what to do if fighting in home with wife and son

Dipak - posted on 10/21/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )




all way my wife fighting with me when my son come from school / and see dont want do sex also i dont no why /when i ask her she told me i dont like / she can do any thing but i cant do ---alway money money


The - posted on 10/22/2014




1. Start a weekly family meeting where each household member is required to attend. Give each member of your household a notebook to keep notes or do activities that will be done in the family meeting.
2. In the first family meeting have each family member write down what they feel the responsibilities of each family member are.
3. Remember you are only responsible to provide NEEDS: SHELTER, FOOD, EDUCATION, and CLOTHING (good quality but does not have to be name brand), A means of having them earn an allowance.
4. For your children it is their responsibility to care for their part of the shelter provided for their personal use, their items that they own and to be taken care, to care for the clothing provided, to eat the meals put before them, and to study and gain the education they need for their future.
5. If your wife does not work and is a house wife then her main responsibilities will be to care for the home, prepare meals and to be there for the children while you are at work. If the children are in school and she is able to take care of the household then she may be allowed to consider a part time job outside the home so long as it frees her to be home before the children arrive home. Also it will give her the ability to earn the money for the extra things she wants.
6. Remember you cannot buy a bunch of things for yourself that is not a NEED as above or for your WORK which helps you provide for your family without considering the future NEEDS: SHELTER, FOOD, EDUCATION, and CLOTHING (good quality but does not have to be name brand), A means of having them earn an allowance. Start separate savings accounts for your children's future college education. Make a savings account for your 1 year worth of emergency NEEDS FUNDS for a time when there be a emergency. You can slowly save up for this so that you will have it to fall on in times of emergency.
7. How to manage your money just a suggestion:
a. 10% of your gross to God
b. Pay all your bills
Then with what remains do the following"
a. 10% of what remains to: Special savings account for children's college
b. 10% of what remains to: Special savings for 1 year worth of bills & emergency
c. 10% of what remains to: To you for your allowance
d. 10% put away to buy a birthday, anniversary present etc for a family member. Why not also limit it to where each family member receives only one gift for their birthday, anniversary, or other gift giving holiday. This also makes it so they have to really think about what they want for their gift.
e. 10% of what remains to: To your wife if she meets her responsibilities of caring for the house and your children while you are at work. If she fails in her responsibilities then she forfeits her allowance. If children are all school age then she can get a parttime job for the time they are in school so long as she is home before the children and can still care for the home if she wants more money. If she bugs you for more simply state that you have to make sure that the needs have to be met first and you can only give her what is allotted for her after everyone's needs has been met. Her responsibilities does not include sex. If you want that then you need to treat her as if she has some worth and value in your life. Compliment her and if you treated her with money and gifting her all the time before you married you are guilty of setting up the type of wife you wanted her to be to begin with instead of showing her you loved her by complimenting her and treating her with care and respect. Being there for her to listen when she has problems. OR you stopped showing her compliments and how you care and she is using money to compensate for what you fail to give her. Either way a woman will not want to have sex unless she is made to feel that she is wanted and desired and told how beautiful she is.
f. Children and allowance: $1 a week for each child age 5 and under, $2 a week for each child age 10 and under, $4 a week for each child age 12 and under, $6 a week for each child age 14 and under, $8 a week for each child age 16 and under, $10 a week for each child age 18 and under, If they want something special they can save up to buy it so they learn to earn money to buy what they want. To receive the allowance they have to keep their bedrooms clean, keep their items picked up and put away when done with them, eat the meals provided without complaining, keep good grades in school, and one chore that benefits everyone in the household as their responsibilities. During the summer they can do extra things to earn money to buy things they want. SUCH AS: ANY TOYS AND GAMES THEY NO LONGER PLAY WITH OR OTHER ITEMS THEY DO NOT USE????
They can have a garage sale. So can your wife for all the excess stuff she has and you as well. It can be a great education process for each family member and they have to be there to bargain with people in the sale of their items in the garage sale. Get a receipt book for them to use that makes carbon copies. They are to make a receipt for the purchaser and list the item sold for how much and make sure it makes a carbon copy. The money they collect then goes into the lock box. When the garage sale is over you can then teach them how money is managed by counting up the total on the receipts and counting the money to see that it matches, If it does not match up then you can ask if anyone has any of the money they forgot to put in the box. In this way you are teaching them integrity in business as well,
There is a lot of ideas I could give you but the key thing you need to have in all of your lives is God. Watch Joyce Meyer Ministries ON YOUTUBE https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCER2LBsm4hB_Kxte63RoftQ OR
THE WEBSITE http://joycemeyer.org/broadcasthome.aspx
May God bless you.

1 Comment

View replies by

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms