13 months old, wont stop crying.

Carol - posted on 09/08/2009 ( 9 moms have responded )

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my friend is currently babysitting a 13 month old girl. she's got 2 kids herself (2 and 4) this girl HAS to be held all the time or she'll scream, not even crying, screaming. she's been watching her for about 2 months now and there's still no change in her attitude, we're aware it COULD be separation anxiety, but its been going on for a while now. Once she's held everything is okay, but my friend cant be holding her ALL the time as she's got two other children of her own. shes tried everything (including talking to her parents about it) and nothing seems to be working. she doesnt want to cause any emotional issues, but she just doesnt know what to do anymore. how should she deal with this without neglecting her two children?

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Kate - posted on 09/08/2009

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A trip to the docs I think is definitely called for. My bubba would hate it if I carried or held her for an extended period. Having said that, she has gone to daycare from 3 months old. I still think it's odd tho. Might be teething ? Mine's only got 1 tooth, but when she's teething, she goes off all her food and can cry a bit, dummy half hanging out. She is also clingy. Doesn't go on for that long tho, like only a couple of days. Every baby is different, but it would be nice to know the cause. Isn't there places like here there is Tressillian? You move in for a week and they help you find out what's wrong with bubs, 13 months is a long time to not know or to have not dealt with constant crying. I find that worrying that they don't know what the cause is.... :(

Scarlett - posted on 09/08/2009

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She could try wearing the baby in a baby wrap. That way her hands are free, but the child still is feeling held. I have one that is just spoiled and I've been trying to let her comfort herself some and I have found that a mirror really helps. I put her playpen right next to a large mirror.

Carol - posted on 09/08/2009

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yeah, my sons the same way. he can hurt himself and the crying wont last more than a few minutes. I've asked my friend if she thinks she should discuss taking the little girl to the doctor with her parents. it doesnt seem right that shes constantly screaming. I personally think the parents just spoiled her WAY too much.

another new fact, the last babysitter this girl had wouldnt do it anymore because she couldnt take her out, get her to nap, eat, play, anything like that. so this isnt a first time experiance for her or the parents

Kate - posted on 09/08/2009

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Ooooh, I wonder if anything is wrong? My bubba could have slammed her finger in a door and a dummy will always work for her. Or for anything else. How strange that baby won't stop crying!

Carol - posted on 09/08/2009

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she has a special blankie, but during these periods of screaming she wont even take it.

Carol - posted on 09/08/2009

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thank you both for the advice, she's tried leaving her for certain periods of time, but this is also quite hard, since the only quiet room in the house is her boys room, and the youngest still takes naps. so once he's gotta nap, shes gotta leave that room. she's pretty much running out of options of what to do with this little girl.
also, I just was informed, the parents have the same problem at home with her, so it does look like its more of a spoiled thing than seperation.

Aimee - posted on 09/08/2009

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I agree with letting the child cry for periods of time to see if she can calm herself down? Does she have a special blankie? Animal? Anything that can help comfort her?

Kelly - posted on 09/08/2009

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maybe shes a cloic baby,my youngest girl was like that,the only thing that stopped her was the swing or when she finally fell asleep,which wasnet for long,by the sound of it the child is spoiled,let her cry it wont hurt her,its not crule,belive me after awhile,she will notice thar she(the chlid) is quiet fine and slow down a bit,you have to remember that kids like to push limits,and you have to show them where it is,stand firm your friend will do ok

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not nice to say but, your friend will have to leave her to cry for a while, then only pick her up when she stops, yes i know she's young but she will learn that when she's calm and relaxed that she gets this attention. Tell her to stick by her guns, cause in the end, the little one will benefit as will everyone around her. If she's looking after this 13 month at her home not the childs, ask her parents to bring something familiar from the little ones home to help her comfort herself.

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