Son 25 just got married, Big Mistake!

Joyce - posted on 10/12/2014 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My son just got married a week ago. My gut told me he was making the wrong decision, however, he got married anyway. Now he is barely speaking to me and avoiding me at all costs. How do I move on and not worry about him, knowing that he made a mistake?

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Dove - posted on 10/12/2014

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Maybe he's avoiding you cuz you told him he was making a mistake.... It's his life to live, not yours. It's been a WEEK. Is it not possible that he's busy spending time with his new bride as he should be?

After my brother got married all I heard about it from my mom was what a waste of money she spent on a mistake (yes, it ended up BEING a mistake, but it was his to make and they were married for quite a few years first) and all this other nonsense about the wedding and the marriage.... I didn't even invite her to MY wedding because of it.

You have to let your son live his life and just be there to love and support whatever life choices HE makes (barring anything illegal).

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 10/14/2014

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Well, lets see...I avoided speaking with or interacting with my family members that chose to be hurtful, rather than supportive of my marriage choice...so I'm thinking that, perhaps he's chosen to limit his contact with you to minimize your hurtful criticisms of his ADULT DECISIONS!

Besides that, they're just married! I don't think I know ANYONE that went out of their way to contact their parents during their honeymoon...well, except maybe those Duggar kids, but they're brainwashed to the point of being sheep rather than individuals.

Your son and his wife made a decision to spend their lives together. They didn't ask for your opinion, because you didn't have a say in the decision one way or the other, and if you continue to put down your son's choice of life partner, don't be surprised if he completely severs contact with you. You can either be an adult, accept his choices, and BE HAPPY for them, or gracefully bow out now.

After 25 years with my husband, my mother STILL points out what a 'mistake' we made. I'm not sure HOW we made a mistake...except that my husband isn't a millionaire, he's not a famous intellectual scholar, nor household name...He's just an ordinary 'joe'. Maybe she had higher hopes for herself that she thought I'd fulfill. I don't know, but whatever. She made a choice, 25 years ago, to criticize my adult choices, so I made a choice to minimize contact.

Beverley - posted on 10/12/2014

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you know what we mothers have to accept when our children reaches adult hood that we have to butt out of their business despise what our gutts tells us. we raise them to be adults. and being an adult means taking responsibility for our life and choices we make... so sister if you continue to meddle in a negative way you will receive the negativity in a different manner...as you said he's not talking to you.. there is a saying what you sow you reap...advice for you.. let the newly weds enjoy their honeymoon and marriage...i'm sure they both love you but if you keep up with your negative behaviour..you'll lose both of them..this may be hard for you to accept but you have too.that's the way life is..good look to both you and the newly weds

Tia - posted on 10/12/2014

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Hi Joyce , Your Son Will Soon Realize Wither He Made A Good Or Bad Decision as time Moves On Dont Worry , He Will Learn From His Mistakes Also If U Talk To Him About Him Ignoring U Maybe u Guys can Work it Out , Good Luck !

Sarah - posted on 10/12/2014

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A week after my wedding I wasn't talking to anyone either! But I was enjoying my husband and all of the good stuff that comes with getting married. Is it possible your son is just enjoying his bride?
He is a grown man, you can't do anything about his choices except accept them. Be there for him when he need you and otherwise try to be excited for him. He is starting a new journey and if you wan to see potential grand-kids, you might want to reach out to the happy couple!

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