what to do with a out of control 14 year old girl.

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016 ( 33 moms have responded )

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I have punished her ,whooped her talk to her even put her out , but she steal from my house talkin back very disrespectful to me and my other child in the home. I'm looking for a place for her to stay I don't no longer want her in my house . I have been thru a lot with her and I'm tired , please give me a place for her to go .

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Michelle - posted on 08/26/2016

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Abuse a moderator, suffer the consequences. I have removed her posting privileges for at least 24 hours.
Michelle,
WtCoM Mod.

Jodi - posted on 08/25/2016

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"I don't need that from a person that's on the internet trying to tell me what I should do ."

Uh....you came here for advice on how to give your child away. If I have something to say about that, then I can. It's a public forum on the internet. Exactly what responses did you think you were going to get other than from a person on the internet? Of COURSE you were going to get advice from "a person that's on the internet". And of COURSE you were going to get parenting advice, because this is an issue of parenting the child that you clearly need assistance with.

As I said, when you bring a child into the world, you don't get to just give them away when things don't go right. THAT makes you a crappy parent. You asked what you should do to help her now - and you have received advice around that, you just are choosing to ignore it. What you should do for her now is PARENT her, not give her away.

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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Maybe if you would type in coherent sentences and answer legitimate questions you wouldn't get misunderstood...

If you have to hit a teenager... you are a failure as a parent. That is my opinion and I will not apologize for it. If I hit my teenagers... I would expect to get hit back. Just as if they hit me they would expect to have the police called and have me press charges... because assaulting your family is unacceptable and shows tremendous disrespect.

You came on here... we did not come to you. If you do not want to be here feel free to deactivate your account. All we are doing is posting on the thread that YOU started.

Michelle - posted on 08/25/2016

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So do you now have a child posting for you?
If you didn't want advice then why post asking for advice?
Look at the title of this post: "What to do with an out of control 14 year old girl."
That is asking for advice and you were getting it.
Don't get your kids to respond negatively either. That last comment shows that there is more going on in the household than what you told us. Kids need to get their attitude in check.

Michelle - posted on 08/25/2016

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Tina: FYI, Jodi and Dove are 2 different people.
YOU came here and asked a question and these ladies have been trying to be nice to you and all you have done is put down their responses and called them stupid.
Please read the no T.H.U.M.P.S policy that you agreed to when you joined this site.
When you ask a question on a public forum, you may get responses you don't like. That's life and the chance you take. Both of these women have been single mothers to teenagers so they know a bit about the subject.
I suggest reading what they have written instead of getting your back up. Something has gone wayward with your daughter and sometimes it helps to have an outsider give suggestions.

33 Comments

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Jodi - posted on 08/25/2016

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OMG, that went crazy! Funny as shit.....after my day at work, the laugh was great! Thanks Tina!

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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By the way... since you clearly can't read I said IF I hit them or they hit me... it doesn't happen... it hasn't happened.... it would never happen because my daughters have 100% respect for me and I for them. Clearly logic and comprehensive sentences are too complicated for you to grasp though.. Go ahead and laugh, but hopefully some day you will remember the fact that you came here w/ complaints about YOUR out of control child... she got that way somehow sweetheart and it wasn't from me... and I'm on here bragging about my awesome teenage daughters.... ;)

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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Dang... I totally missed the last 3 of her incoherent rambling posts.

Hi Shawnn. I was wondering how long it would take you to show up. Gotta love these, huh?

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/25/2016

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How fucking ridiculous are you going to get? FYI, Michelle is a moderator here. She told you to back off on the violations of site policy, and you call HER stupid? Pot, meet kettle.

Stop wasting our time. Your 14 YO is likely out of control because her parental example is no better. Since you can't parent without assaulting your kid, no wonder she's taken to hanging with the wrong crowd.

You said she knows who her father is, so rescind your rights to him. She deserves better.

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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Not that it's any of your business, but I'm 39... almost 40. I'm not a computer. I'm a human being typing on a computer.

I would have attempted to give you advice if you would have told me what else you had tried other than hitting her or throwing her out. It's pointless to give advice to someone that doesn't want to hear it or will just make excuses about why the advice won't work.

Why am I here? Well, I do try and give advice on situations when it is something I know or can relate to... Then a poster like you comes along and I am here for the pure entertainment value. Watching people freak out and go bonkers when you call them on their crap is rather fun.

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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You don't see me tagging other internet people in it's just me , I don't need 2 other internet people texting for me get that right first before you try and be smart with it lol

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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To the other Michelle willid , I don't know you and your comment sounds crazy ,only y'all people let y'all kids hit them, I don't play that period , and I told the police and your point would be ? Y'all probably don't have kid's trying to tell another person how to parent their kid , this site is crappy..bye ..

