Stopping visitation

Laura - posted on 05/17/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I got pregnant after a guy lured me in while I was intoxicated and then ejaculated in me while I was asleep. He later bragged about getting me pregnant. Anyways, I have an amazing daughter (2.5 mos) that I wouldn't trade for the world. However, I was just informed that this guy is going to put himself on child support so he can gain visitation. And here's the problem...after I found out I was pregnant, I did some research on this guy...and learned a few things.
To start with, at first I invited him to doctors appointments (before I was scared by all the info below). He didn't attend one. He would stay up til 4 am in his "rap studio" and not show up. He asked me for money multiple times so he could go party, he would show up at my house drunk, and he even discussed that he should be the main parent so we could get food stamps and money....? No.
To make matters worse....
He was arrested for lewd and lascivious behavior 2 years ago but it was plead down to a felony battery. Ew. Apparently he was naked with a 15 yr old. HOW would they lessen that charge? He is 27.
He sells drugs and does drugs. He loosely refers to it on twitter...his page is public.
His house is also his studio where he entertains the scum of our town. Real dangerous people known for drugs and violence.
His predator mentality doesn't stop at his previous charge...in the past year he has dated 3 girls that were fresh out of high school. These relationships are all openly volatile (again, on twitter) with some violence/property damage.

I am so scared that he will try and get visitation rights and something will happen to my baby in his care. She is my world!!

What can I do?? He is not on birth certificate, and doesn't have established paternity yet.

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He will have to go through court to get visitation, which means he will have to pay for and obtain a paternity test as well as all of his legal fees. You will have to pay for your own legal fees. By the way, he can sue for visitation without paying child support. If you want child support, that is separate, and you will have to take him to court for it, unless for whatever reason he just volunteers to pay it, which isn't likely.

My first question is why have you not filed charges against him for raping you? If he had sex with you without your consent, that is rape. You need to file charges. Unless you file charges, anything you say about how the child was conceived will not be admissible--meaning you don't get to tell the judge you got pregnant against your will.

Take screen shots of his twitter pages where he refers to drugs, violence or any other situation that would be unsafe for your child. Collect all of the evidence you can. DO NOT TELL ANYONE (Other than your legal counsel) that you are collecting evidence against him. You cannot spy on him or take pictures outside of public places, but he seems to keep enough public that you shouldn't have a hard time convincing the judge he's unfit to parent.

That said, why does he want visitation? From what you've described, he doesn't seem like the kind of guy who would enjoy working a child into his life.

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Laura - posted on 05/18/2013

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He didn't technically rape me. I consented at the start and then passed out. He is going to put himself on child support I think to make it easier for him to get visitation. Idk why he wants to get visitation so bad...except that he's looking to gain something from me and put on appearances for everyone else. Thanks for all the advice!!

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