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Bobbie - posted on 10/26/2012




When my daughter was 3 I placed her in a large daycare center for socialization. She didn't do well because there were few boys that took all the attention from the teachers to correct, put in time out and the like. When I saw what very little time my daughter had with healthy fun interaction I gave them notice that I was taking her out at the end of the week. I was horrified when they called to tell me that the two boys who were being disruptive had been asked to leave.

I was very angry with them and said she wouldn't be attending any longer and shame on them for asking the two boys to leave. The better way to have handled the situation would have been for them to have more helpers with a better attitude that didn't set these boys off to show temper when not approached correctly. I told them I believed that my daughter would get better attention at another school where there were better instructors and staff.

For you little guy it could be a case of zero tolerance for physical contact. They may have used the word "hitting" but it may include pushing, getting into others personal space, and I am not sure how one runs up and hits someone as a way to say hi. Zero tolerance policy may have been in the contract. They have an obligation to send all children home happy and secure that they are safe from being pushed down, punched or otherwise physically harmed. Just think how you would have gone off if you son came home with a knot on his head or a black eye and were told another child punched him. Your first question would be "why is this tolerated?"

To stop the hitting when you don't see the behavior at home you can do the following

~don't allow rough housing where dad or siblings pretend punch of beat up each other

~don't allow fist bump as the major way to greet each other

~kids that age are able to understand stories and put themselves in the "what if" situation. So you can play, "what if you had a toy and a little boy took it from you, what would you do"? This allows them to be emotionally prepared for such things before they occur

~take out books from the library on friendship and how to be a good friend.

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