Son does not care

CELESTE - posted on 05/08/2015 ( 6 moms have responded )

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HOW DO I GET MY 13YR OLD SON TO CARE ABOUT HIMSELF, CARE ABOUT SCHOOL AND TO STOP BEING DISRESPECTFUL. HE DOES NOT CURSE OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT BUT HE LIES FOR NO REASON. I DON'T WANT TO GIVE UP ON MY SON BUT IT'S KILLING ME THAT HE IS THIS WAY. WHAT CAN I DO?

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Morgan - posted on 05/09/2015

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HI...yes. my daughter too spoiled by him...she has been through so much...honestly he blatantly teaches her disrespect and DENIES it. we are divorced. we moved out and came back...shortly will be out the door-for good this time. anyway. just remember it does take time. this has been going for most of her life...I've changed and now I see things differently which has been the most important thing in growing and developing my daughter. her grandparents spoil her too because they feel bad for everything she has and is going through but i am okay with that because that is what grandparents are for. it is so hard. I cannot change him. I cannot get him see his words/actions are really at the heart of the matter. i guarantee we have different circumstances but kids are smart and will come to understand later in life the real truth....i am sure a much better mother you give yourself credit for....and these forums will help you get through it...what is better than others' experiences to help guide you!! :)

CELESTE - posted on 05/08/2015

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Yes I really need to get him some therapy because sometimes I think its because his dad is gone he acts this way, but he talks to him all the time but things are not getting though to him. I know he has to respect me first it starts at home and I'm working on that because me and him don't have that son mother relationship like him and his dad his dad was more buying him things all the time never letting him earn them and doing things for him so I have been the one trying to show him to do things and he is so lazy I hate it. He gets better for a minute then he goes right back.

Morgan - posted on 05/08/2015

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I agree Hormones?? Or Yes--you need to get your son to open up and talk to someone--like a "safe" place--group (some kind), counselor, anyone he would trust. I have a 9 your old daughter--we have been through a lot...no joke. She is disrespectful for a long time--do not have a problem with lying just her behavior...I do not want to disclose anything to personal...but she lately there is improvement...she is in therapy. but what I have learned is--it is mostly based on me...the better I have been feeling and doing the better she has--my internal self-worth, etc...not saying this is from you...just my personal experience...mother/daughter relationship...

Dove - posted on 05/08/2015

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Add to everything else you said AND his dad is in jail? Since when? What for? When will he be released? Your son absolutely needs some help and guidance and a positive male role model in his life... the sooner the better.

CELESTE - posted on 05/08/2015

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That's so true I think he needs to open up he keeps everything inside, I know one thing might be that his father is not here right now (in jail) and I know he miss him but I always tell him to make your dad proud so when he calls I can give him a good report on you instead of him always telling him he messed up but he just does not get.

Dove - posted on 05/08/2015

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If he doesn't care about himself or school and he is disrespectful and lying... he needs some help. Something must be going on w/ him... rather it is hormones, trouble at school, depression, etc.... Maybe talk to his school guidance counselor and see if they would try and help you get him to open up.

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