When to pull a boys foreskin back?? and grandmom touching..??

Tiana - posted on 09/20/2013 ( 20 moms have responded )

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So my sister haves a 20 month old boy whos grand mother (her in law) pulled back the foreskin and i was just wondering if thats good or bad?? i hear u should wait until they are 3 yrs and from there he'll do it on his own i really dont know. but another thing that is on my mind is.. do u think its right for the grandmother to even do something like that..touching him?? please help! im just really concern for my only nephew and dont know what to do.

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Gena - posted on 09/25/2013

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http://m.netdoctor.co.uk/ate/childrenshe...
Just another link answered by a doctor.As Cecilia said there are many links to prove you dont pull the foreskin back.I have found a ton of them and i would like to know who that doctor is that told you to do it. And the link you found that its ok to it would be interesting to read,so please send it!

Gena - posted on 09/25/2013

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My doctor is a highly educated man.I live in a country with good Doctors and knowledge!I am not bragging about where i live but its not that i go to just some kind of a doctor in the bushes.And i do clean my sons private part properbly and he has never had an infection and he is not dirty!

Cecilia - posted on 09/24/2013

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If the baby bad blood in the urine I would assume it's a UTI.

IF the UTI was contracted from lack of cleanliness, which it isn't always, the area that would need to be cleaned to prevent it from happening again would be the urethra opening. You do not need to retract the foreskin to clean this area.

Gena - posted on 09/24/2013

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Cecilia is right you never pull the skin back to clean,thats what i was told by my doctor and the midwives when my son was born.

Cecilia - posted on 09/23/2013

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Sorry but look it up, you do not need to pull the foreskin back to clean (would you like me to get at least 5 links to show you this) You clean what you see. That's all. You don't use soap either.

Yes, maybe some people should consult their doctors on proper care.

Either way, If she thought there was a problem with cleaning she should talk to the parents about it instead of touching a 2 year olds privates. If it isn't your child or you're not the doctor no reason to touch there ever.

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Stephanie - posted on 09/24/2013

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It needs to be cleaned... if you don't clean it the baby can get infections. I was nervouse about it and he peed a little blood and I freaked out brought him in and I had to use cream on his part and ever since I was diligent in cleaning... nothing is scarier as a parent than opening a diaper and finding blood! If the mom has a problem with the grandma doing it than she needs to ask her not to do diaper changes!

Susan - posted on 09/24/2013

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iagree with you too i have four boys and if you dont pull it back (gently of course) and it gets stuck from build up it could really hurt i am not sure why a dr would tell someone not to clean their baby boy's privates correctly i guess this could be controversial so everyone should do what their dr says but like i said i would like to know who thaty dr is i also have several links about cleaning boys foreskin

Susan - posted on 09/23/2013

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i have 4 boys and when they were to small to clean and dry their areas i did it you have to, to avoid infections the grandma might have done it because it wasn't getting done if she kept doing it then maybe there is an issue the mother should consult with her dr to learn how to take care of her boy's privates

Raven - posted on 09/22/2013

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You don't ever need to pull it back. When they are teenagers it will come back naturally. If that happened to my son, I would have raised holy ----. Poor baby. That said, I have a mother in law too LOL

Cecilia - posted on 09/22/2013

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Even if she didn't do it to be malicious, it's good for him to learn good touch bad touch. I would probably wonder myself if it was my nephew too. In this world we never know who to trust.

Tiana - posted on 09/22/2013

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yeah i was thinking the same i havent said anything to anyone lately but i have told her to get him check if she wont i will. and its rare when i see him maybe like every other week or so. my family is weird but when i do see him ill ask him myself. i just want to make sure nothing happens to any little kid. they dont deserve to be touch in any way but i cant say if she did it intenually or not im just hoping that maybe it was any axcident or something.

Cecilia - posted on 09/22/2013

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Even if she chooses to do nothing about the grandmother I do think if it was swollen she should have taken him to the doctor to have him checked. Tell the the truth that the grandmother pulled it back.

As far as should you get involved, I would say for right now stay out of it. Keep an ear out for anything else that arises. I would ask the kid some questions. i know somethings at 20 months the speech can be a little hard to understand, but they understand you and can answer yes or no. See how he feels. If he gives you the feeling that he's hiding something or more is going on then get involved.

Definitely teach him good touch and bad touch. Let him know if anyone does bad touch to let you know. http://b-inspiredmama.com/2012/06/10-tip...

Tiana - posted on 09/22/2013

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thanks for the comments. and yes she haves four sons. so she haves to know what shes doing. after she did that his private part got red and they even say swollen but what gets me upset is that my sister wont do nothing about it. maybe because she doesnt want anything to happen to the lady but if i were her and i keep on telling her is that she should get the boy checked and if theres damage done then to get an invetigation on her mother in law. do ya'll think i should do something about it or should i just leave it between them??

Gena - posted on 09/21/2013

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I also hope she didnt do it with bad intentions.She should be told that its not ok to do it.

Cecilia - posted on 09/21/2013

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When a boy left natural you only clean what you see. Even if it's a little red you just wipe it with a cloth and no soap. You're right though some mothers don't know that. Maybe she had her son cut and that's the reason she doesn't know better. As I said I would hope that she was not malicious in her actions.

Gena - posted on 09/21/2013

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Thanks for correcting me.I will make sure to do my maths next time. So maybe she did it to her son when he was small and thinks its normal.The other question is why she did it.Did she want to clean him or was something hurting him,maybe the skin red etc.

Gena - posted on 09/21/2013

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Maybe she never had boys and was curios without knowing its not good,so maybe she didnt realize what she did wasnt good. Was just a thought i had.

Cecilia - posted on 09/20/2013

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The foreskin should never be forced back. It can attached until about 5 (some until they are teens before it can fully retract) and can cause damage when forced back.

http://www.drgreene.com/qa-articles/norm...

As far as is it right, hell no. I would hope she had no bad intentions or was trying to be nasty. The truth is no matter what she had no place to do that.

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