So worried we'll be ignored as grandparents...

Cynthia - posted on 11/14/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )




Our adult kids are good-hearted, but at that stage in life (and spread out around the world) where they are so busy with careers that we rarely hear from them. It terrifies me that this will morph into them being so busy with their children (we aren't quite there yet) that we'll all wake up ten years from now when it's essentially too late, realizing shoulda-woulda-coulda. I neither sit passively by, nor smother, but I don't feel satisfied. I have the time and interest to give, but when there is no response - no thanks, no mention of "oh, that thing you sent sure was great", not even a cursory connection month after month after month - my thinking now is to stop and wait for them to reach out and I find that depressing. I have to say that one of our children is great about trying to stay connected, but that also has the effect of making the lack of communication from the others seem worse. I know I'm not expressing this very clearly, but I'm very interested to hear from others about strategies that have worked for you to create and maintain connections with adult children and grandchildren who are spread out and busy. In particular, if you are a "maker", how do you deal with the urge to make things when you get no feedback as to whether they are wanted or appreciated?


Dove - posted on 11/14/2014




Why not write a monthly letter to your grandchildren. Send them little gifts (stickers, gift card, whatever is small and cheap to send that they like), etc....

My grandma on my dad's side had 11 grandchildren and she sent every one of them something for birthday and Christmas every year w/out fail whether she heard from them all year or not. My grandma on my mom's side always wanted to hear back and get a thank you or... something. Can you guess which grandma had unconditional love and was adored by all....? ;)

1 Comment

View replies by

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms