Christina - posted on 09/29/2009 ( 29 moms have responded )
I am looking for some spiritual guidance! I know that when I took my husband back after all of the lies and deception, the affair(s), and so forth, he was a humble broken man that accepted everything that satan was willing to give him, he just didn't realize that God is on our side and he had to put a stop to te madness because my husband wasn't strong enough. Once my husband lost his job of 19 years over this behavior and our everything was at stake, including the future of our 5 children he was brought down to his knees and couldn't beleive what a rampage he was on. I have my own successful business THANKS BE TO GOD!!!! and it has kept us afloat. We just sent our second son off to college, and have a son and daughter in highschool, and our youngest daughter in 8th grade....it has definitely been the most difficult and emotionally trying situation that I have ever gone through in my life! The hurt and distruction, the disrespect and anger, the violence it brought out in my behavior towards him, and my self worth is gone. Now a year later we are dealing with a huge communication break down where he says all of the things that makes our counselor happy, however I know that these most charming leads are just words and very rarely will my husband follow them up with an action. He is all about the outward appearance. Not truly about building us or me back up, or our children and family unit. That is up to me to do. He walks around telling me what he shouldn't or should do to me behavior wise, he knows so much of how he should treat me, he just says he can't get there with his actions. He's scared. Any feedback on this would be wonderful. Deep down he is a great guy that has so much love and compassion to give, unfortunately I can't seem to see past all of my anger and hurt for more than a few days....I would like happy stories, that through the difficult and unbearable time, the times when everything looked bleek and pale, GOD showed up, and pulled everything that we have gone through together and molded into a new life full of new blessing and a whole new rlove and respect for each other.....and happy kids too=o) And one???? I don't doubt my God, I doubt my stregnth!