Son in jail

Wanda - posted on 06/28/2016 ( 20 moms have responded )

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My son is in jail for 6 month how do I get through it

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Sarah - posted on 06/30/2016

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Day for day is when you serve one day but get credit for two. If he has good behavior, he may only have to serve 3 months. Since I don't know what happened and I don't need too know either, I can't say whether or not letting him off would have benefited him or given him a sense of being able to get away with poor choices. At this point, harboring resentment will not help you or him, moving forward and helping him look towards the future is really all you can do.

Sarah - posted on 06/29/2016

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Wanda, I know you love your son and you wanted to help him stay out of jail. Paying back the family does not change what he did and if he did not have a consequence, who knows what his next choice may have been? Better 6 months than 6 years. Will he serve the full term or can he do day for day?

Kathy - posted on 06/28/2016

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Wanda-
My son too is in jail. It has been 10 months. Next week he will be arraigned and I suspect he will receive 2-7 years. I cry and feel guilty. I failed him somehow, but I know I did the best I could and I loved him unconditionally. He made a bad choice of which I cannot blame myself. Continue to love him as you always have. It is not an easy road. Remember God is best able to reach into someone's heart when they are at there lowest. Pray for God to reach into your son's heart, forgive him and rebuild him. Be kind to yourself.

Sarah - posted on 06/28/2016

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You write to him, pray for him and prepare yourself to not enable him to continue doing whatever landed him there in the first place.

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Michelle - posted on 07/04/2016

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Wanda: I am sorry for your loss but we had no idea of the state of mind your son was in. No one here could have told you that would happen because you never mentioned you were worried he would take his life.
Please don't tell people to keep their comments to themselves, this is an open international forum and we can only comment on what you tell us.

Wanda - posted on 07/03/2016

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To all the mom who have children in jail do not give up on them do not stop loving them and do not be so quick to judge them ,make sure they know you love them in spite of what they have done to cause them to be in jail. Life is short and you never know if it will be the last time you see are talk to them. I wish you all the best of luck with you kids.

Wanda - posted on 07/03/2016

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As I said I was not making him out as a victim. In the future keep you advise and opinions to your self unless you know the details he was my only child and I new his state of mine.

Wanda - posted on 07/03/2016

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Yes that is why I was trying to get him transfered to the trustee program I was not making him to be a victim but new his state of mine.

Wanda - posted on 07/02/2016

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I do not want are ask you to emphasize with me. I only wanted to save his life because ii knew he was on the verge of taking his on life. But i was too late, in the future keep your opion and advice to your self now i pray he rest in peace

Wanda - posted on 07/01/2016

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Its been 12 days since he went to jail. He called last night. They have not moved him into the trustee program and he sounded so bad. How are where do you find the words to encourage

Sofia - posted on 06/30/2016

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No one said turn your back on him. But I'm sorry, I can't really empathize with you. Good Luck

Wanda - posted on 06/30/2016

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Do you have a child in jail, first i am not making him out to be a victim. He is doing the time but i will not turn my back on him. Everyone deserves a second chance. Perhaps you should become a therapist since you seam to be able to make recommendations without all the facts

Sofia - posted on 06/30/2016

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Hmmm,
Don't enable him by making him out to be a victim. That will make it much worse for his future. He did the crime and is doing time. Perhaps this is a time for you to go to therapy to help yourself and not a time to join forces with him to find ways to get out faster. He needs to learn some lessons

Wanda - posted on 06/30/2016

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He has signed up for the trustee program i think this is the same thing but has not been moved yet. I pray he gets moved soon and can start to earn credit

Wanda - posted on 06/30/2016

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New at this an i do not know what day for day is. I know he has to have consequences but where does the forgiveness and second chances come in he my brother did much worse to dad and my daddB did not press charges on him

Wanda - posted on 06/29/2016

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Does it get any easier. I do love him and it breaks my heart to see and know he is in jail. I had offer to repay a family member for what he took and they would not agree. Now the relationship and family is also broken i truly know God is able but i cannot find him in this. Life doesnot have any meaning to me anymore

Wanda - posted on 06/28/2016

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Thanks for the response. I have prayed so much for him do not even know what to pray for. I feel like my life is over and that I have failed

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