Teacher called my 5 yr old a CRYBABY in class.

Karen - posted on 04/10/2012 ( 287 moms have responded )

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My 5 year old son came home from school today and told me his teacher called him a "Crybaby." She called on him to read in reading group in front of the other kids and he wasn't paying attention and lost his place in the packet. He began to cry.

I sent her an email and she said, (QUOTE, CUT and PASTED),

"I didn’t call him a crybaby. He started crying because he got behind due to the fact that he wasn’t listening and doing what he was supposed to. I made the statement that we do not have crybabies in our classroom but he has never been called one. That would be very unprofessional for me to call him or any other student a name. Thanks!" (END QUOTE)

MY RESPONS=

By using the word “crybabies,” it’s too close a reference in that context. It’s clear what you meant to say, but I would strongly suggest you not use that term in school. My son understood you to call him a crybaby and other students would as well. I do not wish to argue the fine points. Thanks! (END QUOTE)



What are your feelings and how would you handle this??? I now feel she is going to target him until the end of shoool year.

BTW.....This is the SECOND time this has happened!

SUGGESTIONS PLEASE?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Marie - posted on 04/10/2012

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First of all, he's five. Last time I looked, five year olds cry. They also get distracted. Heck, I'm 40 and I cry. I'd like to see her call me a crybaby.



Second of all, do not wait, go to the principal now. If we're going to put an end to bullying, there needs to be a zero tolerance with the teachers. End this before it escalates.

Kati - posted on 04/10/2012

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I would be at the school with her in the principals. I am guessing he is in kindergarten. This teacher is going to make a huge impact on how he feels about school & his teachers. If starts not liking school because he is afraid of what might be said about it you are going to have a child who will not excel. She needs to apologize to the whole class & maybe a suspension day with no pay will teach her to chose her words wisely.

Tiffany - posted on 04/10/2012

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That's terrible! It is really a rock/hardplace when you deal with teachers and their behavior. If you allow it you allow your child to be treated poorly, if you say something you risk them being singled out by the teacher in the future... I would suggest praying about it, a lot! That your words would be softened and sincere, and that the teacher's heart would be softened and her pride would shrink. She, really, should welcome criticism, so that she may become the best teacher she could possibly be. I hope you find peace down this path. Always be encouraging your child and telling them that not everyone is as sweet and kind as mommy and daddy are but teachers come in all forms and (aside from illegal, inappropriate behavior) they can learn from all personality types. It will make them a much more well-rounded adult ready for what the world has in store for them Make lemonade out of lemons~

Mindy - posted on 04/10/2012

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He's 5. Kid's don't gossip. Go to the principle and ask to have him moved to a different class for said reasons.

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CARRIE - posted on 05/15/2012

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I would take it above her. No one has the right to even say that name in reference to anything. Of course your Son thought it was directed at him. My feelings is, it was and she should be repremanded for that. A better way for her to have handled it was ... There is no reason to cry we will wait for you but next time pay attention. She needs to get off the play ground herself and use her big girl words.

Alie - posted on 04/15/2012

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As a teacher myself I can see where she's coming from, and also as a parent I understand your feelings. I would have done what you did and contact the teacher and express your feelings, but leave it at that. You've made your point to her, and she'll take that on board and if it were me, I'd remain professional and not allow it to happen again. Trust your child's teacher that she is doing her best for your son. If it happens a 3rd time, go and speak to her directly. All the best!!

Krista - posted on 04/15/2012

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Thank you, ladies, for all of your helpful responses. Seeing as the OP has not updated us in a few days, I'm going to lock this thread.

Krista E.
WTCOM Moderator

Alana - posted on 04/15/2012

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Follow your mommy instincts! Your child's self esteem means everything and he should know you are on his side. He comes first, that teacher said no crybabies allowed, which he knew was directed at him. See if you can get him moved to another class.

