what to do

Isobell - posted on 04/21/2011 ( 5 moms have responded )




hubby making me chose between our 17&15 yrd and 4yrd and 12 yrd because he desided to leave me to buy new home and work else were hes taken the two younger ones even wheni i said no please dont and know he got himself a gf because i want go but said if at anytime u want to come he will just get ride of her and shes only there to take care of kids cook and clean and be his bed hes just told me that he will let me know if our marrage is worth saving and if he decides it is then he wants to come back to me im hurting like hell and im so confuessed about about hes doing but it gets worse this is just to give u an ideai hes very controling and im happys hes gone but i try to keep the peace for the kids and get sucked back in only to have him shut me down again losing days and cant go forward help


View replies by

Nikki - posted on 04/22/2011




You need to get a lawyer and discuss your legal rights. Try and get custody of your children and get this man out of your life. You deserve to be happy

Isobell - posted on 04/22/2011




thanks louise but sending a message like that to him will make things worse hes told me so in the past but i hear what u saying he plays mind games and im so scared i will loose them foreva trust me i dont want him back its been 12mths now and this is still going on im a mess family dont have them about friends are to far away when i try to get things right and head in the right directsion with setting this up for court i feel im doing wrong and ive faild the family silly i know but cant stop the thinking and the words in my head thanks for ur reply i will just have to be strong as u said

Louise - posted on 04/22/2011




This man is treating you like a slave. NEVER consider going back to him, you do need legal advice on how to either maintain contact or get your kids back. He had no right to take them from the family home. You really do need some support around you at the moment. Have you got any relatives around you to help support you emotionally? Your older children are fine they understand what dad is doing and you do not have to keep the peace for them. The fact he has moved another woman in is an insult to the marriage. If I were you I would send him a message of see you in court! You need to stand up to him and be strong, the kids will respect you more for fighting for them then going back and being down trodden and unhappy. They will grow up and leave home leaving you with this dick head! No you stay strong girl you deserve better.

Cherie - posted on 04/21/2011




get out of the marriage there is no since in staying it is clear that he does not love you, and even if you stayed together he would adventually do it again. You also should not have to choose between your children, they should all be with you not just half of them and seperating them wouldn't be good for them, the 17yr old however is old enough to make up his/her own mind which parent he/she wants to go with. I myself just went threw a divorce after being married for 18 years and him cheating, ultimately he left me again for another woman which he was cheating with, now 99% of the time the juge on a divorce will aware the woman custody of the children, and make the x pay child support, also if it does come to a divorce please hire a lawyer to defend youself cause you could be denied things that you should legally get if you don't and most of the time you can have to lawyer make the x pay for your attorney fees.
Please don't take this as me telling you to do what i said but i have learned from experience that men like that do not change. Also fight for you children.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms