support on abuse

Jessica - posted on 07/03/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I was recently physically abused by my husband, he was taken to jail and there was a no contact order put into place. I am filing for divorce on Thursday, and I feel like I am the bad guy. My twins who are 5 act just like there dad, he was also emotionally and verbally abusive too, and im at a loss of what to do. I get no help or support, and everyone is catering my ex. Im so confused on what I should do

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[deleted account]

Thanks, yeah I have more and more people that are supporting me and it helps tremendously that I can come here and talk....Perfect place where moms understand everything. Thanks guys!

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 07/06/2012

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You are exactly right, Jessica!

Do you have a support system for yourself that doesn't include his family? If so, that's awesome, and you should surround yourself with those people.

If not, use us. We're here. You can message me any time, and I'm sure that there are others (once they read this one) that will be more than happy to say the same :)

[deleted account]

That helps alot, so much and I called the counseling services today and gotta call back tomorrow, it's amazing what people find acceptable. I've dealt with this for 6 years, and I had quite a few emotional affairs, and totally wrong on my side, i made bad choices, but there were reasons. And it wasnt the first time he put his hands on me either, but it was far and few so I never picked up on it, it was a lot of verbal and emotional abuse. And then his family wants to say we can work through all this, we can work through the infidelity. To me abuse is a no go, and it doesn't deserve 2nd or more chances, he already had chance after chance for 6 years. And I sure as hell didn't do anything to deserve to be abused like that.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 07/03/2012

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You should KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK. Stick to your guns. Keep the proceedings going, keep the no contact order in place.

Repeat after me: I AM NOT THE BAD GUY. I AM NOT THE BAD GUY.

Because, Jessica, YOU ARE NOT THE BAD GUY. The bad guy in this situation is the scuzzbag that hit you, that emotionally abused you, and your kids.

Your kids are going to need attention. Counseling, if possible, especially if they're acting out. But you, lady, YOU ROCK. You are doing ABSOLUTELY the correct thing here. Those losers catering to your ex...well they can just jump off that cliff with him. They aren't your friends, nor your "family" if they're on his side.

If you need to vent, or anything, just message me.

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