Sarah - posted on 04/15/2012

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I agree wholeheartedly with you. Name calling is an epic foul in my house, subject to the most severe repurcussions. Absolutely unacceptable. I love your response (including the "thanks!" at the end which smacks of a proper return of smartass attitude - nice work!). You are right. The inference is that he is a crybaby and she is completely out of line. I assume you talked to the principle about this? I'd write to the school board and file a complaint and I would also attempt to remove my child from her class. If the teacher is making comments like that, this is most likely not an isolated event. I'd be all up in it. You go!

Laetitia - posted on 04/15/2012

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depends of a lot of things: - Is it possible for you to change your son to another class? -if yes, what's the link between the actual teatcher and the next one? (could be worse if the's only 2 teachers in the school and they're best-frien-ever, imagine what the next one could do do defend his friend and proove you(-and other similar parents) was wrong?) - what's the reliation between school and public advice on school? (in my country it's usually a public school and they DO NOT really care of what parents things of their work)
If i were you i woukd just try to be logical (and not emotional):
what is excatly the problem to solve: this teacher wrong speack habits (or wrong way to consider other humans ) or the fact he is crual with your son?
If it's only the 3nd problem, it's most viable to solve than the other ones.

Jan - posted on 04/15/2012

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Moving him to another class may be hard on the child... New teacher and new classroom would be an adjustment . Talk to the teacher first... If not settled then continue to the principal. the teacher should always be willing to work with you. I have had many years in the kindergarten classroom. The pressure is big for both teacher and student. Expectations are higher than ever.

Wendy - posted on 04/15/2012

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As you have already talked to the teacher and do not feel it is resolved, I would suggest that you have a meeting with the principal. If you don't have any luck with that the next person to talk to would be the superintendent, after the superintendent your next a alternative would be going before the school board.

[deleted account]

I would not tolerate this behavior from any teaches, when kids learn from there actions. There are no fine lines here, She knew exactly what she was saying and whom she was addressing when she did it. I would go to the principle with my issue's of my concerns about what happened . I would also ask the principal to talk to the teacher to avoid conduct like this coming from her any more. If it continued I would have to take it to the school board. We have bully teachers in school as well as bully students. Both of them think they can get away with it.
Nip it in the Bud I would say...

Jackie - posted on 04/15/2012

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Sarah,
This teacher may be one who doesn't have enough patience to do her job. I know small children are distracted easily and so am I. I laugh alot and tell people, I have to keep my mind on many things and have for years, that I don't focus very well on one thing, just like the kids. Attention span grows as the child grows. A 4 or 5 year old probably can't attend for more than 5 minutes unless you change the activity or the focus at a pretty quick pace. You need visual or kenethetic sp? things for young children to focus on to keep their attention. When I read a book, I usually try to keep them engaged unless they get way off the subject and then I bring them back. I read to them because it is important at their age or any age, actually. I have thought about this and am not sure a reading group is appropriate for kindergarteners unless they are few in number and the teacher makes sure they are all on the same page. I do a four page flyer called Let's Find Out and we all do it together after seeing it on the smartboard. That is a challenge so I wonder how a reading group would work. Anyways, I didn't assume you don't volunteer but do know that many parents don't. It is a good thing to do, especially for a parent who wants to see what is really going on in that classroom on a daily basis. I always welcome volunteers because with 20 4-year olds, my aide and I can always use help. My children have many needs and I don't like anything to be overlooked but it happens sometimes. Sometimes, they have to wait a couple extra minutes to get their pants zipped or their shoe tied but we do it as quick as possible. I definitely would've apoligized to the child and have done that before. I don't ever remember using the term crybaby but my kids sure have and I corrected it and used more appropriate terms so they would know something better to say. We, including the principal. ask the children when they do something to someone, would you want them to that to you? Well, that goes for all people, big and small. No knowing that teacher's personality and not being there and actually seeing what she did, it is hard to say what and how severe of action the parent should take. I sure would, if I were here, park myself in that classroom to see for myself what is going on. That is her right as a parent, guaranteed.

