14 years old and i want to be a Teen mom

Kayla - posted on 06/28/2012 ( 259 moms have responded )

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Im 14 years old & i want to be a teen mom . Iv wanted a baby since i was 13. I am still a virgin!!. Im in a relationship with my boyfriend isaiah who told me he wants to have sex. Ibrought up the "What if i get pregnet" Talk with him & he says " He doesnt care,Hes goign to stick with me through it." I also told him that im scared & what if im to little for the baby? Then i started talking about how our parents would react if i ever do get pregnet. He said He didnt care what our parents think he loves me & hes going to be there for me. then we thought out everything & now i think were ready im ready to be a teen mom...i still havent told my parents i wana be a teen mom. any advice?

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Krista - posted on 06/28/2012

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My advice is to wait. Seriously. It's easy for both you and your boyfriend to think you have it all figured out, but there's a lot that you're not thinking about.

Where will you live?
Who will pay for the baby's necessities? Babies are rather expensive.

Basically, Isaiah will have to quit school and get a full-time job. And if he's 14 as well, he may not even be legally allowed to work. But let's say that he can. Well, do you really think that a high-school dropout is going to get a job paying anything more than minimum wage? How are you guys going to pay rent, groceries, diapers, utilities, etc. off of ONE minimum-wage salary? (I DO hope that you're not assuming that your parents will let the two of you live with them -- if you're ready to have a baby, you're ready to live on your own, sweetie.)

So Isaiah's going to be working a min-wage job and you'll be home full-time with a baby. And when your friends are going to dances and parties, you won't be able to go. If they're going to the beach, or even just to hang out, you won't be able to go. You'll fight about money, because you'll be so cash-strapped it won't even be funny.

Look, I know you're looking for support, but I'd be doing you a major disservice if I gave you any advice other than to wait. If you choose to become a mother at such a young age, you will hear a very loud noise: the noise of an infinite number of choices slamming shut forever. You are SO young, and you have so many potential years of childbearing ahead of you. Why rush? At least wait until you and Isaiah have graduated from high school -- you'll have better job prospects and will be much better able to support a baby.

Plus, I hate to be cynical, but I've heard the "I'll stand by you if you get pregnant" line from more than one teenage boy when I was a teenage girl. Those boys were so desperately horny they probably would have promised to make me Prime Minister if it meant getting laid. I'm not automatically saying that Isaiah's NOT sincere...but I really don't think he's fully thinking about this. And to be frank, neither are you.

Wait. And in the meantime, go talk to your mom and ask her about birth control, just so that you can prevent an unintended pregnancy, in case you DO slip up. You have so much potential and so much time --- why tie yourself down like this right now?

Jodi - posted on 06/28/2012

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I would suggest that anyone who spells it "pregnet" probably should stay at school for a little longer if they want to be able to be the type of parent who can give their own child educated opportunities......

Just in case this is a serious post.......
Where the FUCK are you going to find $8,000 when your kid needs braces? How are you going to find the $300 a week it will cost to feed him when he is a 15 year old teenage boy, and that's only the beginning. Let's not forget the costs of college, the cost of their sports. Oh, I could go ON and ON and ON.

Oh, that's right, no college education. You WON'T be able to afford it.

And that's if you are still together. Statistically, however, your relationship will more likely be a failure than a lasting one (sorry to be a downer on that), so in that case, all of the above is irrelevant. You will end up stuck supporting the baby because the bf won't be able to get a job and pay child support, most likely end up in jail, your child will be brought up in poverty..... wow, great opportunities there.

Anyway, getting on to my advice? I would suggest you let your parents know of your intentions sooner rather than later. It is probably going to help your case. Springing it on them at the last minute is not really a good idea, you really need to give them time to get used to the idea. If you leave it until too late, you will never get them on board, but if you ease them into it, they MIGHT be okay with it..... :\

Alyssa - posted on 06/28/2012

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Learn how to spell pregnant before you become it.

Be a kid. You only have one chance. You have the rest of your life to be grown up.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/28/2012

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When I was 14, I had a boyfriend much like this. He was trying to pressure me into sex, and I was NOT ready. He told me you cannot get pregnant the first time, said he would lay down a towel, he loved me, wanted to be with me...bla bla bla. When I told him I was not ready, we broke up. He immediately started dating some 11 year old girl, and got HER pregnant. I was SOOOOO thankful I did not sleep with him.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/28/2012

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He is just telling you what you want to hear to have sex. Don't do it and find another boyfriend that won't use you. You are both only 14, get your lives in order first. The first sign of pregnancy, this guy will 100% ditch you and turn around and call you a slut to all his friends. Walk away. Let him get another girl pregnant. Think before you do this, and talk with your mom. She will help you.

