what do you do when your 4-month keeps crying if your not holding her?

Dustardi - posted on 04/05/2012 ( 17 moms have responded )

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my 4-month old wont let meput her down not even walk away from her for 5 minutes it gets frustrating sometimes when i have to prepare dinner or take some time to my self

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Isobel - posted on 04/05/2012

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That said, if you don't want to go that route, crying a few minutes isn't gonna kill anybody either (if you've got to get something done).

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Around this age is when the bouncer seat was my very best friend. Need a shower? Put the bouncer on the floor in the bathroom, turn on the flashy lights and/or music and scrub your butt while the baby amuses herself. I used to do the same if I was cooking. My son just liked being able to see me. But there are also times when they just want to be held. A lot. And that's ok too. Just breathe and know that it's just a phase that will pass......and one day, believe it or not....you'll miss it!

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Marina - posted on 04/05/2012

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involve grand parents if possible. i remember my son at that age didn't care whose shoulder he's sleeping on. so i would just put him on grandma and go about taking care of my other son.

Dorothy - posted on 04/05/2012

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Also, about 4 months he started noticing what was on TV. I discovered he loved Dora the Explorer. I could often put him in the Bumbo, go pee, start dinner and check back with him with out him crying. At 6 months I got him a jumperoo. He loved it immediately, my only regret with the jumperoo is that I didn't get it at 4 months when he was 1st able to sit up. That and Dora would sometimes get me a whole 30 minutes. He still loved that thing long after he could walk. I was sad that he got too tall for it.

Dorothy - posted on 04/05/2012

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I dealt with this with my son. He's great but he was a difficult infant. he never ever wanted to be alone. He's 3 and he is still afraid to be alone. definitely a sling, carrier, etc. Helps to get things done. For showering, going to the bathroom, other stuff you can't do with the baby, I found making the tv a little louder, and being quick as possible helps.



As for alone time, I used to get LO to sleep for nap time on the couch. He wouldn't sleep more then 5 minutes in a crib/pack-n-play, but if he was on the couch and startled awake he was usually able to be soothed back to sleep. I could get me time, it wasn't perfect, but, it was time I could devote to reading, tv, phone calls, or using the computer.

Marina - posted on 04/05/2012

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put her in the sling or carrier and continue doing what your are doing (dinner, cleaning). she is what Sears calls "high-need baby". she needs you more than the average baby. you just accept it, get used to it and move on adjusting your life

Sherri - posted on 04/05/2012

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Let her cry for a few minutes sometimes you have too, it won't hurt her.

Heather - posted on 04/05/2012

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Then you put her down, do what you have to do, and you let her cry. I hate to sound cruel, but you gotta do what you gotta do. Putting her in a swing while you shower or cook can help too. She will get used to it. It sucks hearing her cry, but she will stop sooner or later when she gets it into her head that you are coming back for her.

Michelle - posted on 04/05/2012

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I have 6 kids and the youngest is 6 months now. While you want to put her down without her crying, she isn't ready for that yet. You'll just have to be patient with her. All of the other suggestions are great. I strap my youngest to my back to cook dinner/lunch, fold laundy, etc. She has sat in a walker for 2 mons with blankets holding her up so she could see. However, it is just the nature of the beast at this age to want to be with you and comforted. No one can take your place in her life so once she realizes you will come back, it'll stop. Like the other ladies said, it'll happen any time now.

Krista - posted on 04/05/2012

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Yeah, I would try carrying her in a sling or carrier, and if you have to put her down and she cries, then so be it. Do you have something that can amuse her when you're not holding her, like one of those baby gyms? It might keep her distracted enough for you to at least grab 5 minutes of peace.

[deleted account]

If you have to put her down for 5 minutes (to pee or something) just do it and get it done. Otherwise... hold her so she doesn't have to cry. She's 4 months old. She's perfectly normal and needs you.

Lady Heather - posted on 04/05/2012

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My younger daughter was the same until a couple weeks ago (she is 5.5 months now). I had her in the carrier as much as possible and for cooking I did once a month freezer meals. It's really helpful but you do need a whole day with baby help for cooking. It was great though because all I needed to do for dinners was throw a pan in the oven. No crying! Check out www.onceamonthmom.com.



The phase shouldn't last too much longer. At four months they still have a hard time manipulating objects and moving. Once they are able to play a little more they get better at amusing themselves for a couple if minutes.

Dustardi - posted on 04/05/2012

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when i do that it keeps her quiet but i want to be able to walk away from her and put her down without her cryin

Chrystal - posted on 04/05/2012

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Have you tried a sling or carrier they helped me get things done when my kids where going through the clingy stage. Maybe a swing in the kitchen when you cook so she can be with you and moving might work as well. Otherwise as long as all her basic needs are met if you've got to put her down to do something well that's how it is and a few minutes isn't going to hurt her even if she screams like it does. I've got 2 kids and as much I don't like hearing them cry I can't do everything at once and picking them up isn't always top on the need list.

Louise - posted on 04/05/2012

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My daughter was the same it is only a phase. I bought a baby harness and strapped her to me whilst I did the dinner or took her into the kitchen with me in her bouncy chair. I also bought a walker and propt her up with a folded towel to support her. This way she was up right and able to play with the toys stuck to the tray whilst I got on with things. My daughters problem was acid reflux and whenever led down her tummy would hurt so when I picked her up to comfort her the pain would go away because she was upright. So she just taught herself that mum was the place to be.

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