Jackie - posted on 04/15/2012

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Rachelle,
That woman was not a teacher, she was a monster. I don't have any idea what she was doing in the position of teacher in a preschool. I have worked for 35 years and worked with many children who were shy. The best thing to do is keep your distance, let the child be part of the group and make friends. They warm up to kids way before they do adults. I have had so many parents tell me their child was shy and I told them, they didn't have to talk to me but hopefully they will talk to the other children. I worry more about those who cling to me or my aide and no matter how much we encourage them to play with the kids, they don't do that very much. I had 3 and 4s together for many years and they are quite different. It is more intimidating on a three year old, I think, especially if they haven't been in many social situations and parents who actually pay attention to them and spend time doing things with them. Some kids,unfortunately, don't get much attention from adults in their lives so they are defensive and don't understand why someone is trying to direct them and help them adjust to school. If you deal with it right, they will come around but you have to gain their trust, little by little and be consistent. Sometimes, a child will bond with my aide and talk to her and that is just fine. The only thing I hope for the shy child is they come to one of us if something is wrong that is not obvious like having wet pants. I don't like for kids to pick on other kids and shy kids are an easy target and a teacher needs to be aware of that. My gosh, no wonder you feel the way you do about preschool teachers. I know i would've handled your son a whole lot differently and you would probably have a different child today. Shame on her for all those ugly things she did and then turning her back on you. I have always talked to a parent, no matter where I was or what I might be doing, in and out of the school. Those children are the most important people to any parent worth their salt. I will give you an example of a child I encountered. He had been put in a preschool in another school in my district and the teacher scared this child and the grandmother was there to see it. She showed up at my school with him because she heard we did a good job with kids. He was very shy and now he was afraid on top of it. He eased him into the flow of things and his grandmother was welcomed and could come every day if she wanted to. She is my friend to this day, we were born on year apart on the same day. I just kept my distance for the little fella and little by little warmed up to him and his emotional issues started to fade away and he made friends but he is still quite and shy. He is still at our school and even had his mom bring me a rose last year. I am thankful I understood where he was coming from and what he needed. Nobody should force themself on a kid, no matter who it is! My preschool is in the public school, by the way. I see more and more children who are trying to raise themselves and it has changed how they act so I have to consider where each of them have come from and know they cannot all be treated the same. I know my kids like the back of my hand. I visit their homes and meet with their parents often. I just ask them if there is something I do that is upsetting to them or their child, to please ask me first and if my explanation is not satisfactory, I will be glad to talk to them with my principal. If i do something or say something I think is wrong, I am not too big to apoligize. Sometimes I have called the wrong name or thought I might have been a little rough on a child, so I talk to them and tell them I am sorry and listen to what they have to say. All i can say, is shame on that woman, she doesn't need to be with children. I would question her degree and if she is even a people person at all. She should probably be on a garage truck. Whatever happened to her was well deserved. BTW, I have a child, one only and he is 18 now. He is one of the nicest young men ever but he always knew his mom was behind him. Luckily, I didn't have to talk to a teacher except about how he was progressing and now he is going to graduate in May. I do hope your child comes out of this tramua and that he has better experiences in the future. My suggestion would be to go and observe by yourself in any class that you consider sending him to. That is your right as a parent! If they try to tell you different, they are lying.

Regina - posted on 04/15/2012

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She called him a crybaby and the principal and school district needs to hear about this one! It's not her first nor last time she will be calling her students a crybaby! Put a stop to that now.

Suzie - posted on 04/15/2012

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I should have mentioned that I have been teaching for 18 years. Yes, we all make mistakes. But, a teacher that loves children would admit to a mistakes when it hurts a child. She would be heart broken. Pride cannot get in the way of what's best for each child. Education is not something that's mass produced, each child matters! This teacher needs to be asked why she still teaches. Maybe she was a good teacher that has lost her way and just needs a wake up call. Going to the principle is the only answer for all involved!

