What age to you let your kids use a highway reststop restroom alone

Reggy - posted on 01/12/2011 ( 13 moms have responded )

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Last week My 10 year old son and I went to meet some of my high school friends. It was the first time they met him. On the way home we both needed to pee. I was in bad area so took him to the ladies room with me we peed washed our hands and headed home and no had no problems. Does Anyone else take there 10 year old the ladies room in bad area.

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JuLeah - posted on 04/20/2011

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In some cases I'd take him in with me, in some cases, I'd knock on the door of the men's room to confirm no one was in there and stand outside the door waiting for him. Age 10, in our American culture is pushing the limits. I agree, in other places it would be fine to take him with you, but not always is it here.



It is not about trusting your kid, but the situation. Teach you kid to trust themselves, listen to their gut. If they meet up with someone who gives them a bad feeling, teach them to walk back to you.



Also, not sure what you mean by 'bad area' when the reality is that kids are abducted, abused, and even killed in ALL neighborhoods.



We put our kids in danger when we base our trust level on misconceptions and stereotypes over fact, gut, common sense, and reality.



So, the wealthy looking guy, clean cut, wearing a nice suit, might be far more dangerous for your kid then the dude with the baseball cap, torn jeans, and no shoes.



A friend of a little girl in my care said some disturbing things to me about her father. Two days later, I could not get her words out of my head. I called the school counselor to share my concern and was told I had nothing to worry about what that family, “They are a good Christian family” I was told, therefore unable, I guess to harm their child.



I know folks that will hire a white baby sitter without really checking references, but will double check on any sitter with dark skin.



I am not saying this is you, please understand. I am saying it is never about neighborhood or appearance. Monsters are everywhere and hide among us in plain sight.

Tracy - posted on 01/13/2011

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In that situation, yeah I'd probably do the same. But in general, I do the "hover-mother" when I send my 9 yr old into a public men's room. I'm right outside the door and if I feel he's taking too long I crack it open and holler in until I hear he's ok. And I've no qualms walking into a men's room if I feel the need.

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Stifler's - posted on 04/20/2011

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If it was in a bad area as you call it, I wouldn't give it a second thought bringing him to the ladies room to make sure he was safe. If it was in Emerald he can go to the mens room haha.

Amy - posted on 04/20/2011

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Never alone. lol. I mean, obviously there will come a time, but My goodness I wouldn't even want to stop at one alone. Family is luckily two boys, three girls, so not likely any of us will be alone. But, I'd certainly do what you did and take in with me if at all possible. or i'd be right outside that door guarding it.

Mary1959 - posted on 04/20/2011

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i think best thing is to build one set of unsex restroom where both sexes uses it at the same time

[deleted account]

I would... and I'm often against that sort of thing. It wasn't until I was around 14 that I went into a rest stop bathroom alone... needless to say I was always with my mom or sister in the womens. My dad would wait for me outside the bathroom, once I turned 14 and traveled alone with him.

A lot of newly built reststops have family restrooms.

Mary1959 - posted on 04/20/2011

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my son is 8 and daughter is 9
when me and my hubby and kids are trip
either i take them to the women restroom or he take them to menroom at the reststop

Sherri - posted on 01/14/2011

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Most definitely!! I still took my 11yr old son with me when we traveled in a busy train station. You did the right thing mom.

Medic - posted on 01/13/2011

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That is a question that really made me think. My son is four so he still goes to the ladies room with me unless we are somewhere with other men in which I let them take him because he feels like a 'big' boy. I don't know at what age I would let him go totally by himself. In that exact situation I would have done the exact same thing but now you have me thinking at what age should I just let him go to the mens room say in like walmart or target??

Renae - posted on 01/13/2011

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I live in Perth Australia, a very small capital city compared to most cities. About 2 years ago in a small suburban shopping centre in a nice area a dad was shopping with his 12 year old daughter. He let her go to the ladies on her own and he sat on a bench on the other side of the mall and watched the ladies room. Somehow a man took the girl out of the ladies room and into the disabled toilet and raped and murdered her and noone saw or heard anything. She was only gone 10 minutes when the dad went looking for her and found her.

I dont know if there is ever a safe age to use a public restroom on your own. I certainly would not mind at all if a mother brought a 10 or even 13 year old son into the ladies room.

Laura - posted on 01/13/2011

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You have to do what you deem is safest for everyone. Normally it would be best for him to use the mens' room, but this seems to be a special circumstance. Safety comes first! I have a daughter so this hasn't been a problem with me. Though in the past her dad has done the "hover" thing outside the ladies' bathroom. Unfortunately his actions are often perceived as more threatening than when a woman does this at the mens' restroom! It's still about providing safety to our kids though.

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