spoiled baby

Ronnita - posted on 02/01/2009 ( 10 moms have responded )

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My son is 4 months and when I put him down he screams until I pick him up again no matter how long I lay him down. He was a colic baby so I held him all the time, now hes fine except he thinks I should be holding him all the time. Any suggestions on break the cycle. I cant get anything done with a baby in my arms constantly.

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Dawn - posted on 02/01/2009

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I agree with Leanna and Kate. My son does the same thing. I try to get him to be quiet or smiling before I pick him back up by playing with him. So he doesnt associate the crying to the pick up.



I am also a believer in wearing your baby. It does not take long before they are walking and entertaining themselves. I have 5 children and used this method with all of them.



I don't feel any of them are or were spoiled. They are very secure and independent now. Except for the 4 1/2 month old. lol He is still held.



I know this is not acceptable to all but it worked for me. It is not always convenient but the love I know he feels is far worth it. He does not cry to be spoiled, he cries to feel secure.

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Crystal - posted on 02/06/2011

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my 4 month old daughter cries to be held too, but she is becoming a little more independant - especially now that she has discovered how fun her feet are to play with :) I wear her when I vacuum and dust. I can't get close enough to the sink, but I put her in her swing where she can see me and I make lots of eye contact with her and talk to her. Sometimes I put on silly music - like my old "Letter People" records and sing along with them. She especially likes Miss A and the word "A-a-a-Choo!" and laughs. We finally got past the colic cuddling, now we are into teething cuddling! Make yourself comfy in a rocker and enjoy it the best you can. Too quickly she'll be off with her friends and have no time for you.

Ronnita - posted on 02/02/2009

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Thanks everyone for your advise.  I am using a little bit of everything.  I just get a little frustrated because the house is not as clean as I like and I don't no when  I will be going back to work.  I have a great baby sitter lined up but I don't know if she will enjoy holding him constantly he's 16 lbs.  He's a pretty big boy.

Kathy - posted on 02/01/2009

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I say hold him.  I have 4 kiddos, some wanted to be held more then others...find a comfortable sling and stick him in there.  I PROMISE it won't be forever.  Promise promise promise...and some day you will miss this stage. 



 



I 100% agree with the abover poster...he isn't spoiled...he just needs that closeness from you.  Some babies are like that. 

Janice - posted on 02/01/2009

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My daughter is 9 months as is the only one of my five children that was crying constantly to be picked up. I could not put her down and walk out of her sight without her screaming the house down. I tried everything- swings, bouncy chairs, music, jolly jumper, exersaucer, etc. and nothing worked. All of a sudden, about a month ago, everything changed. She is now content to sit and play or sit in her exersaucer and I can finally get things done. I think a lot of it is the babies personality. I finally gave in and started doing my housework and cooking early in the morning or later at night and cuddled with her when she wanted to. Good luck!

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That doesn't sound like much fun. Even if you know there's nothing wrong, it's not nice listening to a screaming baby. You could try a sling/carrier like Leanna suggested, then you have your hands free.



Not sure if you've already tried this, but it might work.  Put him in the chair or under the mobile/baby gym and play with him there. Then you can try leaving him for a few minutes, but still within sight, and talking to him etc. I guess the idea is that he knows you're still there, and gets used to being by himself for a while. And then try and stretch the time longer, and leave the room. It may be best to try it after a feed, when he's generally more content.

Amber - posted on 02/01/2009

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 I would just let him cry, he's going to be ok if you don't hold him, he'll get sick of crying and give up. Consistency is key though, you can't give in otherwise he'll think if he cries loud and long enough you'll pick him up, then he will cry for a long time. The first few times might be hard but just remember it's ok for babies to cry, it doesn't hurt them, it hurts us more, and you want him to start trying to be independent, he'll probably start crawling and walking before you know it, and then he can just follow you around :)

Leanna - posted on 02/01/2009

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I say put him in a front pack (if he isn't too heavy) and pack him around while you get things done. And enjoy this cuddly stage while you can, he wont want you to hold him forever. I at times get irritated when my little one wont let me get things done, but then I realize she wont be little for very long and I want to soak it all in while I still can. The dishes can wait a while longer!

Ronnita - posted on 02/01/2009

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Yes,  I've tried the vibrating chair with the distractions.  I also have one of those toys that has lites, music and a moble that hangs over him while hes laying on the floor.  I've also tried a swing.

Julie - posted on 02/01/2009

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Do you try different things to distract him? My son started wanting to be held all the time when he was about 2 months old. I finally found that he would sit quietly in one of those vibrating bouncy seats, it also had some toys hanging overhead and flashing lights with music. At first, it was only a few minutes at a time, but he started staying in it longer and longer, and then also laying on the floor, sitting in his car seat, or sitting in his high chair. I give him toys to play with, and he's learning to entertain himself.

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