Sarah - posted on 04/15/2012

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it isn't (in my opinion I can't speak for karen) about the school board doing anything about it is about this being recorded on the teachers file, so that if this continues to happen or escallate each time will not be seen as the first, but a continuing string of occurances, if it dosn't well its a single blip on the teachers file for a yes relatively minor offence.

In australia we have an item in the news about problems that have come to light about certain preists, (and yes I realise this is a much bigger issue to those who know what 'm refering to and I am NOT puting this teacher in the same category this is an example to make a point only) a big part of why the problem got as big as it did was because it was treated on a case by case basis, and so trends in behaviour ever came to light, and so they were all seen as one off incidents that were repented for and would never happen again.

just because nothing appears to happen, dosn't meen nothing has happened, but in part I do agree with one thing you said Marti, you have to pick your battles, but as she is having a problem with the teacher and the teacher is not responding, informing the principal of the issue is the next step, but I wouldn't take it beyond that, once they are aware though any further problems with this teacher if they do nothing about it become their responcibility, at least that is my understanding

Marti - posted on 04/15/2012

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If she does this.... Nothing will happen. The school board and principal have MUCH bigger issues to deal with.

Marti - posted on 04/15/2012

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I think you should drop it. She isn't going to target him, but if you continue to make a big deal of this then you will only be making it worse for your child. You need to try to have a good relationship with her for the sake of your son. I am sure she does not have ill will toward your son at all. Could she have picked better words.... Probably... But she is human; she will make mistakes sometimes( especially if she is young and new to the profession). You cannot get all worked up over things like this. Express your concerns and then try to move past it. Over the next thirteen years, your child will have a lot of different teachers. Unfortunately, probably worse things will happen. You have to pick your battles for your sake and his ..... Or you will be the one labeled as one of " those mothers", and when something big happens, they will be less likely to take you seriously.

Debbie - posted on 04/15/2012

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As a teacher, she should be focusing on the positive behaviors of paying attention. If this was a one time occurance, refocus him and encourage him to follow along in the future. If it is an ongoing problem, then she needs to involve you. Addressing this in front of the class is so inappropriate even if you don't wish to say it that way to her. We as parents and teachers are trying to teach reading comprehension. That means making inferences! This certainly would be an easy conclusion to make from her statement. Shame on her! I am so sorry you and your son had to endure this.

User - posted on 04/14/2012

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I feel like she could of just said we dont cry in the classroom...maybe took him aside and talked with him for a couple miniutes...I am just plain scared to death to send my kids to school becasue of reasons like this...and to have actual teachers on here defending this teachers actions just make it all the worse...my little boy is the sweetest thing and i would be crushed to have him hurt and embarrassed like that....

Alisa - posted on 04/14/2012

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You know Im reading how we don't know how it feels to be a teacher and how they need to live by expectations and standards. Granted I haven't read every single post of what was written but no one is saying that the teachers have easy jobs. I feel whether u r a mother, teacher, etc everyone profession needs to be held up to certain expectations and standards for their children and themselves. Every job is difficult so lets not go there with the feeling sorry for the teacher game. No teacher should insult a child....period!!! No matter how stressful. Every profession has its stress and could be at times understood.....but in no means when it comes to insults to a child or adult is that called professional. Children have emotions just like Adults do. Just sayin.........