Being a mom is really hard. I mean REALLY hard. Finish school first. I know he will not stick around. And his parents and yours will flip out if you end up pregnant. I don't know why you would do this to yourself. YOUR future will be in jeopardy. Not his. He will just walk away, and you will be stuck with a crying screaming, shitting, pissing, puking, never sleeping baby.

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Jodi - posted on 07/06/2012

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OK, this was locked 5 days ago and has been unlocked. Again.
To the OP, if you are the one unlocking this post, then don't, or it will be deleted.

Jodi
WtCoM Moderator

Thereasa - posted on 07/06/2012

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Yes and no kristina. Who says at 14,15,16,17 I dnt encourage it but who says u aren't responsible enough to look after one with the right support you can do it I am living prof boy I
Love my child I have two my youngest is 7 both to same dad was with him nearly 10 years.
But I do say try to forget about wanting one at that age. Mine was a mistake I remember thinking nah it will Neva happen to. I dnt regret it one bit I think my life is awesome I've grown up with them :) babe just what till ur of age and go about it the right way with mr right xxx

Shawnn - posted on 07/06/2012

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Kayla,

Congratulations! You're well on your way to being a responsible adult! And I, for one, am proud of you!

Ok, hon, now just remember: The words "I LOVE YOU" right now probably translate to "I want to get in your pants, so I'll tell you I love you because you'll fall for it" Don't fall for it!

Now, remember this: YOU are worth so much more as a person, rather than a sex toy. You can be proud of yourself for making the adult decision, and sticking with it. Once you graduate HS, and have at least a general studies diploma, you'll have better earning potential, and better potential to advance further, which will help with supporting a baby in the long run.

Hang onto your youth, honey! You will have so much more fun, and enjoyment, without having that extra baggage for awhile.

Again, WOOHOO!!! GOOD JOB!!! I'M PROUD OF YOU!!!

Thereasa - posted on 07/06/2012

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I see he has broken up with you he must not have been true. I was 3 weeks off 15 when I had my oldest it was a huge shock when I found out I was to far along to have abortion. I was so blessed all my baby did was eat sleep etc I dnt regret it at all however I would love to turn bak time and have my teen years etc... at least I kept up with school as best as I could and I had a florist job and still in the industry. my advice to you is, it's not always great as it sounds. enjoy ur years do it the right way and marry let it be with someone u truly deeply love. god bless you xxx

Bernadette - posted on 07/01/2012

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I just read your previous post. Sorry, I responded before reading all the other posts. So the guy broke up with you when you refused to sleep with him? In that case, it's a good thing you did refuse because obviously he was only telling you what you wanted to hear in order to get what he wanted from you. Guys that age do that kind of thing. Hold off until you are older, and much wiser, and able to tell the genuine guys from the ones who will tell you anything in order to get their own way. Not having sex is actually a great way to tell the guys who love you, from the ones who don't. If they love you for you, they'll wait as long as it takes. If they're only after sex, they'll leave after you've said no. Sure, they may say that's ok and that they're willing to wait. But guarantee they'll ask again after a short wait. And I think a lot of girls fall for that - "oh, well he said he was ok with it when I said no, and he's stuck around so he must love me" so they give in when he asks again.

Krista - posted on 07/01/2012

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Well, considering that the OP has decided not to be pressured into sex (and her BF broke up with her because of it), I'd say that she made the right decision!!! Thank you so much for your contributions, ladies.

Krista
WTCOM Moderator

Bernadette - posted on 07/01/2012

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Please don't do it! I have knows since I was about the same age that I wanted a baby too, and used to always think about what it would be like, and fantasize about having one that young. However, I was mature enough to realise that it was a REALLY bad idea and that I was in no way ready to have one yet. I had my first at 29 years old, with my husband. WANTING a baby, and BEING READY for a baby are two very different things. You haven't finished your education yet. You have no work experience, no savings, and relationships at that age very rarely last into adulthood. Do what you need to do first - get some qualifications and work experience, save some money towards being able to live independently, and WAIT until you are with the person you are sure you want to stay with, and who will be able (not just willing) to be there to support you and your kids. And because you want it so badly, I'm sure that by the time you're READY, you'll be a great loving mum.

