What do u say to a mother that allows her children around porn....

[deleted account] ( 27 moms have responded )

I have a friend that has been aware of her husband pornography addiction for the last 12 yrs...the last year she found a camera hidden in the only bathroom in the house..then found evidence that he is watching porn while she is at work and he is watching the girls...this is the kicker..she found her youngest 5 made her own video..saying to kiss her privites....I want some opinions on..how could a mother allow this to continue .....in this situation..she is always making excuses why she is still with him.......I personally cant even talk to her knowing she isnt protecting her girls...I'm disgusted.........

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Sherre - posted on 04/29/2010

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You being her friend in this situation, I know you must feel horrible & uncomfortable with the fact that you could be sending a man to jail and having kids taken away but that is the best thing you can do. Their parents should be protecting them and they're not. And even though your friend isn't commiting the acts, she's still fully aware of what's going on and still allowing it. THAT IS SICK!!! Please, do what's best for these children and protect them because their own parents aren't. Call CPS & the police. Goodluck! I'll pray for you an those kids.

Charlene - posted on 04/29/2010

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This shouldn't even be a question, but since asked. YES!!! Call protective services. No child should ever have to suffer any sort of abuse like that - much less from their own parents! What if they were your children?? Someone needs to step up & take some responsibility for their well-being. Obviously their parents aren't willing to. You be there for them, PLEASE!

Jamie - posted on 04/28/2010

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Call protective services immediately! They can search his computer, regardless of if it's been "cleaned" most of the time. Someone has to stand up for those babies. If you don't, who will since their mother obviously isn't. If it were your children, what would you do? They can't protect themselves. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE help them!

Gwen - posted on 04/28/2010

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THAT IS SICK! CALL THE COPS and CHILDREN'S SERVICES IMMEDIATELY! You KNOW if he is watching those kids and making videos of them, he is also raping them. Child pornography, child endangering, sexual abuse... They both deserve to be in prison forever. Him for doing it and her for allowing it.

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[deleted account]

UPDATE;;;
I voiced my concerns and disgust and I truly thought she was leaving, she met w/ a lawyer, had a house that needed some repairs, I spent many days helping to repair and help her in this move. The oldest was finnally in consuling..then the excuses started, money excuses, he has an addication problem, etc.. which was all bullshit..the real kicker is, she calls herself a Master healer and Intuative medium..wants to heal the world one person at a time, just opened a healing center .I think she should be more concerned w/ the protection of her girls, but she wants to stay in that world, what, how am I to do??
She didnt like the reality of my concerns and deleted me from her life, I pray for the girls everyday, I was hoping this thread would find her, since she is on circle of moms ...Maybe her healing center will help heal herself so she can stop procastinating and take action.. I know that the oldest was in consuling, But my old friend of ten years is no more.....I can only pray that she finds the strength to stand up and protect her girls..........

Kathy - posted on 12/17/2011

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i'd say try to wake her up ! or let the cops wake her up.. do somethin' u have to talk to her or let someone else do it

Halie - posted on 07/11/2011

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CALL THE COPS these kids need to know that this is wrong and if the mother gets mad so what. save the kids from this and this dad HAS TO GO TO JAIL. i would call as soon as i found out whar was going on in the house. that's just sick and disgusting those poor kids

[deleted account]

This is a no-brainer...Call the police - if she wont protect them then someone else needs to. Porn is one thing but watching their kids is actually paedophilia and is acceptable under no circumstances! If they find evidence or anything suspicious then the police will get child protection involved.



Editted to include - dont give them a warning! All that will do is make it harder to remove the kids out of an unsafe environment as they will have time to destroy or hide any evidence. Call the police directly - Im sorry but if this Mum is aware of the abuse and hasnt done anything about it then she has just as much to answer for as her husband!

Shelley - posted on 04/29/2010

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Wow that sounds just sick. You need to call someone.

Woman unfortunetly sometimes stay with sick men even giving up their family. For the sake fof the children call someone asap.

Angie - posted on 04/29/2010

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Give her to the end of the day to call the police. If she doesn't do it, you need to.

Sarah - posted on 04/29/2010

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I agree completely! Call the COPS! and if you have any emails, texts or voicemails from your friend you need to show them to the police! having a camera in the bathroom is horrible! you should feel comfortable being in your own bathroom and not wondering who is watching whats going on! and who knows if he has uploaded the stuff from the camera onto the internet or not! and the fact that the little girl is saying things like that makes me wonder if he hasn't sexually abused her! The cops need to be called ASAP! obviously the mother isn't looking out for herself or her kids and someone needs to step up and do something about it! You wouldn't want to hear about it years down the road that the girls were sexually abused or that there was videos of them on the internet! so please, please, PLEASE call the cops!

Sarah - posted on 04/29/2010

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The kids need to be out of that situation, and the police need to called. This is the first thing to do.