Rachelle - posted on 04/14/2012

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After reading a few posts I have some things to ad to my comment.
Jackie,
Have you ever had your child picked on by a teacher. Let me share my experience of pre school with you. You asked why we are so hard on teachers, because they are helping us mold our children for the futur. I put my son in a pre school program in September. I was a very involved parent going on field trips etc. My son is a very very shy child. I had told the teacher this when we registered him in the class and told her that this was the reason we put him in class to get him to open up and come out of his shell a little. Day after day the teacher would complaine that he was too quiet. We kept adialoguengoing but she refused to listen to me.two weeks into school I was told my child needed to be tested to see if there was something who no with him because he still was not open with the teacher. We went thru the testing got documentation saying he is perfectly normal just shy and that you can't cure shyness he will talk to her when he is ready. She decided she was going to teach him a lesson and leave him in his pissy clothing till he asked to be changed(he was not required to be potty trained but we were in the process). He was already shy this made him completely shut down. In December parents where invited to spend the day at school with thechildren what I saw shocked me. When my son was with he was talking and playing like a normal child as soon as she came near him he would clam up and not even respond to me. She also on three different occasions that day told my son to stop running even when I told hr that he was not running she would not respond to me or apologize to my child. It would simply turn her back to us. I remoed him fro the school immediatly. I do not for one second regret going to the school board. And I am glad the pre school was shut down. Turns out that there was several complaints aganst her. It's our job to protect our kids from harm. That's why we are soo hard on teachers. Oh and my son was only three and he was diagnosed with select mutism cause by trauma after go ing to the pre school that was suppose to be helping him. We are now working on rebuilding his confidence so he can attend school without severe anxiety. Not all teachers are bad but the ones that are need to be reprimanded some way.

Rachelle - posted on 04/14/2012

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I would talk to the principle if that doesn't work take it to the school board.

Sarah - posted on 04/14/2012

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Jackie,

you assume that we haven't volunteered, and as I said earlier nobody was talking about her not being stressed, and also no one has said "that teacher should be fired!" (granted there were alot of posts I may have missed someone saing it) but just as if my husband at work (this never actually happened) said that to one of his staff, crying because they were called on to deliver work, they hadn't done, we would all expect hiim to be written up by HR, it wouldn't matter that the work was on a deadline, or that it would be his fault for not delivering it, or even that the member of staff had told him the work was completed and had been on the internet not doing work every time he had walked past. no one would bat an eyelid at the repercusions, and we would all be saying it was unproffesional of my husband to have done it even me. If a police ofice steps out of line, it dosn't matter how stressfull their job is, there is an out cry from society, when a proffessional sports anything steps out of line in their pesonal life they are held up as a roll model and all you hear is "think of the children, what message is this sending them?" how is a teacher any different, they arn't, and unlike the sport person a teacher has gone into a proffession were they have deliberately set themselves as a roll model exclusively for children, the sports personality likely just wanted to play the game.

Val - posted on 04/14/2012

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Yes.. send a copy of your e-mails to the principal, superintendant and school board members along with a new e-mail stating that teachers of young children (especially) need to exercise upmost control of their emotions, so they don't blurt things that could damage a child. A child will remember not only what was said but how it made him feel, which will reflect on future behaviors. This teacher needs to teach her students compassion by apologising to him in front of the other children, and talk about respect, making good choices and being responsible for amending bad choices. DOCUMENT everything, keep all correspondense and keep in touch with the principal and superintendant. Remember... you are paying their salary through your tax paying dollars. Expect the best for your child and fight for it. You both deserve it.

Jackie - posted on 04/14/2012

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Why are you people so hard on teachers? Have you walked in their shoes? Have you tried to manage 20 or more small children by yourself and have to meet all the standards that are expected of a teacher these days? It is like the one lady Ariel said, Kindergarten is like 2nd grade now and kids are being pushed too far, too fast but the teachers are expected to do it whether they agree or not. They want to evaluate us on how well the kids do on a standardized test and if we teach anything from the test, we get jacked up! If you haven't walked in a teacher's shoes, you should be a little more empathic towards them. Being a mom is one thing, being a teacher is another. As a preschool teacher, I play the role of mom, grandma( I am 56), nurse, doctor, counselor,and anything else you can think of. 5 year olds are not able to handle all that is being thrown at them but do you know who they never ask about the curriculum? The teacher, of course! You just cannot imagine the stress we face day in and day out, with very little discipline and a whole lot of expectations to meet. Go visit your child's classroom, any of you who were so quick to want to judge that teacher and see what it is really like. When parents come to volunteer, it never fails to change their outlook. I have heard more times than I can count, "Oh, my God!, how do you do this?" I say, it isn't always easy and some days I handle it better than others. We are people, too and we have feelings and most of us do the best we can and that usually is not good enough for the critical public until they try to do our job and then it is a little different. Think about it. Just saying...

