Wanting another baby.... but he doesn't...

Lucy - posted on 01/27/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )




My fiance and I have been discussing babies for a while. I have an 8 and 4 year old. He is much older than me and his kids are already grown and out of the house. He thinks he is too old to have children, but when I spoke to my OBGYN he said that it would be totally fine.

I am trying really hard to come to terms with this because I love him so much and don't want this to cause problems between us.

Any advice?


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Jodi - posted on 01/27/2015




When he says he is too old, he probably doesn't mean physically too old to produce a baby......which seems to be the way you have interpreted it. As for something wrong with the baby, he's actually right - research has demonstrated that sperm also deteriorates in quality with age, and he may not be prepared to face that risk.

He is done. He's raised his kids. As a 45 year old woman myself, with children who are now grown, I can actually totally understand where he might be coming from. I wouldn't want to start over again either. I think you need to respect that.

Lucy - posted on 01/27/2015




He has just said that he doesn't think it is what is best for us. He is worried about there being an issue with the baby because he is older. That's all he has really said.

Ev - posted on 01/27/2015




Maybe he is done raising children? Maybe he does not want to go through the stages of a baby. What other reasons has he said for not wanting children with you?

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