Theme kitchens are so frakking stupid!

Random - posted on 04/09/2012 ( 8 moms have responded )

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Kitchens. They are the most common room (apart from nurseries) to have some sort of theme. Some have rooster themes, some have Italian or French cuisine themes, some have nostalgic 1950's diner themes, some have specific colors that evoke a theme. The list is endless and spans generations, marking its territory with mushroom-shaped cookie jars and olive or rust-colored appliances along the way.



Not many people choose cannibalism as a kitchen theme.



I did.



It wasn't always this way. When we first moved into this house, "apples" was my theme. That's it. Just "apples". Plain, boring, non-threatening...apples. But they were everywhere! I had apples at the end of the ceiling fan pull chains, I had apple clocks and salt shakers and numerous cookie jars (on an apple-lined shelf). I even painted them on the cabinets. (Side note: Metal Cabinets are an abomination and should not exist ever, as they are horrifically evil, but that's a post for another day.)



The kitchen was so ridiculously covered that I eventually developed an aversion to the fruit. I was sick to death of those frigging apples, but I kept that theme for YEARS.





Eventually, I redid the kitchen and something inside me said, "For the love of all that is holy, get rid of the godforsaken apples! Every kitchen doesn't need a theme!"

However, in my desire to go theme-less, I inadvertently chose one anyway: cannibalism.



















I'm really more of a people person anyway.







What did YOU choose?

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Random - posted on 04/10/2012

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@ Elfrieda. I can't elaborate much without showing you a picture and that is impossible on this site. I've already been reprimanded for sharing the link to my blog and my wrist is getting sting-y from all the slaps.

Suffice it to say, I have Soylent Green paraphernalia throughout the room and a stone Silence of the Lambs spoon-rest on the wall that says "Friends are best with fava beans and a nice bottle of chianti."



That shouldn't violate any TOS or put a bunch in anyone's knickers.

Elfrieda - posted on 04/09/2012

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In high school I inadvertently collected an alarming number of frogs. There were plush frogs, frog necklaces, frog bookmarks, wooden figurines shaped like frogs, glass frogs, frog stationery, and I don't even remember what else. 10 years later I am on still on high alert for anything themed, and have managed to avoid it in our kitchen. (not to mention I still have to deflect frog-themed gifts from some of my aunts)

Themes are not my favourite way to decorate, that's for sure.



And yet, please elaborate. How do you have cannibalism as a theme? How is that even possible? Skull danglies from the curtain rods? The "How to Cook Man" recipe from the Chronicles of Narnia framed on the wall? A crashed airplane as a table centerpiece?

Random - posted on 04/09/2012

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lol! I suppose that's okay, since we don't actually perform acts of cannibalism.



These themes are sneaky,Chrystal.

Chrystal - posted on 04/09/2012

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For some unfortunate reason I picked cows. I have no idea how it happened it was a slow migration of cows into my kitchen now they are everywhere! We don't even use dairy products in our house lol

Random - posted on 04/09/2012

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I bet you have something, even if you don't realize it. Could be that your theme is "neutral, earth tones". Could be. Then again, it could be "crumbs".

What. It could be!

Amanda - posted on 04/09/2012

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There is no theme in my kitchen, personally I hate ALL themes in any room in a house. My house is very neutral, earth tones, along with black highlights.

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