working family

Geanine - posted on 01/08/2014 ( 19 moms have responded )

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I feel if both mom and dad work both partys need to do there job with there child not just one if dad works two jobs from 3am to 6am one job then 6:30am to 2:30 pm second job and the child gets out of school at 3pm and mom has to go to work for 10am to 11pm i feel dad should do his job and pick up his son from school i mean hes 5 yrs old how hard can that be reply if u think im wrong

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Geanine - posted on 01/10/2014

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Sounds good i mean HRA makes you work for them anyways if you don't have a job yes they do help with foodstamps rent etc.but i don't want to go into a homeless selter with my son i live with his father he pays all the bills i rather deal with his fathers B.S then go into a homeless selter that is dirty with mice and bedbugs its not like my sons father is abusve or hits me and my son he just wont pick his son up from school which is ok I'm his mother i will work around my sons school hours pick him up thats it life goes on i wanted my son who cares if his father didn't i will support my son and his father will support a roof over our heads

LalaBoom - posted on 01/10/2014

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Its wrong for both parents to have two jobs to begin with.

Does either parent think of the kids AT ALL? Who, or when, is anyone spending quality time with them?

THAT is whats wrong.

Is there ANYONE at all, I mean ANYONE who can help you even a bit? Maybe you can enter a shelter so they can give you an apartment, HRA has vouchers for food stamps, childcare, rent, even one-time deals to furnish an apartment and get the downpayment.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/09/2014

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well, first of all, licensed daycares DO have people who can handle allergy issues and administer treatments.

Go to court, get support set. Get yourself some assistance, look for a better job, and move your situation forward. You live in a state where there is a plethora of assistance options, and you need to look into them. If you don't want to rock the boat, then keep doing as you are, even though its not really working out for you...I don't recommend that course, as it teaches your child to be complacent, and doesn't give them a good example of taking hold of the reins and steering their own life.

Geanine - posted on 01/09/2014

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I mean he should give me more i just don't want this to be any issue what can i do if he dont want to support his son i have family but i cant stay with them even if its not for a long period of time i will just deal with this man until my son is old enough to stay home alone theres not much i can do so all means make the best out of a bad situation.

Jodi - posted on 01/09/2014

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So you agreed to receiving only $60 a month in child support? Seriously? There is no way child support should only be that amount. Do you have family you can stay with while you get things sorted out.

Geanine - posted on 01/09/2014

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Child support is between him and I it is not court order you ask if there is a daycare yes there is right in my building a daycare But the lady at the daycare is not liecened to give any meds my son has to carry a Epi-pen Jr with him all the time he cant be around peanut butter peanuts etc. He also has asthma he needs to take the nebulizer when he is short of breath no daycare or person i know of don't know how to work with a child with these issue thats y i wanted his father to look after him because of his issues

Jodi - posted on 01/09/2014

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What about the child support, though? Is that court ordered? Or just something you agreed between you? Do you have a daycare nearby and can you get assistance?

Geanine - posted on 01/09/2014

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No i cant live somewhere else i was working 10am-11pm i left the job because dad wouldn't help out with his son he wanted me to bring our son to and from school so i went back to home care where i only work mon-fri 4-5 hrs and everyother weekend 4-5hrs around my sons school hrs i would like to work more than that like 8hrs but i cant afford a siiter i only make $8.00 an hr the sitter wants $15-20 an hr im sry i didnt make myself clear i have so much in my head i want to write everything at one time sry for that

Jodi - posted on 01/09/2014

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Does he pay all the bills?

No back to your original post. You made it sound like you are actually "with" this man. So I assumed you were together. Obviously you aren't. But you are living in the same home?

You are working 10am to 11pm and only earning $200 a week??? I'm confused.

Sorry, there are lots of things here that aren't really adding up.

It won't matter if he goes to court and says he pays all the bills. If he has made it clear he doesn't want the child, he probably won't get custody. $60 a month child support......how does that work out? Is that court ordered? On what basis?

Can you move to somewhere else?

Geanine - posted on 01/09/2014

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Jodi thanks for the reply yes i have to stay with him i only work partime $200.00 a week i live in Brooklyn N.Y.the rent in Brooklyn is crazy i cant do it on my own and his child support is only $60.00per month he gives me that much volenteely without court order if i take him to court he is going to say he pays all the bills all the rent which is $1300.00 per month so what should i do in a mess like this

Jodi - posted on 01/09/2014

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I'm sorry, did I get this straight? You are actually still with this guy and he's telling you this shit?

Geanine - posted on 01/09/2014

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Anyway i spoke to my sons father about me working i told him i will work 4-5hrs everyother weekend 4-5hrs total hrs per week 28hrs anyway as this being said dad told me that he never wanted any kids ever so i took that as you f bastard thanks for the heads up this is yyy dad cant pick up his son from school but what i dont get is every year he wants to claim the child on his taxs i ask y would u want to do that when u just told me you never wanted your son

Geanine - posted on 01/09/2014

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Jodi thanks for the reply i work in secuirty and my hours r sometimes overwelming but i also work in home care i will take what you said and use it in the best way i can i will work around my sons school hours i will being him to school and pick him up from school i will work only 28hrs a week plus everyother weekend so around 4-5hours a day for seven days what do u think please reply thank you

Geanine - posted on 01/09/2014

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Thank you for the reply your right my work hours do need to change i will bring my son to school and pick him up and get a sitter for the weekend for 5hrs and just work around my sons school hours thank you for replying.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/08/2014

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And, not that I want to add another can of worms, but if his mother needs care as well, that does need to be taken into full account.

Perhaps it's time for the two of you to re-evaluate the situation, see if some work schedules can be re-arranged so that both of you can parent, work, and he can still help care for his mother.

Jodi - posted on 01/08/2014

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Dad has issues with you working? Or dad has issues with the hours you work? After all, when do you and dad actually get time together if he works from 3am, and then you work until 11pm? I'd have issues with it too if I were dad.

I'm not saying dad shouldn't help out around the house - if you both work, you both have to pitch in where necessary. But he may have a point about your job.

Geanine - posted on 01/08/2014

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Thank you for the reply Dad thinks i should do it dad doesn't want just anyone to pick up his son even though he knows them or not i give backround checks to anyone watching my son just to be on the safe side dad has issues with me working if he don't like the kind or job i have i cant do it anyway your right he should come home after work and rest but he doesn t he takes his mother where ever she needs to go at any given time so i feel if thats the case he should pick his son up from school and take his son with him .

Chet - posted on 01/08/2014

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It sounds reasonable, but it may not be the only reasonable option. I definitely know people who could pick their kids up from school, but they have somebody else do it because they need to get ready for work, or have a nap when they get home from a late shift, or they can't reliably get to the school on time because of traffic or frequently running late a work.
Is it possible the dad is really tired after working from 3am to 2:30pm and somebody else is available to pick up the child from school?
In any case, it sounds like you think the dad should pick up your son. What does the dad think?

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