Kathryn - posted on 07/01/2012

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really, i hope this is a joke. a baby at 14??? your life will change forever and not fot the better. how are you going to finish hight school get a job, go to collage?. whos buying all the supplies you need for a baby? where is all your money coming from? where are you going to live. you will never get to go anywhere with youtr friend again. and you wont get anyt sleep for the next 5 years. USE A CONDO OR,GO ON THE PILL

Charmine - posted on 07/01/2012

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The best advice, just like everyone has said is to wait. You are so young, and there are sooo many things you should experience before you have a child to care for. First of all you need to finish school and think about college. Most places that hire now are starting to require at least an Associate's Degree, unless you are happy working at McDonald's and asking everyone "do you want fries with that". Any boy at that age is going to tell you he will stick by you no matter what just so he can get laid. If you are serious about losing your virginity (and again as a mother I am going to tell you to wait), please use protection and think about birth control. I think its great you want to be a mom, but at this age try babysitting for people in your community that have younger children. You will be able to play house and not have to worry about supporting the kid. Please really stop to think about what kind of life you can honestly give a child when you are still a child yourself. I wish you luck in whatever choice you make, but I will tell you I waited until I was in my 20's to get pregnant, and I was able to do so much I would have missed out on if I had a kid to take care of.

Jessica - posted on 07/01/2012

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As a mom and a teacher of students your age, WAIT. Both to have sex as well as to become a mom. You may think you are ready, and while you might be physically, you are not ready emotionally, financially or mentally. Believe me, every teen mom I have taught or worked with, including a former athlete of mine, says that while they love their child, they were not and still are not ready to be parents.

On a side note, do you really believe your boyfriend? If he is the same age as you, or even still a teenager for that matter, more than likely, he really doesn't want to become a parent. I've seen too many times where the boyfriend says the same things to his girlfriend, and then when she gets pregnant, at first he says he will stick by her, but the closer it comes to the birth, the more real it becomes, and the more likely they will be to bolt.

During middle school, and heck even high school, relationships are so flighty... one minute you are "so in love" and the next you never want to see each other again, only to get back together by the end of lunch!

Bottom line, wait until you are older, more mature and truly ready to handle the responsibility, socially, emotionally, financially, mentally, and physically, of being a parent.

Mindy - posted on 07/01/2012

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I am glad to hear that you have made the decision to wait. I was twenty-six when I had my daughter (who is now 3) and it really does make major changes to your life and can put a lot of stress on a relationship. You no longer get to come and go as you please, as you will experience when you are 18. Your life will be devoted to your child and you will have little time to think about yourself.

I wanted a baby when I was your age and I was a virgin until I was 18. Even at 18, most boys are not mature. They will say anything to have sex with you and do not care about the consequences or your feelings, because most of them will just walk away and not look back.

You may not know it now, but when you get older there are so many things you will want to do that you cannot see now. Such as maybe going to college (which is completely different from school now). You will make friends that you will want to go out and have a good time with. If you have a child, you will have to pay for a sitter and struggle to make ends meet to even have the time or money to go have fun.

You may want to travel when you get older and go on vacations and see the world, which is hard to do when you have a child in school and have to work many hours to make ends meet.

Sex is not something you should take lightly. HPV, which can cause cervical cancer (trust me, I know) is everywhere. You can get chlamydia or gonorrhea, which can make you not able to have children. Herpes gives you sores that, so far, you can never get rid of. HIV or AIDs, you can never get rid of and can kill you....

Talk to a parent first. They have a lot of experience in life. If you chose to have sex you should always use a condom because that is the only (not 100 percent effective) way to avoid diseases besides avoiding sex.

I am twenty-nine and struggle to make ends meet. Trust me when I say, it's not fun and you don't have a bunch of time to spend with your child. My daughter's father is in the picture and it's still VERY hard. Especially since there are not many jobs out there anymore.

