Sister in law from hell, help

Hanin - posted on 10/31/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




This is my first time posting, I have a major problem. I Have a sister in law from hell, he literally tries to start problems between myself and my husband about what religon my kids will be. I am muslium and my husnband believes in god but doesnt practice. I meet him when i was young and got married and now i have 2 kids but now i am coming into my faith. Long story short, his sister doesnt mind her own business she is concered about everything else except her own kid. She gets on my nerves and she has talked about me millions of times and her own family tells me about it. Do you think i am wrong her telling her to keep her religon to her self and not preach it to my kids? I dont preach to hers about my religon, and it has started a big arugment. Not between me and hubby beacause we agreed on raising kids musilium and none of his family practice. To make it worse we moved in with his families house due to finicical problems and me in school for nursing.. the problem is his sister that lives 30 milies away and her mom takes her side when she starts crying n i am sick of it. Should i move me and my children with my father?i am sick of my sister in laws b s for 3 years, every month its somethings.


Ariana - posted on 10/31/2012




Has your husband said or done anything about this? In general it's up to each person to deal with their family (so your husband deals with problems in his family and you deal with the problems from your family). You should get your husband to talk to your sister-in-law and tell her that she is not allowed to try to convert your children or talk about religion near them. She is also not to talk to him or you about religion. It's not up to her what religion your and his children are. If she continues to speak to you/him/your children about these things she will not be speaking to the kids or you and your husband. There has to be boundaries and it's up to him to create those.

If you don't want to go to that extreme you can also try shutting her down by giving her the same response every time she brings it up (you and your husband and your children if they're older). We're bringing the children up muslim. We're brining the children up muslim. Any time she argues, speaks of it, tries to change your mind say that. NOTHING ELSE. Don't argue, don't explain, don't even tell her to mind her own business. If you say 'we're bringing the children up muslim' over and over and she NEVER not once gets a different response she will get frustrated and probably storm off and give up. If she doesn't give up at least you'll have the satisfaction of knowning that you are standing your ground and your answer is never changing. For this to work you and your husband both need to use the same response and never change it. It's the easiest way to shut someone down. If your children are older and she tries talking to them about it tell them to say the same thing if she brings it up.

Wish those people you just need to shut them down when they bring something you don't like up. If she starts an argument with you walk away, it takes two people to keep an argument going. You do not need to be around this person if you don't want to and you don't need to take and flack from her either. If she is treating you in a negative way or keeps brining something up that you've already discussed and you aren't talking about anymore walk away.

I would have your husband be the one who does the most talking and the one figuring out how to deal with this. It's his family after all so he's the one who should be handling it.

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