What to say when a friend's child is molested?

Stacey - posted on 04/30/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I ran into a friend that I haven't seen in awhile. We were close years ago when we were both dealing with ex-husband/dead beat dad issues. She remarried years ago and confided her (now soon to be ex) husband had molested her daughters from her previous marriage. My heart wrenched for her and those girls. I had met him on a few occasions and never would anyone think he was the type of person to do something like that. I was working and we couldn't talk much longer than an omg I would have never thought he would do that and omg how awful I'm so sorry that happened. She said we'd have to talk when it wasn't so busy. I personally cannot imagine what it must be like for the children or their mother. As a mom the mere thought of my child having that done to them makes me want to cry. What can you possibly say to someone who is dealing with those emotions that could even begin to help? It just really breaks my heart that this happened to her. She is such a good hearted person, unfortunately that seems to be the type of people these things happen to :(

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I think the best thing you can do for your friend is just to listen to her. She will need a sounding board--someone to listen while she sorts through all of her feelings. There really is no condolence; I've learned that. Just listen, validate her feelings, and hug her a lot.

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 05/01/2013

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I agree with Kelly. Just tell her how sorry you are and be there for her. Listen to her.

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