Louise - posted on 07/01/2012

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you are not ready to be parents at 14 believe me.Your not even older enough to work to support your baby.Or were you just going to claim benefits.Im not being mean when i ask that but you must think about things first.He like most boys just want sex and bringing up a baby the right way is no walk in the park.
I was 17 when my 1st was born and i was ready ,my hubby and i got married when i was 18 and we are still together with 6 more children now.Lucky enough i was never into clubbing,going out or anything so i was 100% dedicated to my son at the time and still am to all my kids now.
Children are hard work and are for life not just for the baby period.
So yes sometimes it works out but my mother who i dont have any thing to do with
had me at 15 and my brother at 17 then when i was 5 and my brother 3 she tried to put us in care,but my dad and step mum took us in.She then had 3 more kids by different dads and dumped them then had them back.The poor kids were brought up in council estates and were common as muck.My half sister had a baby at 16 and god knows what happened.
Thank fully my kids are in the middle of no where and live in a big house and have lots of love and we love them to bits.May be cause i refuse to let them down like my mum did me.But my point is at 14 you could not tolerate screaming ,crying,tantrums,teething ,sleepless nights,the cheek as they get older.Please dont do it,wait and meet the right man when your older or you could bring a poor baby into the world and cause them alot of heartache and upset.

Dixie - posted on 07/01/2012

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My friend is 15, her b/f wanted a baby. She is 8 months along and he dumped her three months ago.
I guess he only wanted the sex.

Ashley - posted on 07/01/2012

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I would also talk with your parents. Babies are exciting times and I agree you should have their blessing first. This makes it joyful over stressful. Also have you thought about all the expenses your baby will create? I have a 2 year old. When my baby was born diapers/wipes cost me around $100 a month. Plus breast feeding doesn't always happen and formula will be needed (add another $50 a month at least). Then when the baby needs baby food whether or not you make your own, that adds up as well. Plus clothing and other wants. When I had my baby I wanted to ensure she had everything she wanted --- she is a bit spoiled --- it adds up. Also what about childcare expenses. You don't want to drop out of school. Your baby will need that education you will receive to do well in life her or himself. I remember the days when I wanted to be a teen mom (I never did)... and how I am in my 20s with a great toddler and glad I waited as I can give her so much more then I could have ever as a teen. (Lost my virginity at 14 and wish I would have waited until at least 16 if not 18)... lots of responsibility that I didn't understand.

Also - please do not get the "not us" thought processes. Babies change everything. Most teenage relationships do not last, some do. The changes are not in your favor. The emotional roller coaster when you do break up is not fun after sex, especially your first. Also, your boyfriends intentions may be to stay and be there for you, but again, look at some stats, probably won't be there how you expect, but he may, its a gamble. I have been with my other half for almost 5 years, the baby changed a lot, and while he is there for his daughter, he is not for me. We are hanging on by a thread. Its work (relationships) and the baby will only make it more work.

Donna - posted on 07/01/2012

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Kayla, tell your parents and his parents first. If you get their blessings then you will know that it is a good thing. When I was ready at 26 years old, with a full time job, in our own home, with two cars, and a few fun traveling experiences under our belt,- I told the world I wanted a baby and it felt so good when I became pregnant to share this with my friends and family. It was such an exciting time. Maybe you could tell your parents that you are thinking about having sex and that you and your boyfriend want to learn all about sex and birthday control. Again look for their blessings and approval then you will know its a good time to start. Kayla talk to your mom, make her your best friend, she knows a lot. Give her a couple of chances too,- to be your best friend,- she's new at this. Maybe she could help you get a job in a daycare near you so you can get some practice with babies. Good Luck Kayla.

Kari - posted on 07/01/2012

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Pregnancy is the biggest killer of teenage girls worldwide. Follow link and read article. It is not a joke and can have major life threatening effects on you. http://t.co/Vneq1DRK

Theresa - posted on 06/30/2012

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Great news Kayla, so glad to hear that you DO have a brain and have thought about and really listened to what people have said on here to help. I told my husband your situation and he even said that boys will say anything you want to hear to get what they want! That's from a guy! There's nothing wrong with waiting for your Mr Right, he will turn up and you can have babies the right way. Good luck to you and congratulations on making a responsible decision!

Tina - posted on 06/30/2012

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That's such a relief it's good you have a brain and have taken peoples advice. Good girl. Some girls wouldn't listen no matter what you tell them. Waiting will be the best decision you've made. Good on ya.

Joy - posted on 06/30/2012

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Good to hear, Kayla. Children are expensive & hard work. When you are able to support yourself (and it sounds like you're on the right track -it'll just take a few years,) then is a good time to start planning a family. We moms all love our kids, but also pull our hair out often -its why many of us go grey. Good luck to you!

