training up a boy

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Dove - posted on 10/23/2013

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A parenting class might be an excellent idea. It is never ok to yell at (though it totally happens in this house) or 'cane' your child (though I'm not anti-spanking either) no matter what age they are.....

Time out can work w/ a one year old. Distraction and redirection are typically best at this stage. Firm, clear, and consistent boundaries (ex: if it's ok to play w/ the tv remote today, but not tomorrow simply because you don't have the patience for it... the kid will just end up confused and 'defiant'). A LOT of patience is needed at this age. They are testing and learning every minute... which can be very frustrating to an adult.

Jodi - posted on 10/23/2013

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Amanda, one is different to an almost two year old. I totally agree with Evelyn that at one, time out is not really appropriate because they don't understand it. The suggestion of gentle redirection, calming oneself down, firmly using words such as no (then redirecting them) are the best forms of discipline for this age.

With regard to yelling and cane's? Never. Not at any age, ever. Cane's are not appropriate (and where I live it is child abuse and considered a criminal offence) and yelling just gets you into a cycle of conflict that is not productive for anyone.

Amanda - posted on 10/23/2013

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Time out is a good method - I've done a lot of Research and I am a new mom - don't get me wrong I've help raised plenty of kids .... I'm always open to new ideas to raising children.... what i meant by time out is like my cousin he is one almost two- his mom uses a round circle rug and puts him in time out for a min. - like he knows he isn't aloud to go out side by him self - well due to him going out on the porch his mother gave him a time out for 2mins scent's he is almost two...
But if any of you have any other methods I'm defiantly open for new ideas...

Ev - posted on 10/20/2013

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Shawnn-I agree with you on this, parenting classes or something akin to this. If not that, find someone you do know that has had experience with kids say your own mother, a friend, sister, in-laws....they could tell you what they have done with their kids at this age that you might put to use.

Amanda-No offense but time outs for a one year old mean little or nothing to them. They do not understand them at this age and their little brains are not comprehending what you mean by sitting in time out and why.

Best advice I can tell you: For a one year old (any child under age of two) redirect them to another activity or distract them from what they are doing. Use the word no firmly as this is one word a child knows quickly enough. Tell them no and why its not a good idea to do what they did. Use simple terms they can understand. You do have to learn to lower your voice and find a firm tone that works with your child. The only time to yell or shout is if the situation could be dangerous to them and that is the only thing that may catch their attention in time. Because even if you yell for the tiniest things, your child will learn to turn you out eventually and then you are not left with many choices. Wait on the time out until the age of two, it makes a difference. I know because I have raised two kids and I work with this age range.

Amanda - posted on 10/18/2013

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tips - for parents feel like your about to shout try count down yah I know it sounds silly but it does work if that dont try the step away count method - i use both and they work - yes dealing with kids who push those buttons over and over - it may and can be trying, I know that- but time out method works - if you would like to have more methods - i can check more out, also check out supper Nannie 911 - she has some grat ideas that just work...

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 10/18/2013

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Like I said, parenting classes.

They'll help you gain confidence in your methods (as long as you aren't shouting and caning a 1 yo). And teach you alternate methods that may work just as well.

Amanda - posted on 10/18/2013

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i believe no its not okay .... its better to use a firm voice and be eye level with the toddler - use time outs child sits in time out for mount of mins. age of child ... tell the child why they are being put in time out ... and after time is up .. have them give you hug to say im sorry for the age of one - as they get old have them tell you why they were in time out and still have hem say im sorry - and parent should give the child a hug to let the child know i still love you- my daughter is one and i've been using this method and it work amazing as long as its followed through with- and one key is while in time out child gets up put them back in time out and walk away not saying anything to them ...

Hilda - posted on 10/18/2013

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how do I get my one year boy in line. I find it so stressful when disciplining him without shouting at him.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 10/18/2013

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If that's the best you can do, I recommend parenting classes.

Consistent redirection and a CALM voice will do wonders.

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