Michelle - posted on 04/14/2012

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Wow, what an unprofessional teacher. She could have said a million other things, but she chose to go that route? Really?! She said we dont have crybabies in the classroom?? Well, I would say to her that we don't have BULLIES as teachers.

Sarah - posted on 04/13/2012

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Ariel, let me just say yes you are right not every teacher is out to get their students, and not everyone says the right thing at the right time, but when you say the wrong thing especially to a child who was obviously feeling emotional and bad about themselves at the time, you are responcible for the way you are perceived, no one is saying that the teacher wasn't stressed and by no means was anyone saying the child was beeing a perfect angel, everyone and I am sure included in this is the mum who started the posting understands that everyone makes mistakes and says things they don't meen, but when trying to open a dialoge with this teacher she was fobbed off, and told she was simply wrong about the situation, the problem is we teach our kids that sometimes what you say hurts someone elses feelings, you don't meen to but that persons feelings are hurt none the less, and even though you didn't meen to you need to appolagise to the person whos feeling you have hurt, as I am sure would be nearly the exact line that the teacher in question would use to settle a simmilar fight in her class room between two students, I will bet also that one of the class rules, if not school rules is about name caling not being okay. The teacher is a role model in this class room, and like it or not she sets the example for how the children she teaches treat each other, and in this the example she is setting is not a good one, and she dosn't seem willing to even admit that maybe she could have used a different phrase. But just let me ask you would you be saying maybe she was having a bad day if what she said was "don't be stupid."? because to me the two are as bad as each other.

Kat - posted on 04/13/2012

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Oh Boy...I've had one of these before..And I would make sure to write a complaint to the Principal so that this is in her file..And I would have a meeting with the both of them without the child present..She obviously doesn't have any consideration for children...If she was at lunch with her friends and she ordered a BIG MAC and BIGGIE FRIES..And I said Some People need to quit eating So Much that's why they are getting SO FAT...Would she Understand that then???( Assuming shes Fat of Course,) Anyhow...Hoping she will be stopped from Scaring any other children...Good Luck to You!! Katt!!

Sarah - posted on 04/13/2012

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Ariel LOVED your feedback as a mother of two and teacher I couldnt have said it better!!!

Kristine - posted on 04/13/2012

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Never good!
Learn Early, teachers
are NOT always right,
and do NOT , have an ok
BULLING card!

[deleted account]

My husband being in the educational system I find myself moved to make a reply. My first problem is your belief that your son will be or is already being targeted by this teacher. Counter to most gossip and fear mongering media and parents, teachers aren't out to get their students. They want to teach and see those lights of understanding brighten children's eyes. They want to uphold standards that prepare kids for life. They have too much on their plates to try to single out kids to "make" them fail. And honestly kids are pretty good at digging themselves a hole they can't get out of all by themselves.

When you say this is the second time do you mean this is the second time your child has become distracted and cried when he was called on? Maybe you should try to work with your son and teacher for ways to help him stay on track and try to help him understand that being lost is certainly not the end of the world and make sure that he feels comfortable asking where he should resume reading. Try finding a way to ease his panic at having become distracted and simply jump in where everyone is.