Christine - posted on 06/30/2012

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GREAT news Kayla! You have made a resonsible decision and the point that you have been reading these caring posts means you are on the right road.See, he was just wanting SEX!! arue "boyfriend"would wait for you, even years if he truly was in love. Good Riddace to Isaiah! Being a virgin is nothing at all to be embarrassed of. I know the true love of my life really did wish I was a virgin (he was) if I could of just waited a few months:( Its a real gift to the one you really love.so, value your virginity like you would a prized possession.And value your body too!!~

Annette - posted on 06/30/2012

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if he wants a baby with you, then when you grow up, get married and do it the right way... you are only 14, so you do not have the experience to raise a baby... you are just one yourself... at 14, you really shouldn't be getting into sexual relationships anyway... you are only young once... don't waste your life on wanting something you don't need right now. enjoy being young. you have the rest of your life for things like that... remember, boys talk a good talk, but many times they don't walk the walk. there are also things like std's to worry about... and how are you going to afford the baby, etc...

Sharlene - posted on 06/30/2012

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Im so glad to hear that, enjoy being a teenage kid for christsake and have loads of fun , the baby can come later when you find your true first love .

Patty - posted on 06/30/2012

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Oh sweetie you are still a child yourself. Raising a child is very hard. 3am feedings, walking the floors when they have colic, or are sick. And those are just some of the things. Your life is no longer yours. The baby will always need constant care. And your boyfriend may say he will always be there, but you can't count on that. My advice to you is enjoy being a teenager, don't grow up so fast, first finish school, go to college, and get a career so that you can support yourself. Then start a family.

Kayla - posted on 06/30/2012

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I read everything under hear .... New is isaiah brok up with me 2 days ago because he asked me again & then i came back & read everthing & started to think about this .... I cant do it & so i said No .... Hes broke up with .. I plan not to have a baby until i get older. Thankkks !(:

Kimmi - posted on 06/30/2012

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If you are unable to spell the word "pregnant", then you are definitely unable to take care of a newborn, and Isaiah is telling you what ALL boys tell girls in order to get in their pants! Boys since the beginning of time have said that to girls in order to get what they want. When you do wind up pregnant, it will be you and your parents who will be rearing the baby, NOT Isaiah. PLEASE listen to the other mothers here..as well as me..i am now a grandmother of three beautiful grandkids, so believe me when i say i KNOW what you're up against, because i've been through it, too. (Thank GOD i didn't get pregnant when i was told, "But i will stick by you", and "You would have sex with me if you loved me".) Your parents' hearts will be broken if you get pregnant at 14 years old, and your relationship with them, even if they're great through this, will be forever altered. Please reconsider. If this boy truly loves you, then he will love you enough to WAIT until you're both old enough to get married and have some education and enough life skills to deal with what babies can throw your way.

Also, the younger you are when you have your babies, the higher your chances of having a baby with special needs--mentally or physically handicapped, or BOTH. Think long and hard before taking that step...once you take it, there's NO going back.

Wendell - posted on 06/30/2012

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hunny do you know how risky having a baby at your age is? If you are on the small side you are really putting both yours and an unborn childs life in jeopardy... Lots of kids have died giving birth and LOTS more babies have... Your body right now is still developing and having a baby is going to force it to try and do so faster which will hurt you both now and later on... Trust in your heavenly father hun and know that when you are really ready to be a mom he will make you a mom...

