Ungrateful

Jennifer - posted on 07/28/2016 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Hi! I hope everyone is doing well! I'm a young single mother with a 14 year old daughter. She spends a lot of time with her grandmother who buys her whatever she wants. My finances won't allow for that so when I take her shopping for things like school supplies, groceries, or even clothes, she can act ungrateful when she doesn't get everything she wants. I've talked to her grandmother about this to no avail. How can I make her more grateful for what I can provide without interfering with her and her grandmother's relationship?

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Jennifer - posted on 08/14/2016

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That was a great article! I need some Dave Ramsey advice myself. You've been great!

His - posted on 08/13/2016

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I am so glad to hear of your daughters receptiveness and of her entrepreneurial plans.
I had a feeling she would be open to solutions. Here is a helpful link. Dave Ramsey has very practical information about managing money. http://bit.ly/2btf1tD

Jennifer - posted on 08/11/2016

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Thank you for your input. I was very helpful. My daughter and I have talked about it, and she's been very receptive. She has decided to start pet sitting in our neighborhood. I like the idea of volunteering and teaching her to save money too.

His - posted on 07/30/2016

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Have you sat down and really shared your heart about this with your mom and your daughter, separately? Setting up guidelines for Grand mom is not a bad idea if you absolutely have to but if you two can strategize in the raising of your DD it’s way better. I love the volunteering idea. We were big on that. Also, is there any way your daughter can earn a little money? She can learn about saving up for things she wants and how far money really goes. It’s true that there are some who feel they are entitled but I seriously doubt this is your daughter. 14 is a great age to learn about the value of money and how to save and spend it. Maybe she could get a babysitting job for someone you know and trust. If she likes making things you might consider letting her get an account on Etsy to sell her creations. I encouraged my kids to read a lot. I started my own summer reading program with small cash incentives for every book read. I taught my kids to save 10% of any money they made just to have money set aside. They would save more if they wanted something special. They would put aside 10% to help others and they would spend some just for something fun like going to the movies, etc.. It gave them a better understanding of money and gave them much pride.

Dove - posted on 07/28/2016

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If grandma would not listen and respect my wishes as a mother... time w/ grandma would have been limited years ago. There's more to a relationship than being turned into an entitled brat. Anything grandma buys for her can stay at grandma's house...

Is there a homeless shelter or similar that you can have your daughter round up some of her things and donate to... or volunteer to work serving some meals? It's time for her to get out and see how great she has it even just on what you can provide for her because so many people would be thrilled to trade places w/ her.

Ev - posted on 07/28/2016

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You should have set some rules with grandmother a long time ago about spoiling her and getting her needs met. Once in a while getting spoiled is fine but it sounds constant. You should try to get grandma to see what it is doing to your daughter.

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