why does my 1year old proceed with this behavior????

April - posted on 08/03/2012 ( 6 moms have responded )

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i have my daughter being evaluated due to her behavior spitting kicking smacking in the face not only that my daughter dont play well with other children she beats them up even a new born she is very aggresive & i dont know why ima single mom my little girl dont play good with her toys & she is not interested in cartoons. ? i dont know whats going on she has been this way since the day she walked she will pull my hair out and i will ask her to stop or let go & then she says shut up & keeps doing it . its very stressful i tried timeout in a play pen i tried rewarding her nothing is working and if i let her out of time out she does the same thing again to get in trouble ?? o just want some advice & answers this is hard to deal with everyday. & my daughter will bang her head on the floor & walk round pulling her own hair & punching her self

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/03/2012

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There are many, many different boards here, too...Try searching for one on behavioural disorders, and see if you can also find some moms who have experience in that arena.

I know that you feel entirely frustrated, tired, and at times embarrassed. Honey, we've all been there at least once. Its ok to admit that you're overwhelmed, and ask for help.

We may not be physically close, but we can offer a lot of support here.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/03/2012

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well, thats why I said a behavioural evaluation is a good idea. I'm not up on Autism behaviours, but this does sound like more of a disorder than simple misbehaving.

April - posted on 08/03/2012

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thanks but i have done what you said i confirmed all this with her doctor & they just say try timeout i tell them it doesnt work . but hopefully the evaluation picks up & helps i think my daughter may have a disorder do to punching her self & others i mean she is really aggresive to her & others i go in public with my little one punching me 7 pulling my hair its imbarrasing behavior. & i have people look at me and shake their head. i just feel like crying its a mess.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/03/2012

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Well, I know it's stressful. And, it could be seated in her father's behaviour, if he's been around a lot, and she's witnessed/been through it with him, or seen him treat you in that manner. Does that happen?

I'm glad that you have your mom to help.

Kids do mirror actions that they see. And if they see it on a consistent basis, they will mimic and imitate the behaviours to anyone.

If the doctors aren't sharing information with you, you need to ask questions of them. Make a list of the questions that you have (so that you have a "script" of sorts to work with) Then, make an appointment to see them, and be armed with your list of questions. If there is something that they have not found yet, they should be up front, and if they have any results, they should also share that with you, along with treatment strategies. If they are not, or if the directions are incomplete or not fully understood, don't be afraid to ask until you are certain that you have gotten a comprehensive answer.

You are her advocate, and since she can't really vocalize yet (at least not so that she can say "this is how I feel") you need to be her voice. Her behaviour is concerning, especially if she's telling you to shut up, and not following the time out procedures.

Hang in there, honey. You can, and will get through this, and your daughter will be better (hopefully) if a treatment can be figured out

April - posted on 08/03/2012

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my mom is helping but its very stressful i mean she wakes up 7 goes to sleep doing the behavior and the program seems to be involved but they arent providing me or her with the right steps . i mean i feel like giving up . i dont know if it could be from her father doing drugs putting his hands on her & mistreating her.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 08/03/2012

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April, if you have her being evaluated for behavioural issues, then that is the best step you can take at this point.

Do you have someone that can help you with her until you get the evaluations finished? If they find anything, then they'll be able to start treatment at that time, but until then...?

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