Randi - posted on 03/26/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )
Four weeks ago I gave birth to my daughter Maddison. She was 6 pounds, 36 weeks and her heart stopped beating the night before I delivered. I lost her due to a cmv infection that caused a placental ubruption. My pregnancy was perfect up to that point. I had no clue and now live in a constant state of denial. I have been told that this can never happen again, at lest not due to a cmv infection, it was a rare side effect of a common virus most of us have had without even knowing it. Yet because it caused the ubruption I will be considered high risk for precautionary measures but my doctor said he does not believe that it would be a horrible thing if i was to try again. I do not think my husband will want to. This would have been his first. (I have two from a previous marriage) He wasnt sure the entire eight months I was pregant about how he felt about being a father, it seemed as soon as he got excited I lost her. I know how horrible this is going to sound but in an attempt at reconnecting with my husband we ended up being have sex only two weeks after I gave birth. (I had just stopped bleeding and just craved the closeness) I am strangely comforted by the idea that maybe I could be pregnant. Is that impossible, how likely is it? i am completely numb most of the time and i know i need more time to heal physically and mentally but for some reason this makes it a bit easier to wake up in the morning which is the hardest part of my day, having to remind myself I dont get to have her. This is something I have to remind myself several times a day because I still feel i am going to meet her any day. When would I be able to tell if I am pregnant with a home test. I dont want to talk to any one about this.