Please consider that what is being taught in Kindergarden is what used to be the old 2nd grade. Our children and teachers are under serious pressure to learn and teach so much in a short time that we forget to let them be kids. I just finished watching some amazing critiques of education and one presentation was all about how to make classrooms more available for boys who's more active and rambunctious tendencies make this currently compressed system very hard on them.

Also asking more about what was going on in class before and after your son cried is a better way to get a whole picture understanding of what was going on than just a short exchange that happened. Did she follow that statement with anything to help your son transition to finding his place? Did he continue to cry? What happened to the reading group activity? What i'm saying is that at age 5 your son cannot report to you the whole story of what happened and situations that involve so many children are rarely as simple as what he will be able to communicate. Find out what is happening before jumping to the conclusion that his teacher is unprofessional and an unfit teacher. Making efforts to work with the teacher is more than sending a couple emails about what she's doing wrong. No one really takes an attack well, including teachers.

Could she have responded differently? yes. Do you always know what to say to your kid and say the perfect thing? I certainly don't. Teachers are as human as we are and it is up to us to teach conflict resolution by example not just strong arming our way through whatever problem arises in life.

Marie - posted on 04/13/2012

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Dottie, I can see your point... I was a teacher (Middle School) and sometimes, as human beings, you say things you regret. And yes, our society has become LAUGHABLY hyper sensitive to perceived or real slights, and slurs and slander. I do think 5 is a little young to expect such a comment to roll off a kid's back, though. Kids that age are such people-pleasers and I am sure it hurt.

Linda - posted on 04/13/2012

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Definately report to the principal and request a parent/teacher/principal conference so you know for sure the principal talks to the teacher...in front of you.....the teacher should NOT have said that...whether she really said what she said....or if she called him straight out..crybaby...either way she did it....was wrong!!!!! 5 yr olds cry!!! Doesn't mean that gives her the right to make kids feel bad like she did.......I would be soooooooo mad if that happened to my child.....the school year is almost over...so keep him in the class....but talk to your son....and be sure he knows to tell you if she does or says anything again to him that is unfair......wow!! I can't believe some teachers these days!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good luck!

Betty - posted on 04/13/2012

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Your son is only 5 and he feels she has called him a crybaby. Whether she directly did or not is irrelevant. If that is how he perceives it, then that is how it is. That is highly unprofessional and the fact that it is not the 1st time is absolutely appalling! I would definitely be setting up a meeting with the principal, with e-mails in hand. She is bullying your child (and who knows how many other children?) and that is inexcusable for a teacher of any grade, but from a K teacher, it seems even worse to me. And like someone else mentioned, I would definitely be sitting down with your son and explaining that not everyone treats people like they deserve to be treated and how mom & dad will treat you. Reassure him that it is ok to express how he is feeling and maybe practice putting words with his feelings. Good luck with all of this. {{{HUGS!}}}

Sarah - posted on 04/13/2012

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I got the idea that it happened twice from the original post, she said it was the second time it happened 2nd last line, if I'm wrong well it dosn't change the fact that the teacher didn't see the problem with what she did.

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You handled it fine! I have had a problem with a teacher being inappropriate to my 5th grader. I sent her an email with quotes (kept track) and asking her to not do this anymore. It was blunt, to the point and professional. I NEVER HEARD BACK! SO,I scheduled a meeting with the principal and ended up speaking to him and the VP. I showed them a copy of my email and told them everything she said to him. When confronted, she claimed she never received my email at all. Yet, my email was working just fine. Kind of funny because as I was waiting for her reply, she gave me crazy looks as I was picking up my son one day. I didn't know what she even looked like but my son told me who it was when I asked....but, remember, she didn't get my email!! OKAYYYYY! She ended up calling my husband and talking with him (I wasn't available) and apologized saying things were taken out of context, etc.....We haven't had an more issues since. I suggest that be your next step. You just need to schedule a meeting and say you have some concerns. Don't give them any more info than that or they will clean up the issues and act as if you are crazy once you get there. :)

