Ann - posted on 07/25/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )
My husband and I have been separated a year now. My 12 year old daughter spends every weekend with him. When she comes home on Sunday nights, she's got a big chip on her shoulder. When my husband and I were together, he often treated her like a friend and would talk to her about any arguments or disagreements we had while she was out of the house. She would promptly yell at me for arguing with daddy. I know she seems like an adult because she is very mature for her age but I think this is inappropriate. He's been doing this for years. We broke up because he was talking to another woman and did little to hide it. He ended up dating her for 6 months after I kicked him out and then she dumped him. (Karma!) Anyway, she comes home telling me that she doesn't want to be with me. She loves her father more and that she's a daddy's girl. I have made it a point not to put him down in front of her. Obviously he doesn't have the same respect for me. I've had numerous discussions with him about this and yet he still keeps doing it. My daughter is so confused. It takes me five days to get functioning with her and then she goes with him again. He undoes in two minutes what it takes me five days to accomplish with her. He doesn't want custody of her because he works full time and is living with his elderly parents. He has very few friends and was never in to doing things as a family anyway because he is always on the internet. I want to take her to counseling but he told her she didn't have to go and that it was "her" decision. Anyone going through similar issues and have any advice?