long to be happy again but don't know how to get out of this black hole. Has anyone else ever felt like this???