Working mom turning into SAHM, feeling like I'm in over my head.

Rose - posted on 03/04/2014 ( no moms have responded yet )

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Hi, I need some help/advice. I am a mother of an almost 4 year old and I am soon to be expecting my second (a boy), with my DD I stayed home for a year, and she has since been in a formal pre-school setting at the place where I work. When I have my new baby and go on Mat leave, I will lose her spot in pre-school. I have a lot of concerns as my daughter is very used to the structure and playmates that come with pre-school. When she is home for a whole day with just me, she gets bored and wants constant attention/playtime, she no longer naps, so from 6:30am until 8:30 pm I am basically her slave. I don't know what to do with her for 17 hours a day! I start feeling frustrated after a couple hours of zero time to myself. We do art, we play with toys, we go for walks, park (weather permitting), we read books, we watch a few cartoons, but I just feel like there are too many hours in the day to fill.

I have no idea how I am going to handle her on my own with a new baby, the baby will need to be fed, and given attention, and I know she will just whine the whole time I pay attention to the baby. From what I remember baby's are up a lot at night, and a nap during the day is a godsend, with her home I won't be getting any sleep during the day. DH will be gone during the weekdays, I don't have any family/friends in town who could help. I feel so overwhelmed at the prospect of being solely responsible for the two of them that I've been crying a lot. I really don't know how I'm going to handle this I'm scared. I wanted to be home with the baby and keep DD in pre-school, it seemed the best for everyone, I only found out a week ago that I couldn't keep her in the school while on Mat leave. I feel bitter, I had really wanted to be able to go to baby playgroups, and baby and mommy workouts during the weekdays to relieve isolation, now I will just be stuck at home by myself with a newborn, and a child that's used to having playmates. All the playgroups in my area are by age, and my kids don't fit into the same age category so I can't go to any of them. I feel horrible for being so down about being home with both my kids, I just don't know how to handle it.

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