Your friend will also need you support during this horrible time, as she's clearly not thinking straight. It will mean the end of her marriage, as I assume the police will not allow her husband to have contact with the children. She may be being controlled in some sort of way by him, and like a woman being abused, that stays with the abusive partner, it's a long slow healing process. A process where she will need friends that don't judge her for not being able to the right thing immediatly.

Please help those kids, as their mother doesn't seem capable, for whatever reason, of doing that.

Sarah

Katie - posted on 04/29/2010

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This is so beyond sick!!!!! you need to tell the police and CPS..These little girls need someone to be brave enough to stand up for them, for their futures...If you and the mother know that this is going on , then i hate to think what you dont know is happening , and if it hasn't yet, IT WILL!!!. Please be the voice that they dont have.. Dont let this go on!

[deleted account]

I agree with Louise, please let us all know what happens because i am so mad and cant believe this..you have the power to help and stop this.I wish more people were like you,so do something and dont allow it to continue.These children need to be safe and protected the need your help Diane.

Louise - posted on 04/29/2010

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I would not stand by and let this go on. Make an anonymous call to the protection services if she is not going to protect her children then you will have to. That child will be damaged for life if somebody does not help her. Pick up that phone now and give them all the information you have and then at least you know you have done everything in your power. I hope the child gets removed from the home and the mother should be locked up for neglect and allowing this abuse to go on! PLEASE PHONE TODAY AND LET US ALL KNOW SO WE CAN ALL SLEEP TONIGHT KNOWING THOSE GIRLS ARE SAFE!!!

Emma - posted on 04/29/2010

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This is terrible and I know it puts you in a tuff spot but you need to speak to someone for the childrens sake. If you find it hard to talk to the police try someone at the school, they will be able to counsell the children if needed and find out what is going on?

[deleted account]

If that were my husband i would of called the police and told them to get over fast before i kill my husband.

This is a very unhealthy environment to be bringing young impressionable children up in.

The mother is enabling her husband and i find it sick to have a camera in the bathroom,what the hell.If what you said is not on the grounds to get cps involved i dont know what is.Call cps&the police.



-Its past just a porn addiction its abuse to allow a child to watch it.

-Its sick and unacceptable to film children in that manner.

-Its not healthy to have children making up inappropriate films of themselves.

-Its not about this mother but about her children &you now..you have the responsibility to do something about what you know.

If the mother will not protect her kids YOU do it.

NO child DESERVES to be brought up in a home like this.The will grow up to believe this is normal and acceptable otherwise.



WHAT are YOU going to do is the QUESTION.

*Lisa* - posted on 04/29/2010

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Agree with the others. This is totally unacceptable!! And now that you are aware of what's happening it's your responsibility to those children to call the police. If you do nothing and look the other way, you are guilty of this abuse too.

Sarah - posted on 04/28/2010

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Wow, call CPS immediately. Lose a (obviously immoral) friend to save those kids from that abuse! Higher authorities need to convince her to either boot the scumbag or help find her children a new home.

Forcing a child to watch porn IS sexual abuse... If that is all the guy is doing, which I am betting it is not. They need to be removed from that environment immediately.

Joan - posted on 04/28/2010

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i agree call social services. they can involve the police there is def.abuse going on in that house,even if the kids were only allowed to watch

Firebird - posted on 04/28/2010

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I fully a gree with the other posters here, call cps and the police and do it ASAP.

Geralyn - posted on 04/28/2010

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Diane, its worse than allowing her children around porn. The children seem to be very much a part of what he is doing. How do you know he hasn't posted the video of the 5-year-old on some child porn website? These girls absolutely need protection, immediate protection. If you are hesitating on calling CPS, just think about some lecherous creep getting off to the video of the 5-year-old. The mom should not be so naive as to think that there is only one video. These girls are not safe in the current environment. I agree with the other poster that the mom is just as culpable - she cannot stick her head in the sand and not act.

Barbara - posted on 04/28/2010

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someone needs to be notified that is not a good situation for those children if the mom cant see that then she isnt doing her job as a parent.

Jenifer - posted on 04/28/2010

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you need to call child protective services If there mother won't protect them someone needs to.Please help them!!!

Tracy - posted on 04/28/2010

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Call the police and CPS NOW. She may very well go to jail too for NOT protecting her children. This is totally messed up. If she isn't going to protect them, then it behooves YOU to since you have the information. Those kids are going to be so messed up.

Sharon - posted on 04/28/2010

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Um - Those girls are lucky you're still talking to the parental figure.

You need to call the police, if you have emails from them, maybe get the computers' address (every computer has a unique signature) for them... if they give a shit about pornography, and um especially possibly child pornography.

Call CPS as well.

Melissa - posted on 04/28/2010

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Call Child Protective Services!!! This is not acceptable at all. I would never allow anyone to tape or watch my child do anything like that or would I let him act that way! Sorry I'm not trying to rude or anything I just hope YOU will not let it continue knowing what is going on.. if you do you are just as bad as she is. (Sorry I hope I don't offend you!!)

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