Lisa - posted on 11/09/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )
My 16 y/o daughter moved out behind my back to her dads house after she got mad at me for grounding her because she was flunking 4 classes. She won't return. Now my son is telling me he is going to live with his dad too. I got served custody modification papers from my ex demanding full custody of both kids. We have joint custody currently. They both talk bad about me and put their dad on a pedestal. I got remarried three years ago after being a single mom for about 8 years. My son hates my new husband and tells me all I do is yell and ground them for stupid stuff. My daughter tells me our house is stressful and she isn't coming back. I was going to fight the ex in court over this but the more time passes, the more I just feel defeated with both kids putting me down and feel like its a losing battle. This has put so much stress in my life and I'm sad, angry, hurt, etc. is there anyone else that has dealt with this type of situation before, I need to know I'm not the only one.
To add to this every time I try to contact my daughter to speak to her, text her, etc, she ignores my calls and texts. Finally she responded to me, the first couple of encounters were not pleasant because I was so angry and hurt by her emptying out her room while I was at work and not telling me anything, but the last time I spoke to her for one hour only it went okay because I didn't talk about any of the recent issues and her moving out. I'm so hurt that I am only worth one hour of her time here and there. Its like I no longer matter. Also my son is so disrespectful of me now, he has nothing to do with me when he does come because he is just waiting until he gets to live with his dad full time. He told me his dad told him it will take a few months, but he will be able to live with him permanently soon.
I understand I should reach out to my children often, but I'm tired of being the doormat and being told no I am not coming to see you today or no I don't have to see you or come to your house. I'm just done with it. They say if you love something set it free....never thought that meant my kids, but slowly i'm coming to realize that is exactly what I have to do for my own sanity as well.