what are her fathers legal rights?

Charlotte - posted on 08/27/2013 ( 12 moms have responded )

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My daughter is a year and almost 4 months. her father and i have agreed on visitation but have never gone through court. When she was born he denied her so we got a paternity test and now hes paying child support, her last name is mine. what i want to know is does he have any rights to her? any at all? please help and thank you!

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/05/2013

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Why should I enroll in a site that is not for my gender? And now that I can see how old you are indicating that you are (middle school, if I may say, for your snarky answer about spelling another's name correctly)...

I advocate parenting rights ms. torbio, not that the mother is always 100% correct. No breather needed here. I just try to stop people from taking advice that will get them into legal trouble, which yours would have. THERE IS NO RELATIONSHIP between support and visitation. If you'd been in the situation, you'd understand that.

The father has every right to a relationship with their child, just as the mother. Yes, both should financially support said child.

Oh, and BTW??? I'm speaking from the POV of having paid support for a child that was never allowed to have a relationship with her biological father, because this happened before father's rights were considered important.

Now that they ARE considered important, I advocate for them. Just because I'm the mom doesn't mean I don't feel that equal parental rights are important. Just because I'm a female, I don't automatically assume that all moms are 100% in the right.

Keep up the comedy though ms. torbio, because I am thoroughly enjoying the amusement.

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Lol Shawn...I like spelling it better that way .... Ok so you are correct and I am in agreement that it takes two to create....but it also takes two to financially support the child!!.....besides you're getting all worked up when this is a place where we are entitled to our opinion....Charlotte is gonna choose what she sees fit to do with her child and it's out of our hands.... So take a breather my dear. Not everyone is always in agreement.

P.s last I knew this site is called circle of moms ....maybe you should find a circle for dads.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/05/2013

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No, my dear Corin, you are not "siding" with facts. Care to site your sources?

There is a paternity result in place.

Besides that, it does take 2 parents (or at the very least egg and sperm) to create a child. That is a contribution from a male and a female. So, it takes 2 for the creation, why should those two not have equal rights to their child?

FACT: That's how a judge will look at it. Both parents have equal rights to their child. Until one or the other signs rights away, that's the way it is. With proven paternity, the male in the situation is well within his legal rights to exert his paternity.

But, hey, you go ahead and keep your kids away from their fathers, regardless of the legal decision.

PS. It's not so difficult to spell someone's name correctly when it's on the screen in front of you....

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 11/05/2013

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LOL... "definitely not true if he isn't paying child support he doesn't get to see his kids....period"

What planet do you reside on, Corina? That's not the way it works in most of the US, and from what I understand most of the civilized countries on earth...Support & visitation are two separate and unrelated concerns.

Ashleigh, it doesn't matter whether he's on the BC or not. Paternity has been proven. He's (at this point) got as much "right" to the child as she does.

Charlotte, quit putting it off, go to court, get support & visitation set up. You will all be happier in the long run to have this straightened out.

[deleted account]

That's definitely not true if he isn't paying child support he doesn't get to see his kids....period

Ev - posted on 08/29/2013

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Charlotte--These ladies speak the truth. Forget about what his rights are compared to yours. Right now as has been said, you both have the same rights to have this child with you all the time. GO GET THE COURT ORDER. That is the only way to solve this mess. If you don't he can do what he wants when he wants and you can not do anything about it unless you have a court order saying who has her primary and who has her secondary. This is not about you or him but the baby. Any man who is a father has the same rights as any woman who is the mother of said child or children.

Jodi - posted on 08/29/2013

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Well, he has the same rights as you do, so if you sent her to dad, he could refuse to send her back. I think you need to get your legal documentation in place, because it sounds like the child will end up the pawn in the middle if this is the case, and that isn't fair to your child. I am not sure of the process where you live. Here in Australia, no lawyers are needed to go through the mediation process and come up with a parenting plan that will be recognised by the courts, so it can be a very inexpensive process. The best thing for you to do is find out what the choices are where you live and get visitation/custody sorted out.

Amy - posted on 08/29/2013

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Yes he has the same rights to her as you do, and your daughter more importantly has the right to have both parents involved. And even if he wasn't paying child support he still has the right to see his daughter, even if he denied her initially, the courts won't even consider that as a factor.

Charlotte - posted on 08/29/2013

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I dont want to deny him visitation because i do very firmly believe it is better for my daughter to know and have a relationship with him. I am asking because he is threatening to take her away from me, we have agreed to go to court eventually for joint custody but we are waiting because neither one of us can afford it right now. i just dont want to send her over there and him attempt to not give her back. what exactly are his rights? our "black and white" forms clearly state that he has to pay child support, he is her father and he has to provide insurance. that is all

Jodi - posted on 08/27/2013

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Yes, he has rights. Why would you deny him his rights? Or even more importantly, why would you deny HER her rights to know her father? As long as he can establish paternity, he has the same rights as you do.

You really should get this down on paper through the courts. That is best for everyone involved, because then there is no misunderstanding, and if there is, it is right there in black and white.

Kelsey - posted on 08/27/2013

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Having your last name has nothing to do with it. Same thing with the birth certificate. You have a paternity test; that's your prove. It's stated on paper that he's her father. He does have rights to her. You never established visitation/custody; only child support, which are two different topics in the court. So, legally he can take visitation and deny giving her back to you. Your law enforcement agency wouldn't be able to help at all. Personally, I would get everything all hashed out through court before allowing 'trusted' unsupervised visitation. Only reason being, custody/visitation papers only protects the child's best interest. I don't want to say anything that may get my head bit off by other mother's on here, but since he's financially support (doing his share), if you do take him to court, it will most definitely be joint custody; with beginning of supervised visitations, then unsupervised, eventually, probably be some overnights. Are you breastfeeding any? My ex wasn't able to take my son unsupervised until he was 6 months old because he was breastfeeding.

Ashleigh - posted on 08/27/2013

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There is proof he's the father so he can take you to court, however I don't think he would get very far if she has your surname, is he on the birth certificate?

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