Young parenting lockdown

Alisha - posted on 09/19/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )

3

0

0

My beautiful little boy was born 7 weeks ago, and to me and my family he is the most precious thing in the world. I am a young mother, 15 years old and still live with my parents and older brothers and sisters which have no children so my little baby is the first grandchild. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and recently moved overseas with my family as I had no choice, and once settled in found out I was pregnant with my boyfriends baby.. (at the time we were long distance). My father is very traditional and old school and so of course at first did not talk to me for a while but I had great support from my mother and sisters. As it got closer to my due date, my father grew so close to me and would tell us all how excited he is for his first granbaby. I knew my father probably wouldn't accept my boyfriend, and so I did not mention anything with him. My boyfriend flew over unexpectadly, to be with me and our son, and be apart of this little boy's life. But my father would not accept him. He seriously went psycho, saying that he will never ever allow him to see me or my baby. I was just so upset and at the time carrying. But my father would not budge. My father was not at the birth of my son, but my sisters and mom were, I asked them if my boyfriend could please attend and they agreed, but this was not to be known by my father. A couple of times behind my dads back me and me baby would secretly meet up with his father. Me and my boyfriend are still so in love and though my father will not accept him we still have faith. Its been so long now, and my baby is getting older and bigger and growing stronger by the day, and I am just really tired of waiting around for practically no change. My boyfriend is also growing impatient as he misses his son, and me. He flew back to New Zealand 2 weeks ago so I could sort something out, but nothing has changed. I have an idea that im not sure if I should act upon. I would like to move over to New Zealand where I am originally from, and where my boyfriend is. His family have said that we could live with them if we do come. But I know my family would be hurt. I just think it is more important for my son to know he is loved by both parents, and I want to know I have created my own family, not being ruled by my own parents and older siblings in front of my child. But as of my age, Im not sure if my parents are the ones who decide if I can go or not.. Help please :(

2 Comments

View replies by

Dove - posted on 09/19/2012

11,620

0

1348

I don't know where you are, but I'm pretty sure fathers have a right to their children in every country. Your dad may (or may not) control YOUR life at the moment, but he can't control the fact that your child's father has a legal right to be involved in HIS life.



My best advice is to call a lawyer and find out what your options are right now... and what the baby's father's options are as well. If you get a hold of a lawyer that doesn't take you seriously because of your age... call another one.



You are right that your child should know he is loved and cared for by both parents. Because of your young ages you definitely need parental help and support (either your parents or his... or both) at this time, but you both CAN make this work if you are committed to each other, your son, your education, and soon enough... jobs. Good luck!

Michelle - posted on 09/19/2012

2,191

23

1087

You would have to check with a lawyer but here in Canada you can legally live on your own and make your own decisions at the age of 16 if you are able to prove that you can support yourself financially and look after yourself.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms