[deleted account] ( 6 moms have responded )
I have a stepchild who is 15. For 4 years we have had constant problems with her going behind our backs when it comes to boys. The rules are no dating or boyfriend til 16. This past summer we found out that she has been going behind our backs and seeing a guy we have forbid her to see. These times have been when she has been at her other parents home on their visitation. We found out she has had sex at the age of 14. We have sat down with the other parents and talked to them about what was going on. We came to an understanding that she would not be allowed access to a computer, ipad, ipod, phone or allowed to go anywhere with a boy. She was not to be left alone. ( We found out she had sent nude photos to this boy).
Now that 2 months have passed the other parent is allowing her to go to a boys house and hang out with him and another boy. THis was the problem to begin with she was allowed to go off with someone and the guy would show up. When questioned she said she didn't think it was a problem cause this guy was her best friend. I don't deny that they are probably only friends but what about the other guy who was there? All these boys are in the same circle.
I just have a hard time when rules are laid out they aren't followed and nothing ever happens to her as punishment. Her father says I can't control it over there but at what point should she be held accountable? She knew the rules, doesn't matter if she is friends with the one boy or not. THINGS HAPPEN!!!! She knows she is not suppose to be going over to any boys house but she does.
I am at my wits end cuz when I find these things out my 1st instinct is to let her father know and it just causes a big problem between me and him.
WHAT DO I DO?