WHAT DOES IT MEAN-SECURITY ITEMS/DAD

Jackie - posted on 07/05/2014 ( 5 moms have responded )

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my step daughter is 19 months old. She has been bringing a puppy to all exchanges and it goes with her when she goes to school and with us. At first she would not let it out of her sight or anyone touch it. However the last few weeks she has been giving it to me to hold and walking away. What's up with that?
Also when her dad tries to sit next to me and her she will push him away until he's far enough where she sits w me. I honestly stay in the background a LOT to let him be the primary parent and foster a relationship but it seems she's more comfortable w a female presence. Is there something else I should be doing?

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Jackie - posted on 07/05/2014

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Chet I've had a "wicked" step mom growing up who made my father choose between her kids and us and unfortunately I do not have a relationship with my dad because of her. I know what it's like growing up with feeling like you have to choose and I never EVER want to be responsible or the reason a child suffers like I did.

Chet - posted on 07/05/2014

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The best thing that you and her dad can do is follow her lead. You can't really push yourself on a toddler, or force a toddler to go to somebody. Just continue to make sure her dad does as much as possible.

This little girl is very fortunate to have such a sensitive and aware step mom.

Jackie - posted on 07/05/2014

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Thanks Chet! I just wanteded to make sure I wasnt overstepping my role as a step patent

Chet - posted on 07/05/2014

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Your daughter sounds very normal. It sounds like she's needing her security object less, which is fine. As for her preferring you, that's pretty common. Lots of babies and toddlers prefer mom. All four of our kids were like that even though their dad was hugely involved, worked from home, had lots of time off of work, etc. It changes. All our house, dad usually became the preferred parent around age 2 or 3.

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