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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Ummm dove...omg ..how old are you ? This is what you do for a living? Cause right now I'm a better parent then probably you , I'm not asking a computer to tell me something .

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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You came here for... what again? You still haven't answered why you posted or what you hoped to gain from posting?

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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Look who ever you are , my mother only asked what she wanted to say not to here some sorry ass story bout make her clean n go to bed That's what y'all do , so as of now don't text her with this crappy shit , nobody is beating on that child if she's acting up then we handle our different , bye

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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She has to have a phone for school for emergency situations are you not completely understanding what the story is and you don't know , I don't know about your mom situations but I'm different from you , this site is worthless why am misinterpreting in this crappy site .

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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Uh.... I parent my kids maybe you don't that's not my problem , if I wanted to here crappy people tell me something then I should have asked a better web site not one with the same person .

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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lol Cute... The same person as what? You are making zero sense. I tried to help. I tried to get more information so that I could perhaps offer some advice that you have not tried in order to HELP YOUR CHILD (which I thought that was why you posted) and all you responded w/ was rambling and crap excuses.

Why did you post at all? What is your purpose here? Did you actually want help w/ the situation?

You want to call this site fake? Or me fake? Or...? Yet you are the one on here posting about your out of control teenager... not me. ;)

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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Dove you sound stupid , how insecure do you sound . I wanted advice from a smart person it the same asshole using different names ,come on now . I didn't ask to argue over no dam internet if I wanted that I would look up stupid fake we'd sites like this bullshit here .

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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You are the same dam person , get off ..bye ..you probably not even real , dove I don't need advice from a non profit organization like you or what ever y'all call y'all self on this fake ass phony shit.

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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Why did you waste our time w/ your ridiculous posting? You asked for help. If you actually want help... quit being such a twit. If you do not want help... go away. If you don't want your children anymore perhaps call CPS and turn them over.

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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I have a 21,16,4,4, very well manners kids my family knows that she lies ,they don't want her around they try to help her don't listen , you can't tell me What I'm doing for parenting , I asked what should I do to help her now not how is my parenting at home .

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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That's your house hold not mines , but when I have older people in my home like I said , that does not go in my home . She should stay in a kids place .

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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I don't need that from a person that's on the internet trying to tell me what I should do . I don't need no help and like I said she's raised in a perfect home I have 4 more other kids and they have much respect . I don't have to house her she also has a father that can do the same thing .

Jodi - posted on 08/25/2016

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I'm sorry, but you don't get to give up on your 14 year old. You brought her into this world, and you can't just throw your hands in the air and kick her out of the house because you don't like what she has become. She is a product of her environment, remember that. I know you don't want to hear it, but the fact is, your parenting created this and now you have to deal with it.

Do NOT hit your child. Hitting a 14 year old is assault. There are so many other things you can do.

Dove asked some very good questions. What WAS her consequence for stealing the phone?

Also, you blame her friends. So stop her from hanging out with her friends if she is going to give her attitude.

Your daughter needs very swift, consistent consequences to her actions. Why would she even HAVE a phone (the one that broke) if she is going to be rude and disrespectful? A phone is a privilege. If she is grounded from going out (because again, she is out of control, so she needs some consequences that will mean something to her) she doesn't need the phone either.

And stop making the excuse that you are a single mother. It is exactly that, an excuse. It has no relevance.

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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You absolutely should have consequences for poor behavior, but hitting or throwing out your teenage daughter are both signs that you need some serious parenting help. Your daughter likely did not turn disrespectful overnight... but perhaps she is disrespectful because she was raised w/ disrespect towards her... which is why I asked what ELSE have you tried other than hitting her or kicking her out (both completely disrespectful to her body and the fact that you are morally and legally obligated to house her).

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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Well... I'm a single parent to two almost 15 year old girls who have zero issues... so go ahead and keep deflecting instead of answering the questions I presented to try and offer any help...

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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If a child has a lack of respect for her family and elderly people she has to learn the hard way . No child should disrespect to her mother who has heart problems . Maybe that's what you do but punishment is going to have to learn .

Tina - posted on 08/25/2016

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First off I'm a very good parent I take care of my kids , I'm.a single parent so I don't end you to tell me what I should do , second she took a phone from where she stay cause her phone broke so she took my uncle phone n he's passed away , it's the kids she hang with and be around for her to act the way she's doing . Her own father does not bother with her due to his wife , so come correct first

Dove - posted on 08/25/2016

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Why is she acting like this? Does she have a mental/emotional health diagnosis or is it simply from lack of appropriate parenting (since you mention hitting a teenager that was my first thought)?

What were her appropriate consequences for stealing? Did you make her do chores to work off the cost of the theft? What have you done about the talking back and disrespect? Hitting her is not an appropriate consequence... neither is kicking out your FOURTEEN year old child....

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