Leslie - posted on 06/30/2012

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you dont know what you're talking about. you dont want a baby. a baby is not a doll you play with. a baby is a huge responsability and obviously you kids are still babies yourselves. you are not mature enough to have a a baby. If you have a baby now, you will ruin your life. babies get sick, you have to spend nights in the ER (even if they are normal kids), if they have other issues like cancer, leukemia, addisons disease, sickle cell anemia and millions of other options, you may spend your life in the hospital. IN addition, babies poop a lot, you will spend thousands of dollars per year buying diapers for about 2 or 3 years. Then they require to be fed, bathed, put to sleep. and they dont really sleep, they'll be screaming every two hours and you will never sleep again for about 4 or 5 years, and then when they are teenagers they get worse.. Like you now! trust me you dont want any babies now. You wont be able to go have fun again with your friends. you wont have any time for yourself. And you never know if Isaiah wont stand all the responsability and run away himself leaving you with the baby. NObody is ready to have a baby until you've finished your career, and then you make enough money to pay a babysitter to watch the baby once in a while while you go get your nails done. And I forgot to mention the mess tha babies make. They throw food everywhere, they write on the walls. and since they take all of your time, you wont have time to clean it. Trust me I have three babies. They are beautiful, they are wonderful. They are a blessing, but I graduated. My husband and I have been married for 8 years and we are 30 and 32 years old. Never at 14 I would have thought to have a baby. By the way, we had one baby, and then wanted to give him a sibling, and now we have three babies, because sometimes pregnancies give you twins (or more). So stay put, dont have sex yet. you're not missing out on anything. Your time will come. Enjoy your teenage years, keep busy. Read a book, go to the gym and get that freaken baby out of your head. If you want to know what babies are really like, come babysit for me, but not for an hour or two. Stay here for a full day, and see if you can handle it.

Christine - posted on 06/30/2012

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You really need to think of who will pay for your medical bills during the pregnancy, and who will pay for the babys health after the birth and the groceries to feed you all and a place to live. You will def.need to be on the state insurance and be on welfare, and trust me, you do not want to do that. The place is so nasty and you will be treated bad and people will always treat you like a Hoe. Been there, done that..If your asking, then you both are not ready, and I can bet, he will not be there for you because he will not be handle the responsibility. Its very tough and hard!!

Kissy - posted on 06/30/2012

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Please rethink what your talking about. I was a mom at 15 and while I love my daughter very much and wouldn't trade her for the world, I also wouldn't wish that responsibilty on anyone. Boys will be boys and say whatever they have to, to get what they want SEX. Yes Isaiah may think that now but will he still think that when it happens? Most do not. Kiss high school, your friends (even your best friend) goodbye because no one wants their children in that situation, what you do, your friends parents will fear they will do. Who will support this child? Love at 14 is a wonderful thing and ment to be charished. You can't charish those memories when you don't get to experience them because your worried about providing for a child. As for being to small you are right to be scared I was 100 lbs when I had my daughter and it tore my insides up making it imposible for me to have children with the man I fell in love with years later. This may sound like a mom lecter and in a way it is, talk to your parents before you make your decission, good luck

JoAnn - posted on 06/30/2012

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I don't want to tell you what to do but believe me being a teen mom is hard. I had my oldest child when I was 17. I am still getting out of debt and I am 31 now. I have had very little help from his father, who said he would always be there. I also had to drop out of school to support him.(I was two weeks shy of graduating with honors.) Life is hard enough when your a teenager. You should worry about what to wear to prom, where you and your friends are going to hang out, and stuff like that. Not what type of clothes to put on a baby, who you are going to get to watch your baby while you go to work(no time to hang out with friends), and how you are going to get you and your baby anywhere since you are only 14 and can't drive. Like I said before I am trying to tell you what to do but I have been there and done that. Believe me I love my son to dealth but if I could do it over again I would of waited so he could have a better life.

Sandra - posted on 06/30/2012

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My dear the word of being pregnant with tender age sound simple, why cant you hold on until you are fit enough to became a mum.Speak with your mum see if she will agree with your feelings. With me i can only advice you to use protection if you and your boy freind you want to go far.This is serious.Speak to your mum.

Lisa - posted on 06/30/2012

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Are you kidding me? You can't even spell. How do you think you're going to raise a child? You won't be able to. I'm not going to give you a long loving response. Basically, you're being stupid and selfish and if you do have a baby, it's the baby that will suffer. One more child that will go through a hellish childhood and the rest of society will have to pay for your stupid mistake. If you're going to have sex, use birth control!!!!! That way the rest of us won't have to pay for your mistakes. And another drop out who brings down our society. Nice.

Mary Louise - posted on 06/30/2012

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Baby do not do it. There is no way to know if he will be there for you. This young man sound immature. I was a mom at 14 and it was hard. When my friends went on their proms I was unable to go because I had a child. Please enjoy these years, you have time to have a child after you finish school and enjoy your life. There was so much I missed. God bless you.

Jodi - posted on 06/30/2012

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If this is for real;
1. He doesn't love you, he wants to have sex with you
2. Get a job or volunteer in a daycare center as an assistant, work there 7 days a week for a month and get a reality check.
3. You are currently illiterate, stay in school, you still need to be educated because you do not even know how to spell pregnant. Without an education you will never be able to support any child you bring into this world
4. Talk to your mom, see if you can muster the guts to have an adult conversation, after all, having a child is an adult activity.