Danielle - posted on 04/13/2012

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this would be MY response..."oh HELL no." I would be absolutely livid. This kind of thing happens a lot more often than we think it does, which is one of the main reasons why my kids are schooled at home. This teacher has shown an incredible lack of respect towards your son, and you have every right on the world to be upset. Never be afraid to take this further...if you don't then she may feel entitled to keep this going. Your child does not deserve to be humiliated in front of anyone, especially classmates. This kind of behaviour from a teacher sets things up for bullying. I realize that it's nearing the end of the school year, but you can still request he change classes...I had to do this with my daughter when we had her in school. This teacher needs to be reported. Good Luck, and good job on your part for being your son's greatest protector and advocate.

Dottie - posted on 04/13/2012

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The entire episode started out because:..."He started crying because he got behind due to the fact that he wasn’t listening and doing what he was supposed to"

In my opinion (yes, it's MY OPINION) Karen should stop criticizing the teacher and teach her son to pay attention in class. This whole situation could've been avoided if the boy was listening to his teacher.

Sarah - posted on 04/13/2012

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we like to talk about things in our house, so I told my son (he is 8) what happend, and asked him if he would think the teacher was saying he was a crybaby, and he said he would, and as a point most things roll off his back

Kandi - posted on 04/13/2012

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Considering the teachers response and this being a 2nd occurrence, I would strongly encourage you to discuss this with the principal. This is in no way an ok thing to say to a child.

Sarah - posted on 04/13/2012

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The problem is that it is irrelevant if he was crying inapropriately, her responce was to bully him, not once but twice, and then didn't see the problem with what she did, she could have said "there's no need to cry, now where were you..." and yes your child is watching how you both handle this but so was every other child in that class, that teacher was effectivly saying to every child in that class room that bullying is okay, but that this little boy is okay to target. but I agree with the mum above me, you do need to toughen up your kids, but it is not the place of your childs teacher and definatly not in front of the whole class

Francine - posted on 04/13/2012

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That's what's wrong with society today, you can't say anything to kids because you might offend them, they need to be told in no uncertain terms the way they act is they way they are and that's why kids today have a hard time with criticism. Let me tell you if my child is acting like a crybaby I will flat out tell him so and not sugar coat it because I don't want to hurt his feelings, their feelings get hurt every single day going to school by other kids, they need to learn to deal with it. Now I know a lot of moms out there are reading this and cringing thinking what kind of monster is this, but my kids have learned how to take criticism from people around them and have learned to deal with it and I don't care how old they are they need to learn this at an early age.

Patty - posted on 04/13/2012

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A principle is a tenet, a general rule. A PRINCIPAL is the head of the child's school.

Jennifer - posted on 04/13/2012

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" just ask her how you both can work together to teach your son how to appropriately express his emotions and to accept that he actually was being a crybaby and help him fix it!"

This above response is actually NOT ok. It strongly suggests that the teacher was right in even suggesting that her son was a 'crybaby' and correct in doing so!

Professional teachers are very carefully taught to NOT say such things in a classroom nor to label a child and this is labelling.

Jennifer - posted on 04/13/2012

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Report her unprofessional conduct to the principal. Also to the regional education board. If really worried about her mistreating your son then also firmly request that your son go into another classroom. If the school refuses then simply use that power you have as a Mum and move your child to a school you respect. Remember the saying about the first 7 years being really important? Let that guide you!

Jax - posted on 04/13/2012

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This clearly needs taken to that teachers supervisor, including her email response. She has not only insulted a small child in a most inappropriate way, publicly humiliating him in the process, but she has had the temerity to defend her behaviour instead of apologizing and promising never to do anything similar again!
I'd like to see her likes never allowed NEAR children, let alone the likes of anything as fragile as a 5 year old!
I would also demand your child be moved from her classroom, as A: She HAS insulted him and publicly humiliated him and B: She has given you cause to fear she will target him for more abuse.

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