This stepmom needs husband to show her some love too!

Maddy - posted on 06/21/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I am a stepmom to 2 boys. The boys live with their mom and they come to our house every thursday and every other weekend. Also on some holidays we get them longer and we get them for a whole month during the summer. I love them very very much and i know my husband doesn't like the limited time that he gets the boys and wants to spend as much time as he can with them. My husband has never been much of a romantic and i am. I would like for him to take me out to a nice romantic dinner, take me the movies or even stay home and make a romantic evening at home just the two of us like date nights. I try telling him sometimes that i would like us to go to a bed and breakfast, you know i nice getaway just the two of us. But he always shuts me down. Everytime i mention going somewhere he always mentions taking the kids. the only time we really leave to do something fun or nice is when we have the kids. if i mention something about us taking a nice romantic getaway he mentions how we cant afford it but when it comes to taking or splurging on the kids he has no problem with that. i feel like what about me? i take care of my husband, the kids (we dont have any of out own), the house so dont i deserve something nice. the other day i told him i have been looking at a bed and breakfast, and he said the boys may like that, i told him i was talking about just me and him. then he tells me that money could be used for repairs around the house which really disappointed me. 5 minutes later he said he would really like to take the boys to disney world. i know he only has limited time with the boys but i need some kind of "attention" too. when he was with his ex wife he made sure he did things for her and went places. what about me? i work, cook, clean, take care of the kids when we have them (he take care of the kids too of course) but it would be nice for him show some appreciation plus its healthy for a relationship to take time out together. i dont know how to express how i feel to him without him getting upset or me feeling selfish.

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Maddy - posted on 06/21/2012

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@Louise Gough i know i need to tell him how i feel and what i want. and i do love the kids so much and i enjoy doing things spending time together as a family. i would just like for my husband to show me a little something too instead everything always being about the kids.

Louise - posted on 06/21/2012

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Just tell him straight, cards on the table time. You need love and attention too. You love the kids but even if they were both your children you would still have mini breaks away with grandparents stepping in to allow it. The kids are important but so is this relationship.

Romantic gestgures do not have to be expensive, a picnin in the park the two of you, a trip to the cinema with a nice meal, a dvd with a bottle of wine cuddled up on the sofa. A little attention means a lot! Tell him you need to feel loved and appreciated and see what he comes up with!

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