Nicole - posted on 06/30/2012

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I think if after reading everyone posts you still want to have a baby you should try and get an automated baby that cries and wets itself. They're very realistic and record everything that they do and how you respond to it. Have your boyfriend and yourself take care of that for a few weeks and see how you feel about being woken up every one-three hours at night to feed or change the baby. You said you though everything out and are ready I can tell you now you haven't thought of everything b/c things come up after the baby is born that you will never be able to think of now...trust me! I have a four month old and she surprises me everyday and I'm 28. Also have you thought of health insurance? So far my daughter have been to the dr six times since she was born plus the cost of the hospital stay for you and the baby, I have awesome coverage and i still owe $2000 for my daughter being born. I'm sure your boyfriend is a great guy but when it comes to teen boys taking care of the babies they make there is a slim few who actually do it and unfortunately you probably will be taking care of you baby alone. Please think it over and wait, in my opinion the longer you stay in school and take of yourself without having to take care of a child the better off you (and the baby) will be when you have a baby

Nancy - posted on 06/30/2012

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Get your education first - then try sending this message again - with grammer, spelling, etc correct. In the meantime take up babysitting - that should help you face reality.

J - posted on 06/30/2012

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I would like to suggest that you wait. Please consider the responsibilities of raising a child - it is not 'dolly house'. Boys/men would promise to stay around if you become pregnant, however, that does not usually happen. Your boyfried would say anything to get in bed with you. Please talk to your parents or someone you trust and respect. You are too young; you have a lot of growing up to do. Enjoy your youth! Complete your education, have a career, become mature and then you may be ready to have a child. If you tell your boyfriend that you want to wait, what would be his response? That would give you an indication of his intention. Do not feel pressured to have sex!

Courteney - posted on 06/30/2012

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My boyfriend also wanted me to tell you his opinion in the hopes that it will help you....your boyfriend probably just wants to have sex and isn't really thinking about the consequences...it sounds like he doesn't care about anything but having sex and maybe bragging to his friends and he will probably run if there are any consequences...and you should definately talk to your parents about this.

Courteney - posted on 06/30/2012

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Oh sweetie...that is not what you want even though it may seem like it now. You have many years to have children don't do it too early. I had my first child at 21 and I even think that was early. I was still in college and I had plans. You should go to college, travel or work for awhile and make sure that you've done what you want with your life before you have children. Don't get me wrong children are wonderful and amazing and it is so great to watch them grow up but your still so young and it will be very hard for you being a teenage mother. If you want to have sex which I am not saying is a good idea since you are so young you need to use condoms and get on birth control and be safe and protected. If something happens and you get pregnant then you should definately tell your parents right away and with their help you can figure out what the best thing is for everyone. It isn't fair to a child to have a mother who is so young and inexperienced. And not to be mean to your boyfriend but guys always say they will be there and he may mean it but maybe not. I do have a suggestion for you though....if you love babies and kids maybe you should volunteer at a hospital in the nursery or find some other kind of volunteer opportunity where you can be around babies and help out a few times a week and not have the huge responsibility of raising a baby so young. I really hope this helps you and if I was harsh or rude at all I apologize but my mother had me at 15 years old and it made things very complicated for her even though she had both her parents full support financially and emotionally. My dad wanted nothing to do with me and I have met him once and occasionally we say hi on facebook or something and thats all. My life was crazy and my mother missed out on a lot in her life because she had me too young. Please talk to your parents or a counselor before you make any decisions.

Valerie - posted on 06/30/2012

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Kayla just because a boy says he loves you doesn't mean you need to have a baby with him. My mom had me at 15, and because of that she married a man 25yrs older than her. When she turned 21 she decided to leave him, he decided if he couldn't have her, no one could. So he killed her and killed himself. Leaving me and my brother to be raised by family. I'm not saying your life would turn out like that, but that is a risk I wasn't willing to take. I waited until I was 22 to have my first child. I had a great job, and was financially able to support myself and my son. Think about what you want out of life before you bring someone else in to this world.

