Very conflicted about having more children, please help!!

Theresa - posted on 02/23/2015 ( 1 mom has responded )

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I am the mother of a 13 year old boy. I have been infertile for about 12 years now. About 8 years ago, I went through fertility treatment and was still unable to get pregnant. I have spent the past 13 years watching my husband's and my own siblings have child after child. I have been heartbroken at the fact that I could not have any more children. You see, when I was 10, my mother walked out on me and I vowed to myself that I would have lot's of children and love and nurture them. Well, I had finally accepted the fact that I would not be able to have anymore children, until recently. I have lost a large amount of weight and have been told that I can become pregnant again. I am excited and really looking forward to having a couple more kids. Except, my 13 year old is extremely against me having any other children. He has been raised as an only child and I understand that, but this is something I have wanted forever! My son gets so angry when I try to discuss it with him. Sometimes he shuts down and won't talk about it and other times he yells because he is so upset. I really don't know what to do. I know that this decision is for my husband and I to make, but it is really important for me to have support from my son. I have tried explaining things to him and at first he seems ok, but then he becomes angry about it. He said he will never talk to me again if I have more kids. Is it selfish of me to want more kids? Am I being unfair to him? Please help. My son is very active in sports and the older he gets, the less time he spends with me. He will be off to college in 4 1/2 years and I am not ready to have an empty nest!

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Raye - posted on 02/23/2015

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If it's what you and your husband want, then you should definitely explore your options to have more kids. Your son will adjust. You just have to let him know that he's going to have a brother or sister, that you won't love him any less, and that is how it is. Don't negotiate with him. Don't feel guilty about it.

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