Lauren - posted on 10/25/2012 ( no moms have responded yet )
I didnt know him long before I got pregnant and I decided to keep the baby. I told him if he didnt want to help or if he had any reason this was going to make him miserable, he could leave I wouldnt hunt him down. He decided to stay. I assumed this meant he was going to make an effort.
Three months into my pregnancy he quit his job that he had only had for five months to begin with, claiming he was going to find a better one. Here we are nine months later with no job.
Originally we were living in Colorado, but at 8 months pregnant and barely paying all the bills myself I made the decision to move to Florida to be near family because I had a feeling I was going to need help. He got very angry with me saying he didnt want to move, he liked it in Colorado and I was being selfish. I told him that he had five months to find something to help me and he didnt so I was doing what I had to do, I wanted to stay in Colorado too. I also told him he could stay, didnt bother me. Well he decided to come so I made the mistake of leasing a place that is 1500 to live in after all is said and done thinking I would get some help shortly after arriving.
To no surprise it has been four months going on five and he sits at home smoking cigarettes, playing video games, and on the rare occasion he'll do the dishes. He makes dinner and acts like that is way more than enough for him to be doing, when I work for my mom, bring our daughter to work and take care of her all day since Im breastfeeding, Im trying to start my on business because I dont make nearly enough to support our daughter once she starts eating solids. I come home and I need break, but he spends fifteen minutes with her and finds a reason that she needs to come back to me. Or my favorite, he'll claim he needs to be alone and go out drinking. Where the hell is he getting this money? He hasnt even bought our daughter a package of diapers, not to mention he begs me to buy him cigs all the time and when I started telling him no I found he stole my credit card to get cigs! I told him I wanted him out a few times, and no movement. His family wont take him and none of his friends in Colorado..no surprise really, but I dont want to be stuck with him either. We broke up a while ago because I couldnt take him anymore. I told him I would let him live with me for a month IF he got a job and only to give him a few checks to move out! He cant even do that.
The worst part is I see all these women happily married, being taken care of, dads who are playful with their children. It makes me want that so bad and not only do I not have that, but I have to live with the direct opposite with no chance of finding something better as long as I cant get him out.
Not to mention, I would like to have a roommate who pays rent while I get on my feet. I cant move in with family, no one has room for us, so I need help paying bills, I dont make enough Im constantly asking for help buying groceries and other necessities. Anyone with any ideas, Im desperate!
Oh and I cant get him by claiming hes not paying child support because I didnt put him in the birth certificate feeling like if I wasnt chasing him for payments hed leave me alone, not to mention I know hell never get a job to pay it anyway, so Im not giving him automatic 50% custody.