time outs or ignoring behavior, which is best?

Carla - posted on 07/11/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )




My 2 1/2 yr old gets mad at me, then hits her sisters or throws things, and looks at me for my reaction. Now my 1 yr old is copying her! I've tried ignoring my 2yr old, but then she just finds bigger things to throw. I've tried time out but it only works for a bit, then we're back to the same thing when she gets mad again. Help!


Sarah - posted on 07/11/2013




I have found that at this age what works is just the repetition of the discipline. I would say keep doing the time outs and taking things away. Let her freak and have her fit. My rule is you can sit and cry in time out, but if you start to scream then time out is done in your room and you are not allowed to come out until you have calmed down. I have found that in general 2's are hard. The time out spot has a revolving door on it many days and sometimes they are in that time out spot more then they are playing, BUT if you stick with it and keep doing the time out EVERY time it does start to click eventually. I do day care and find that by time they turn 3 yrs old just a warning of a time out is all it takes and the behavior usually stops....not always but MUCH less time outs then what was before.


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Carla - posted on 07/11/2013




Everytime she comes out of time out, I tell her why we dont throw things or hit, and have her pick it up. I've taken cartoons away, stuffed animals, when I tell her I will be taking something away if she continues,she ignores me til I do it, then she freaks even more! She can tell me why we dont throw things, but doesn't seem to be making the connection to what it means? Or maybe she doesn't care?

Michelle - posted on 07/11/2013




Have you tried talking to her? Explaining why we don't throw things in a calm voice and giving her the reasons as well. Making sure you explain it in a way she would understand. That way you can give her a consequence. If she throws something then she will either lose something important to her or have a time out.
You need to find her currency, every child is different and sometimes it a bit of trial and error to find what works for yours.

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