Diane - posted on 01/19/2013 ( 6 moms have responded )
I'm not using real names here. We all make mistakes and I've made a huge one! In 2011 I broke up with a married man Jay i was seeing, tried getting back with an ex boyfriend Walter, and ended up sleeping with a 2nd cousin Tommy. Well needless to say I found out in July that I was pregnant. At first Tommy said he was fixed not to worry, that's also why he didn't use a condom. Well half way through he calls me drunk and tells me he lied that he really isn't fixed, I freaked out and started talking to my cousin Silas. Well he calmed me down to where I stopped thinking "what if's", that my life couldn't be that messed up that my cousin would turn out to be my sons dad. Well I had my son and got Walter tested he came back as not the father, then I had Jay tested and was shocked to learn he wasn't the father! After Jay's test came back i talked to a friend Ricky who said we may have had sex but I honestly didn't think we did. But I didn't want to deal with Tommy being the father right then so I got Ricky tested, of course he came back as not the father. Well I was finally faced with the horrible truth! I was devastated, depressed, I didn't know what to do. I called Tommy and told him he was a father again, after 30+yrs. Tommy is about 20yrs older then me, married, and they have 1 child who is a yr younger then me. Tommy came over one day to talk he looked at the baby who was about 6 months then said "he don't look nothing like me he ain't mine, lets have sex" I told him " isn't the fact we have one kid and fucked up everybody's lives enough I'm not doing it again". That was in August 2012 I thought long and hard about what to do. Do I raise my son and let the truth come out on its own? Since our son looked like him it was going to come out. Yes hes my cousin but the baby has no reason to look like that side of the family. Or do I get a dna test and the state goes after him for child support. If I do go for the dna test do I wait until after the holidays or just do it and not care about holidays? Well I finally decided and sent in the request for dna test. The day he got the papers for the appointment he called me up begging me to cancel it, since hi and the wife were already fighting see she got the mail that day! He told her that he had no clue why I was doing the dna test that I must be pissed at him for some reason. Well he did the test he IS my sons father, and we have child support hearing this week. I am still upset over my part in this whole mess.