Weird/scary things an almost 4 yo says

Lynn - posted on 02/11/2014 ( 7 moms have responded )

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My daughter told me last night that her butt hurt because she has dirty (sometimes says bloody) icicles in it. Where would a almost 4 year old get that?? She has a vivid imagination though. Should I be nervous? She is only around immediately family and really really close friends (besides Kindercare daycare). This is the only time she has said this and has not said it again this am.

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/11/2014

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First, she's obviously said this on more than one occasion. You cite that she says she has "dirty (sometimes says bloody)" which means that this is happening on a fairly regular basis, if she's sometimes saying one thing, and sometimes another.

Take her to the pediatrician. Have her examined for possible abuse. Also address the constipation with the pediatrician.

Honey, I hate to be the one to tell you, but molestation happens most frequently by a trusted family adult (Dad, Grandpa, Uncle, Aunt, Mom, Grandma) or very close, trusted family friend. My husband, an adult survivor of extreme sexual abuse, was violated by his father. It happens. It's not impossible, and while you want to always think that your family couldn't be 'that way', it's also better to be sure. AND...If your husband is 'embarrassed' by his almost 4 year old...that is a warning sign as well.

It's hard to hear, it's hard to think that you may possibly have to face that, but if you DO NOT face this and get things checked out, and then you subsequently find out years later that she WAS being molested, you'd never forgive yourself.

Jackie - posted on 02/11/2014

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Please, Please get your daughter checked out!! I am just an outsider I know, but better to be safe than sorry!!! My husband would never think anything of seeing his children naked, he has bathed them for goodness sake, My daughters are now older but when they were little, noo, noo that is definitely NOT normal behavior of a father to get red faced and embarrassed! And for goodness sake don't delay! You are her mother, her protector, you in your heart should know if somethings not right.

Kimily - posted on 02/12/2014

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My (soon-to-be) step son has always had problems going to poop. We literally have to bribe him and he is almost 7. It sounds like your daughter is the same way! Speaking from a little experience, dealing with that kind of stuff myself, same symptoms and it was internal hemorrhoids. Does she wipe herself? because, if so, she could possibly have the "dirty icicles" from not getting herself completely clean sometimes. Hope this helps a little.

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Lynn - posted on 02/11/2014

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My hubby is only embarrassed when she sees his privates and mentions she sees them. I have spoken to a social worker that specializes in children that are abused. She is someone I trust to protect children. She came over and asked me a lot of questions (as well as talked to my daughter) and has determined that there isn't concern for abuse. She determined it is just my daughter putting her knowledge of icicles and my time of month to explain the pain of going poop. She knows sometimes when one gets hurt they bleed and assumed one always bleeds when hurt. (She recently cut her chin and saw the blood also). She recently found out icicles can be sharp and if fall can cut/hurt a person. She also checked her out physically and can't see any signs either. My daughter's personality hasn't changed either - a big sign of abuse.

Thank you for the advice. I am glad I got it checked out.

Lynn - posted on 02/11/2014

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The only ones she is left alone with is Daddy, Mimi and Aunt Sue. The people at the Kindercare and then her new babysitter (A lady with 2 kids of her own). I know it isn't my hubby because he gets totally embarrassed when he even sees her naked (face turns red). I forgot to mention she does say her butt stings sometimes when she poops and she poops big and never wants to poop.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/11/2014

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A child would get that from being molested.

And, I hate to say this, but immediate family is usually the main suspect body in cases like these.

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