Lydia - posted on 06/30/2012

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I just glanced through a few of the posts on here, and most of them seem to say that you shouldn't because of your age, which I 100% agree with. I have a 15 yr old myself (who is my youngest of 4), and I discourage her from even having a boyfriend because she needs time to figure out who she is and make a life for herself before she gets involved with a guy. But another side that no one even seems to have considered is, how old is your boyfriend, Kayla? Do you realize that you are too young to legally consent to have sex? How old is your boyfriend? If you become pregnant, you may get your boyfriend into some very hot legal trouble. If he is in jail for statutory rape, how will he be there for you then? Seriously, girl...don't do this... You are way too young. Find some activities to be involved with in school or your community.

Tiffany - posted on 06/30/2012

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wow your still jyoung dont go having a baby you still have life to life and your boyfriend is young most teen moms their nboyfriends so o i love ylou and wouldnt leave but in all reality thats the first they do is run because they are really scared what others will think n their parents will be mad n they are too young that they honestly dont want to be strapped down at this age

YANAIS - posted on 06/30/2012

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This is simple, your old 14, you think yourll in love, he says he's going to stick around most likely he won't!!!!!!!! Stay in school, have fun with your friends when you tur. 18 go to the club have fun your only young once!!!!!! When you have a kid and see your friends going out having fun and you cant go your going to regret having a baby at such a young age. Your only 14 you can't get a job. Your going to have to drop out school to tale care of the baby. I wouldn't say this to anyone but watch teen moms on mtg look how hard they have it. They make it look easy but its not!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please listen to everyone here DO NOT HAVE A BABY AT 14!!!! STILL A VIRGIN. I was a virgin till I was 19. And it was the best choice I made for myself

Shincy - posted on 06/30/2012

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Seriously Jodi the spelling of "pregnet" was answer in itself. The only advice for d teen is think u r not just giving birth to a baby(like pretend games my toddlers do with their baby dolls) u r going to create a life, n it's ur responsibility that baby is healthy n is given proper care to make a good human being na responsible citizen..

Sharon - posted on 06/30/2012

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Are you nuts.Have you seen Teen mom the series.You have your whole life ahead of you.Finish school,go to college ,get a career, then think about kids.What are you going to do now if you have a child.Your boyfriend would have to get a job flipping burgers and who knows where you will stay if your parents decide to kick you out god forbid! think about this with your parents,your way too young to have a baby.I had three older sisters that had kids when they were 17 and it ruined their lives.All of them are on welfare now and lead sad lives.I waited until I was 27 and I feel really happy that I got a solid life for my two wonderful children.Believe me ,your boyfriend will care when he has to get up every three hrs with the baby and has to work the next day at 6am.just set your alarm clock for every three hrs and get up for half an hr each time.Do this even for a week and you will change your mind.It is a HUGE life decision,get a puppy if you want something to love,at least think about it.PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!My E-mail is nfblond29@yahoo.com if you need more advice.
Sharon,nl,canada

Sara - posted on 06/30/2012

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Just because you are a teenager doea not mean you will get on tv for having a baby it is hard. I had my daughterbwhen I was 17 and now I have I two there dad took off when he realised that work and a kid ment not time for friends. Now I am a single mother of two and work 72 hours a week never have any extra money it all goes to the kids and bills for example i have a house to pay for you are not even old enough to sign a lease for an apartment my little girl is adhd and has to take medicen that cost 268 ollars a month alone and i never go out. Don't get me wrong I love my kids and if I w I would get them just as they are I would have waited

Sandy - posted on 06/30/2012

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Really!!?? Haven't you seen the show "Teen Mom"? Haven't you had ANY kind of education at your school yet?? You do not need to have sex yet. You were created for so much more!!! If you are being hit at home, that is not right. You need to get help for that. NO ONE should hit you when they are angry! (as a small child you might have deserved a spanking, but as a teen, I don't think that helps in any way).

Very few young teenage couples stay together. So, when you and Isaiah break-up and you find someone else, you now have 2 men in your bedroom. The one you are sleeping with and Isaiah. Every relationship you have is with you forever. Would you like a bunch of other girls in your bedroom with your husband? Love is so much more than that funny feeling and having sex. Love is a commitment to the other person, through the good and the bad.

Babies are fun to cuddle with, but they grow up into terrible two's, three's, four's, (get my drift?) It isn't like a doll you can put down when you get bored. You can't just drop it off somewhere to get a break.

Please, don't do this. God created you for something better, even if you can't see it now.

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