What do you do when your toddler is being bullied by another toddler?

Doreen - posted on 03/01/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )




What do you do when your toddler is being hit randomly by a bully in class? He slaps, pushes and kicks all the kids in class and some of the kids are afraid to go to school.
They are all 2-3 year olds and there are 12 of them in class.


Louise - posted on 03/02/2011




This child needs to be excluded and then may be his mother will get the message that this has to stop. If a child was repeatedly hit other children then he was excluded for three days, if his behaviour did not improve his mother would be asked to stay and observe the child and modify his behaviour, if he hit out again the child would be permanently removed from the playgroup. It is a safety issue for the other children and at the end of the day if the mother can not stop this child from doing this then there is a serious problem going on here. In five years we never had to go as far as asking a child to leave the exclusion was enough.

User - posted on 03/03/2011




I think exclusion is rather harsh for one so young. After all, how are children supposed to learn social interaction skills if they are completely removed for the situation where they can develop them.

Extra supervision is a good idea, and working with the parent is also a good way forward, especially as she acknowledges there is a problem as well.

Hopefully, with the right input, this will turn out to be a phase that a lot of toddlers go through.

Sharon - posted on 03/02/2011




Our son was involved in his first 'argument' at daycare yesterday. They other child started it, and our son didn't back down, they were pushing each other (over a toy the other child wanted from our son), then the other child scratched our boys face (5 scratches, one quite deep). The other mum was called when it occured, and spoken to when she pciked up her little one. We have been told that if the same child does this a second time within 4wks then further action will be taken. Not exactly sure what that entails, but I imagine maybe some further discipling or maybe time off from the daycare.

I think this is a situation where the carers have to step in, especially if it's an ongoing thing that the child continually does.

Kimberly - posted on 03/01/2011




Is this a daycare/preschool situation? The staff need to have a meeting with the child's parents and they need to come to an agreement on how to handle it. Most likely the child needs one-to-one shadowing to figure out what triggers his anger/frustrations so they can better redirect his behaviour when he acts out.


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Doreen - posted on 03/02/2011




Thank you all for your reponses! We spoke to the headmistress today and they acknowledged the fact that this boy will need extra supervision especially at the playground. We will told that the boy's mom in fact mentioned that his son will hit her at home if he doesnt have his way and her time-out strategty is not working. We were told that she's been advised to work on the disciplinary issues at home and for a start, the school will arrange another 3rd teacher to spend time with him a day a week to see how things go. We're not sure if this will help at all ?

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