What to do with my daughter who doesn't want to poop?

Gwen - posted on 02/02/2010 ( 9 moms have responded )

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She is not potty trained yet, but I think she's started holding it when she has to poop. She lays on the floor, kicks and throws a fit crying "No poopie! No poopie butt!" Now she is going every other day instead of daily.

She used to have constipation problems, but that hasn't been an issue much lately. I've been making sure she has raisins, juice, etc. to keep things easy for her.

Any other suggestions?

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Maggie - posted on 02/04/2010

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My son has been potty trained for almost 2 years. He was sick a few weeks ago and had diarrhea. After that he started to hold the poop. He was holding it for days at a time, crying about the pain, running around and jumping to try to hold it in. We tried EVERYTHING to convince him to go - telling him the potty likes his poop, telling him it will make him sick, telling him the poop has to go to a factory so it can be turned into dirt so we can plant tomatoes, explaining if your tummy gets full and you don't poop that you won't be able to eat, telling him that his butt has a door that opens up and the poop comes out, telling him that it won't hurt. We tried prunes, prune juice, apples, fiber... Nothing worked! I was so frustrated after two weeks that I called the doctor. Let me preface this by saying I am not the kind of person who runs to medicine every time something goes wrong. In fact I never medicate my kids or myself!

The doctor said use half a dose of Miralax (my son is three). Increase the fiber in the diet. Sit him on the potty for ten minutes after every meal since that's when the stuff really gets moving. Most importantly, though, is to GET EXCITED WHEN HE POOPS. When he sits on the potty just entertain him like he's sitting in a chair. Don't make a big deal about the potty or the lack of poop. If he doesn't poop, fine...if he does then go wild, sing songs, dance, clap, give a treat...whatever you think. If you keep her in diapers that's fine, I'd sit somewhere with her so she can't get up and run it off. Get excited about ANY poop, not just in the potty.

We've been doing this for three days and it WORKS. Today my son sat on his potty all by himself instead of my having to rip his pants off and sit him on it. he talked calmly to me instead of screaming about being scared. He poooooooped!

You can probably skip the Miralax and just increase the fiber in your daughter's diet. Fiber will keep the stools soft so she won't be hurt when she goes. Constipation is actually one of the main causes of "witholding". It causes pain and kids associate pooping with pain and will go to great lengths to avoid pain. It might take a while for her to break that association but just keep up the positive reinforcement!

Some of this info will not apply to your situation but check out this link:

http://www.mindspring.com/~drwarren/enco...

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Jinky - posted on 06/11/2014

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Hi..what if it seems that they had trauma on letting it out cause it hurts? now she is holding her poop because she is afraid to get hurt? she tried drinking duphalac already but it really doesnt help at all...
is Miralax ok for a 2 year old? i need your advise

thanks,

Gwen - posted on 02/09/2010

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It's funny because I've been encouraging her and telling her how good it is to poop, etc. Now when I ask her about going, she says "No poopie good butt." It makes me laugh :-)

[deleted account]

There are two books that I used for my daughter when she was holding her poo in 1st grade. First, Miralax is wonderful. You can place it in liquid and it has no flavor or color. That will get the poo working itself out. Non addictive and you can quit it at any time. Next, my older daughter bought her two books "Everyone Poops" and "Sometimes it Hurts When I Poop". Best of luck

Leota - posted on 02/04/2010

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My daughter has become the "poop cheerleader" because her youngest just hates going because it hurts. She lives with her bio mom full time and visits here and they feed her junk food and we don't. So here she has to go to the bathroom and crys and screams so my daughter says "you can do it. get out poop" and stuff like that and my little granddaughter laughs and relaxes enough to go. Her brother used to hide under the bed. The other thing to try is after it comes out let her say bye poop as she gets to flush it away.

Jennifer - posted on 02/02/2010

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I would call your doctor. There are so many possibilities. It could be anything from constipation, to simply wanting to have control over something. I personally found my child's doctor to be most helpful. I also discovered that talking to my child in a calm non-threatening tone was helpful. I explained what the doctor felt was wrong. That it was medical and help was available. And most importantly that I would do anything in my power to help my child, but I needed their help. If they can talk to me and tell me how they feel, I can better help them to be healthy and happy. I hope this helps.

Margaret - posted on 02/02/2010

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Is it possible that someone has given your daughter the impression, by what they say when they change her, that pooping is disgusting, an inconvenience to that person to change her, and generally unacceptable? Pooping is a necessary process, but it is surprising how children can interpret what they hear and feel that it is wrong to poop. The other possibility is that she has constriction in the rectum which is making pooping painful so that she'd like to avoid it as much as possible. Also be sure she gets plenty of fluid- if she is dehydrated the poop might be hard to pass. Check with her pediatrician...

Cyndi - posted on 02/02/2010

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I would check with her doctor to make sure what she is going through is normal. I remember my son who was about 2-3 would go and poop in privacy, like in a room behind a chair. Some other things that help for pooping are prunes, pears, peaches. Maybe some prune juice. Maybe her going every other day is okay. Just some thoughts.

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