Nichole - posted on 06/06/2016 ( 3 moms have responded )
I have been a step mom to my 13 year old son for almost 9 years. At times he is very nice to my 5 year old daughter, but a lot of times he is really mean to her. I'm gonna give a little background first.
My step sons relationship with his bio mom was horrible. She lied to him, and used him to hurt his father. He would be aloud to sit in his room all day, alone to play video games, a lot of time missing school. After many many months/years of custody battle, his father was awarded 50/50. Well when that happened how bio mom split. We haven't heard a word from her. I have a son the same age as my step son, and during the years me and his father have had 2 girls together, 5 and 8 months. I have tried to bond with my step son to no avail. But that being said we do get along well. I have never been the punisher, and my family loves him too. We have always just treated him as if he was my bio son. I know he has resentment, and sadness and maybe anger about his bio mom. But lately I have been noticing him being very mean to his little sister. There are times he is really nice, and they get along really well, but more often than not he is mean. He will purposely lie to her, make her cry, and then laugh at her. I have tried so much, but I'm at the point where I have to tell her she's shouldn't play with him, or even be around him, and I'm not OK with that :(. I try to intervene and say that's not nice, that's not how we treat family, and have tried to explain to him that it can be damaging to her. I guess I'm just not sure what to do. I don't want to be the "evil step mom" but I have a duty to teach my daughter right and wrong. Any advice will help.